Germs Jokes

Funniest Germs Short Jokes

Short germs jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The germs humour may include short bacteria jokes also.

1. They say money is covered in germs But I don't think even germs could live on the money I make.
2. Why did we use guns in world war 2 against the Germans? We could've used Frebreze, it kills 99.99% of germs anyways.
3. So my 12 year old son asked me what are Cooties. "Well son, when I was a child, we thought cooties were a germ only girls had"
   And then my son goes
   "So it's like Chlamydia"
4. I know a friend who doesn't use hand sanitizer because it only kills 99.9% of the germs. I don't get it. Get two squirts, and it kills 199.8% of germs.
5. What type of tree has the most germs? A Sycamore. (I came up with this one when I was like, 9.)
6. This holiday season, get your girl a Jared Diamond ...but get her Collapse--she's probably already read Guns, Germs, and Steel.
7. 2 VD germs 2 VD germs crossing the road and a big lorry hurtles towards them. One says to the other 'Looks like we're a goner ear.:
8. Cleaning products only kill 99% of all germs on a given surface. No wonder socialists hate the 1%.
9. In the 90's did the backstreet boys have a cafeteria? I mean a bacteria.Thank you ladies and germs.

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Germs One Liners

Which germs one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with germs? I can suggest the ones about virus and crabs.

1. If a single germ can infect over 300 people... Imagine what a married one could do.
2. My father's sister is obsessed with killing germs, we call her Auntie Bacterial.
3. Why did the germ cross the microscope? To get to the other slide!
4. What do you call it when someone spreads germs all over your pizza? Little Sneezers
5. Chuck Norris kills 100% of germs.
6. What do you call a blind member of the SS who's always sick? A not see germ man.
7. What did Howie Mandel say when he was in a room full of germs? Get me out of here!
8. Where's germ originate from? Germany
9. How do germs figure out the temperature? They measure in Cell-sius.
10. What kind of watch does Germs Bond wear? An Amoeba.
11. A germ walks into a bar.... The soap kills him
12. where do germs go to get wasted? read des. the soap bar
13. Why does water make a noise when it boils? Cause germs asking for help.
14. When I was young, I thought all germs came from Germany.
15. 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 Do u guys/girls think that germaphobes are scars of the germ in the name?

Experience Good Cheer with Hilarious Germs Jokes and Friends

What funny jokes about germs you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean hygiene jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make germs pranks.