Garden Gate Jokes
12 garden gate jokes and hilarious garden gate puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about garden gate that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Garden Gate Short Jokes
Short garden gate jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The garden gate humour may include short garden fence jokes also.
- A feminist has just stolen my garden gate I was going to shout at her but I thought she might take a fence
- I looked out of my bedroom window last night and saw two blokes stealing my garden gate... I didn't say anything, because I didn't want them to take offence.
- I found out my friend has been stealing garden gates recently. I don't want to confront him though incase he takes offence.
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Garden Gate One Liners
Which garden gate one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with garden gate? I can suggest the ones about flower garden and garden fencing.
- I just saw someone stealing a garden gate! I didn't say anything in case he took a fence.
Garden Gate Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about garden gate you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean garden jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make garden gate pranks.
A farmer has a new handsome assistant
A farmer has a new handsome assistant. One morning they want to go out into the fields to work. At the garden gate the farmer sees that the roads are muddy and realizes that he forgot his rubber boots (Wellingtons for the Brits ;)
He tells his assistant to go get the boots from the house. The assistant returns and finds the farmers very pretty wife, along with the equally pretty daughter sitting in the kitchen. He tells them: "The farmer just said it would be alright if I had s**... with you right now!" The women look sceptical, so the assistant opens the window and shouts to the farmer: "Both?"
Farmer: "Of course both of them, what do you think?!"
Three nuns die and go to Heaven...
At the Pearly Gates, St. Peter tells them that they must each answer a biblical question to get in, but he reassures them that they're quite easy.
"Who was the first woman?" He says to the first nun.
"Eve." The gates swing open and she walks in.
"Where did Eve live?" He says to the second nun.
"The Garden of Eden." The gates swing open once more.
"Now, seeing as you're the Mother Superior, you must answer a more difficult question, what was the first thing Eve said when she saw Adam?" St. Peter says to the third nun.
"Oh, that's a hard one..."
The gates swing open.
3 nuns go up to heaven...
Three nuns go up to heaven. Peter's at the gates and he tells them they have to answer a question before they can come in. So he says to the first one "what was the name of the first woman?" She says "Eve" and he lets her in. He says to the second one "where did Eve live?" She says "the Garden of Eden" and she too is allowed in. Then he says to the third nun "what was the first thing Eve said when she saw Adam?" She says "oh, that's a hard one", and he says "yeah, you're in…"
A postal carrier is working on a new beat.......
when all of a sudden he comes upon a garden gate marked BEWARE OF THE PARROT!
Befuddled, he looks down the walk and into the garden and, sure enough, there is indeed a parrot sitting on its perch.
He has a little chuckle to himself at the sign and the parrot there on its perch.
The mailman opens the gate and walks into the garden.
He gets as far as the parrot's perch, when suddenly the parrot calls out: "REX, ATTACK!"
Three nuns arrive at the gates of Heaven...
St Peter is there to meet them and explains that before they can enter, they each need to answer a question.
He turns to the first nun and asks her "What was the name of the first woman on Earth?"
The first nun immediately answers "Eve!"
"Congratulations!" says St Peter, "You're in!"
St Peter then turns to the second nun and asks her "Where did Eve live?"
The second nun immediately answers "Garden of Eden!"
"Congratulations!" says St Peter, "You're in!"
Finally, St Peter turns to the third nun, who happens to be the Mother Superior.
"Now, since you're the Mother Superior," he says, "your question has to be a little more tricky. What did Eve say when she first saw Adam?"
"Ooh..." says the third nun, "That's a hard one..."
"Congratulations! You're in!"
I visited a flower garden
Last week I visited a flower garden in my city. There is a lot of exotic and rare plants. The rarest of the plants are all in one part, behind locked gate. You can go there only with a guide or a presenter. Unfortunately, when I came, there was no guide available. I peeked in and saw a gardener tending to the plants. I asked him if he could let me in and show me around. He said, he cannot do that, only a presenter can do that. I really wanted to see those plant so I asked him why it cannot be him. He said "Well, I am a grower, not a shower.''
A Pope and a Jewish Accountant die...
So a Jewish accountant and the Pope die at the same time, and arrive at the pearly gates simultaneously. So St. Peter takes the two of them to where they will be staying for the rest of eternity. Peter leads the accountant to a huge palace, with dames and a heavenly garden. He then leads the Pope to a little shack. The Pope says, "After all of my life's dedication, I get this?" And St. Peter says, "Your Holiness, we have many Popes up here, but this is the first Jewish accountant!"