George Carlin Jokes
13 george carlin jokes and hilarious george carlin puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about george carlin that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest George Carlin Short Jokes
Short george carlin jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The george carlin humour may include short comedian jokes also.
- We could use some George Carlin right about now. But then he'd would be saying "I TOLD YOU SO!"
- Comedians like Chris Farley and George Carlin were so good, they're a national treasure Well, they used to be anyway
Now they're just buried treasure - I feel sorry for homeless gay people They have no closet to come out of.
(Credits: George Carlin) - In memory of the late George Carlin Catholics hate abortions.
Catholics hate homosexuals.
But who has less abortions than homosexuals? - "A team of medical scientists announced today that they have discovered a cure for apathy, however they claim that no one has shown the slightest but of interest" - George Carlin
- One out of every three Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of two of your best friends. If they are okay, then it must be you. - the late George Carlin
- George Carlin came back to life and his new stand up routine is incredible. It's called The Seven Words the CDC Can't Say on TV.
- George Carlin:"Why do laxatives always say 'Works gently, overnight'?" "What if I want something that works violently right now?"
- Men are four times more likely than women to commit s**..., even though women attempt it more. So men are better at it!
\- George Carlin
Share These George Carlin Jokes With Friends
George Carlin One Liners
Which george carlin one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with george carlin? I can suggest the ones about famous comedian and comedian lines.
- In America, anyone can become President. That's the problem.
~ George Carlin - I knew a t**... guy whose only ambition is to eat, drink, and be Mary.
Comical George Carlin Jokes to Spread Joy and Laughter
What funny jokes about george carlin you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean standup comedian jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make george carlin pranks.
George Carlin once famously joked, "Think of how s**... the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that."
Thanks to all those people wearing masks but leaving their noses fully exposed, the stupider half is now a lot easier to spot.
Guy runs a red light
A guy runs a red light. His passenger tells him not to do that, but the driver says "It's okay, my brother drives like this!" He runs another red light. His passenger tries to insist, the driver says again "I told ya, it's okay, my brother drives like this!" Then he comes up to a green light and stops. His passenger asks what he's doing now and the driver says "Well, my brother might be coming the other way!"
-George Carlin, I don't remember what standup special.
