The Best 53 Geek Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Geek jokes. There are some geek screenshots jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these geek broadband puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Geek Jokes and Puns
A group of computer science geeks were listening to a lecture about Java programming at a university.
After the lecture, one of the men leaned over and grabbed a woman’s breast.
Woman: Hey! That’s private OK ?
The man hesitated for a second looking confused.
Man: But I thought we were in the same class.
I would love to change the world, but they won't give me the source code.
Q: Why can't lawyers do NMR?
A: Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
Q: How did the elephant destroy the database?
A: His truncate it.
Q: What do you call a computer expert?
A: A control-alt-elite.
Do you like maths?
If so add a bed subtract your clothes divide your legs and we can multiply!
POST Server image uploads in android are easy.
Q: What is 001011010110101010100101010010101015 in binary?
A: A major glitch!
Q: Why does Luke Skywalker always ask for favors?
A: Because he needs someone to lend a hand.
Q: What do you call a group of 8 hobbits
A: Hobbyte.
A man walks into a sperm Bank.
He approaches a man who has just walked out of a donating cubicle.
He decides to start a conversation with him.
He approaches the man and says "So then, do you come here often?"
The man replies "Only when the internets off" and walks off.
You can explore geek freak reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean geek nerd dad jokes. There are also geek puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Warning!
User Error.
Kindly replace user and press a key to continue.
A lady tells the nurse at a maternity hospital, "
I want to call my little baby Ellie."
Nurse replies, "I'm sorry, but that name is already taken, perhaps you can consider naming her Ellie532 or Ellie_153?"
Q: What did one magnet say to the other?
A: I find you very attractive.
Q: How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?
A: We can see no need for uninstallation and have therefore made no provision for light bulbs to be removed.
Q: What does an SEO and part-time chiropractor work on?
A: Your bad backlinks.
Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.
Q: What will my computer printer warranty cover?
A: Your mouse pad.
Chuck Norris's programs can pass the Turing Test by staring at the interrogator.
A photon is checking into a hotel and the bellhop asks him "
Do you have any luggage?"
The photon replies, "Nope, I'm traveling light."
Three statisticians are out hunting.
Suddenly, a deer appears 50 yards away.
The first statistician shoots and hits the tree 5 feet to the left.
The second statistician shoots and hits the tree 5 feet to the right.
The third statistician starts jumping up and down, yelling "We got him! We got him!"
Hide a seek champion...
;
Since 1958
E-mail returned to sender, insufficient voltage.
Black holes are where God divided by zero.
If I wanted a warm fuzzy feeling, I'd antialias my graphics!
Why use Linux: No Windows, no Gates, no Bill to pay.
Chuck Norris doesn't use GUI, he prefers the command line.
No statement can catch the ChuckNorrisException.
Chuck Norris knows the value of NULL, and he can sort by it too.
Chuck Norris can access private methods.
Geeky Joke
There are 10 kinds of people: those who can count in binary, those who can't and those who weren't expecting a base 3 joke.
Geeky trigonometry joke my dad used to tell me
What sound does a horse make while walking?
*Clop, clop.*
What sound does a horse make while walking uphill?
*Clop, clop* multiplied by the cosine of the slope angle.
I plan on starting a geek rap band...
I think I'll call it Run-D.L.L.
IT guy
John is being shown around the office by his new boss. They enter the IT department and John sees a man using two keyboards at once. "That's incredible", says John. "Trust a geek to use two keyboards at once". "Hey!" replied his boss. "That's stereotyping. "
What did the band geek get at the orgy?
A tromboner.
Geek humor: Thanks for the upgrade...
You turned my floppy disk into a solid state.
My wife is a computer geek and wants to name our son "one eighth of a byte"
So I said "Really honey? Don't you think that's a bit...?"
Geek Booty Call... Fan Fiction
You're totally fan-fic worthy. I think someone's about to make an
appearance in Kirk's quarters next chapter.
Q: How many geeks does it take to ruin a joke?
A: You mean nerd, not geek. And not joke, but riddle. Proceed.
What do geeks and nerds love but cant have?
80085
What do you call a tall, obese computer nerd with a bladder control problem.
A Big Fat Geek Wetting.
What is a geeks favorite horror novel?
Information Technology by Stephen King
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs inside a volcano?
Anakin Skywalker.
(Happy Geek Pride Day!)
What do you call a group of IT guys that smoke meth?
Geek Squad
Two geeks are talking over lunch.
The first guy says, "You wouldn't believe what happened this morning. A girl rode up to me on her bike, took off all her clothes, and said 'Take whatever you want!' … So I took the bike."
The second guy says, "Good choice, her clothes probably wouldn't have fit you."
What do a Chinese Lycanthrope and a geek who attends a monthly sci-fi meetup dressed as a Klingon have in common?
They're both wereworfs
=D
What did one computer geek emo say to the other?
WinRAWR.
Why did the geek want to go to a party full of vampires, zombies, and ghosts.
He wanted to finally be the life of a party.
What do you call an anonymous medical dog?
A dog-tor. (If you're a geek, you'll get it)
What do you call a tech geek you joins the wrong group of friends
A miss-clique
GEEK BOOTY CALL... INCHES
I've got a 21-inch... monitor.
What is the best girlfriend for a computer geek?
One that turns his software into hardware.
For the geeks
An SQL query walks into a bar and sees two tables. He walks up to them and says 'Can i join you?'
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the geek trekkie jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working geek tech piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.