German Knock Knock Jokes
5 german knock knock jokes and hilarious german knock knock puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about german knock knock that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Comical German Knock Knock Jokes to Spread Joy and Laughter
What is a good german knock knock joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
Knock knock. 9. Nein your business.
German knock knock jokes are non interactive for efficiency.... and they're not very funny.
In the war, a German ship suspected that they were being tracked by an Irish submarine.
Unfortunately, they had used up all of their depth-charges.
As an alternative, one of their Divers decided to swim down to the submarine and knock on the door.
Joe wakes up to a noise on the roof...
...so he goes outside and sees that a bear has climbed up on top of his house. Joe runs inside and calls the first pest control number he sees in the phone book. The man on the other end says that he can remove the bear no problem and will be there shortly. 30 minutes later the man pulls up in a truck. Joe watches the man unload a big cage, a ladder, a shovel, a shotgun, and the biggest German Shepard Joe has ever seen. He asks the man what his plan is to get the bear off the roof. The man says that he will climb up the ladder and using the shovel will scare the bear off the roof. When the bear hits the ground the dog will grab it by the nuts and drag him into the cage. Joe says "that sounds like quite the plan but what is the gun for". The man says "if the bear knocks me off the roof then shoot the f!@#ing dog"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A German, a Mexican, and a c**...
A German, a Mexican, and a c**... all come to the U.S. together eager to live the American dream. Ready to work, they go around knocking on doors asking if anyone needs help. An old man answers the door and informs them that he needs a new barn built. The three agree to do it and follow the old man behind the house.
The old man explains what he wants and leaves them to it telling them that they'll find tools in the old barn.
The German takes charge and says, "I'll design it and supervise the job." Points to the Mexican and says, "You'll do the labor and dig the foundation," and points to the c**... and says, "You'll be in charge of the supplies."
Immediately the c**... takes off. After a little while the German completes the design and the Mexican gets right to work. A little while later the foundation has been excavated and the German and the Mexican look at each other wondering where the c**... is with the supplies. About half an hour later, the Mexican climbs out of the hole and joins the German in the search for the c**....
They are look around the old barn and as they're about to round the corner, the c**... jumps out with a smile on his face and his hands flailing in the air and yells, "SUPPLIES!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An elderly Italian man went to his parish priest
and asked if the priest would hear his confession.
"Of course, my son," said the priest.
"Well, Father, at the beginning of World War Two, a beautiful woman knocked on my door and asked me to hide her from the Germans; I hid her in my attic, and they never found her."
"That's a wonderful thing, my son, and nothing that you need to confess," said the priest.
"It's worse, Father; I was weak, and told her that she had to pay for rent of the attic with her s**... favors," continued the old man.
"Well, it was a very difficult time, and you took a large risk - you would have suffered terribly at their hands if the Germans had found you hiding her; I know that God, in his wisdom and mercy, will balance the good and the evil, and judge you kindly," said the priest.
"Thanks, Father," said the old man. "That's a load off of my mind. Can I ask another question?"
"Of course, my son," said the priest.
The old man asked, "Do you think I should tell her that the war is over?"
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