The Best 12 Gauge Jokes

Following is our collection of funniest Gauge jokes. There are some gauge handgun jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these gauge visibility puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Funny Gauge Jokes and Puns

Blackbeard the pirate sends his son BB Junior to kindergarten

As its the first day, the teachers want to gauge how smart each child is.

"who can sing the Alphabet" enquires the teacher

'Y'arrrr I can" says BB Junior

"Ok BB, go ahead" the teacher encourages

BB stands up full of confidence
"A B C C C C C C C D E F..."

"Stop" the teacher interrupts "thats not right BB there is only one C"

BB looks at her as if she's an idiot

"WRONG" he retorts "THERE ARE *SEVEN C's*"

A cop pulls over a woman

The officer comes to the window of the car and asks the woman "Mam, do you have any weapons in the car?"

The woman replies "Well, I have a 12 gauge in the trunk, a smith and wesen in the glove compartment, a colt on my side, and a derenger strapped to my boot."

The officer says "My god woman, what are you afraid of?"

She says "Absolutely nothing."

I ran into a complete stranger at my mom's annual New Years party.

I had never seen him before, so I asked him how he knew my mom. He said he had met her earlier in the day. Apparently, my mom was worried that the overall environment of the party wouldn't be as cool as she had hoped for, so she hired a professional to gauge the room.

I was absolutely disgusted.

I had found my mom's vibe rater.

Gauge joke, I ran into a complete stranger at my mom's annual New Years party.

What's Patrick Stewart's favourite scale of train?

N gauge

My Wife decided to buy me a mood ring...

...to gauge my moods.

We've discovered that when I'm in a good mood it turns blue and when I'm in a bad mood it leaves a big red mark in her forehead.


Someone stole my tire gauge.

I don't think I can take the pressure anymore.

How do engineers measure the distance between Railway spikes?

The Phineas Gauge

Gauge joke, How do engineers measure the distance between Railway spikes?

On a day full of infidelity, an American, French, and Japanese businessmen all returned from work early.

to discover their wives in bed with other men.

The American went straight for his 12 gauge shotgun.

The Frenchman began removing his own clothes.

And the Japanese man pulled out his business card and waited politely for his wife to finish and introduce him to the stranger.

How do you measure a feminists intelligence?

Stick a pressure gauge in her ear

Fun fact: Gauge Theory is the instantaneous rate of change calculated off a pre established baseline. A 12 gauge is how Kurt Cobain died.

Why couldn't the one-eyed scuba diver gauge how far he dove?

He had no depth perception

You can explore gauge incidents reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean gauge ace dad jokes. There are also gauge puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Rock stars & earrings

Rock stars are known for having multiple earrings or crazy piercings, but no one has topped Kurt Cobain, who went so far as to put a 12 gauge in his mouth.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the gauge thermometer jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working gauge measurement piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes