gees Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious gees puns

Know why geese kill more humans every year than sharks?

Because it's really hard for geese to kill sharks.

Seriously though, fuck geese.


Ever wonder why when geese fly in a "V" one side is longer than the other?

Its because one side has more geese.


What is Barry Gibb better at than the rest of the Bee Gees?

Staying Alive


When geese are migrating, why is one side of the V longer than the other?

That side has more geese on it.


What are the Rolling Stones better at than the Bee gees?

Stayin' Alive


Why do geese fly south in the winter?

Walking takes too long.


You know when geese are flying in a V,

one side of the V is always longer than the other one? Know why that is?
Cause there's more geese on that side.


You know how geese always fly in a V shape, and one side of the V is always longer than the other? Ever wonder why that is?

It's because there's more geese on that side.


You know how when geese fly in a V one side tends to be longer? Do you know why that is?

More geese on that side


What's the name of the Russian Bee Gees cover band?



Last night I thought I heard the spring onions singing Bee Gees songs in my fridge.

When I opened the door I realised it was just the chives talking.


Two geese walk into a bar...

Maybe one of them should've ducked.


A young farmer was out, selling his rooster at the marketplace.

Another farmer get close to him, interested in the creature

-That's one beautifully colored rooster you have there

-Thank you, he is indeed good looking

-But does he do his job, you know, with the hens? asks again the other farmer

-Of course he does. All day long, he fucks hens, he fucks ducks, he fucks gees

-Does he really do that??

-Aaaall day long, even more, he sometimes fucks the cows, the goats, the sheep, everything!

-Waaait a second, if he's such a good rooster, why are you selling him?

-Because yesterday he started squinting his eyes when looking at me.


A catholic priest is praying

...I pray you Saint Anne...

Suddenly the devil appears: Oh, it's you again. For Pete's sake stop calling me if you don't mean it and at least pronounce my name right.

The priest shouts: Go away satan.

St. Anne appears: You want me to leave you? Gees, at least you could pronounce my name right.

The priest takes a piece of paper and writes using the sacramental wine:

I command you Satan, leave my church.

Dyslexic Santa appears:

Stop wasting the good wine! And what the heck you have against me?

(I modified the joke I wrote here earlier, I hope you like it)


Why do geese fly in V formation?

Because C would be too offensive.


I was once paid to scare the Gibbs brothers' horses...

so I gave the Bee Gees GGs the heebie jeebies


"You heard about the lady who died riding a roller coaster?"

"What? How?"
"Apparently the acceleration was too much for her."


Why did geese stop migrating?

Because they could no longer fly United.


How many geese does it take to form a gaggle...

5 or more


Why do geese fly south in the winter?

It's to far to walk.


Why are geese always such jerks?

They have fowl tempers.


What is Nicolas Cage's least favorite band?

The BEE Gees


Geese aren't waterfowl....

Because they're downright *deplorable*!


What do you call a man from Portugal?

A Portugoose. Because you cant have one gees.


When geese fly in a V formation do you know why sometimes one part of the V is much longer than the other?

It has more geese in it.


When geese (ducks, etc.) migrate, they fly in a V pattern. One line of the V is always longer than the other because...

... there are more birds in it.


3 geese hit their headwalk on a metal rod at the Fowl bar.

The fourth one ducks


Why don't geese fly over flint Michigan?

They turned the water fowl


What are the most funny Gees jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Gees? Well, here are the best Gees dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Gees pick up lines to share with friends.


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