Geezer Jokes
7 geezer jokes and hilarious geezer puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about geezer that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Giggle along as you read through some of the funniest old geezer jokes around! We've got jokes about life, the planet, being an old geezer, being in a bar and more! Perfect for a guy who loves to have a laugh!
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Laughter Geezer Jokes for Everyone for Fun and Frivolity
What is a good geezer joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
John, a wealthy 60 year old man, shows up at the country club one day with his new wife, a smoking hot 22 year old blonde.
His buddies are amazed. "There is no way someone that young and attractive would agree to marry an old g**... like you. How did you pull it off?"
"It's simple," John says, "I lied to her about my age."
"Did you tell her you were 50?" his friends ask. John shakes his head no.
"There is no way she could believe you were 40". John shakes his head again.
"So how old did you tell her you were exactly??"
John smiles and says "85".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So this old guy is lying face down in the sand on a n**... beach.
A hot blonde comes along and starts rhythmically smacking his buttocks like drums.
Then the g**... flips around, grins toothlessly at her and says, Why don't you play the flute instead of the bongos?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Old geezers sharing jokes
Group of old geezers been getting together at the same bar for decades. They always tell each other jokes. After awhile they know all the jokes so well, they just designate a number. Like ole Joe would say, 103, and everybody would be laughing their a**... off. One day a toothless Jack said 10,587! Everyone just roared, and roared and roared! Somebody whispered to his buddy, what's so funny about dat? His buddy said, Cause we haven't heard that one before!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do Batman and Black Sabbath have in common?
They both have a g**... butler.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
It is payday today and I feel like Uncle Scrooge now.
...a cranky old g**....
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So in a program on the BBC about WWII, the host is interviewing a surviving member of the Dutch Free Air Force.
The g**... says, "So there we were flying in formation over the English channel, when Suddenly these four Fokkers come out of the clouds. So I get behind the first Fokker and shoot him down. Then I do the same with the other three Fokkers."
The host interjects," For clarification, I think my guest is referring to the Focke-Wulf 190 German fighter plane."
The old man laughs and says, "No no! These fokkers were flying Messerschmitts!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Harry goes to the doctor
Harry, an 84 year old g**... is in for a checkup at the doctors office, he's sitting on the exam table, n**... under a gown. The doctor asks while reading his chart, "Well Harry, how are you feeling, any new developments for you?" Harry responds with childlike glee, "I feel great. There is a new woman in my life, she's fantastic" "Oh ya? Where did you two meet?" The doctor inquires. "Oh, well, ya know... She's a dancer." "Like a stripper, Harry? How old is she?" The doctor asks seriously. "19 years young... in fact, we are due to get married next week!" The doctor ponders thoughtfully and says to him, "I think you ought to reconsider. You know, prolonged s**... with a girl that young could be fatal." Harry shrugs and says, "Hey, if she dies, she dies."
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