Garbage Jokes
155 garbage jokes and hilarious garbage puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about garbage that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Looking for a laugh? You'll find it here with our collection of garbage jokes. From trashy puns to stinky jokes, these jokes will have you laughing in no time.
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Funniest Garbage Short Jokes
Short garbage jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The garbage humour may include short junk jokes also.
- You know there's no official training for garbage men? They just pick it up as they go along.
- I saw a documentary about a submarine that recycles 87% of its garbage But I think this sub is doing even better!
- When I am tasked with sorting through a stack of résumés, I throw about half of them in the garbage. I do not want unlucky people working in our company
- Got a new job as a garbage man but I was worried as there's no training. The boss said I'll pick it up as I go.
- Becoming a garbage man isn't hard.... you just pick it up as you go along.
^^^*I'm* ^^^*terribly* ^^^*sorry* - I asked my grocer why garbage bags have become so expensive. He said there's been a hefty demand increase.
- Have you ever looked up synonyms for trash and found they are garbage?
What a waste.
;-; - I've been reading the thesaurus a lot lately... because a mind is a terrible thing to garbage.
- I told my wife to make sure the coconut oil is mixed nicely with the kale so I can easily scrape it into the garbage.
- You know, garbage man as a job title is a little sexist and outdated. We should call them garbage people instead.
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Garbage One Liners
Which garbage one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with garbage? I can suggest the ones about waste and rubbish.
- What has 4 wheels and flies? A garbage truck
...I'll see myself out. - Saw a clock in the garbage the other day! Can't believe people are wasting time!
- What has wheels and flies but it isn't an aircraft? A Garbage truck
- What do you get when a bee is stuck in a garage ? Garbage.
- I'm ashamed to share my most recent math pun.. It's | garbage |
- Rubble is a word for worthless garbage Sorry I meant ruble.
- I think I want to be a garbage man. I hear the industry is picking up!
- What do a common garbage can and Leonardo DiCaprio have in common? No Oscar!
- I love garbage day... Once a week my street celebrates me
- What has 10 wheels and flies? A garbage truck.
- If Beyblade's were a video game the final boss would be a garbage disposal
- My street looks like a garbage dump... ...litter ally!
- What do you call a group of garbage men? A collection!
- My dad told me to take out the garbage, but I said no.. I refuse.
- Epstein is like a full garbage bag It's not gonna take itself out.
Garbage Can Jokes
Here is a list of funny garbage can jokes and even better garbage can puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- The other day I was scraping leftovers into the garbage... ...and I couldn't help but think of those poor kids in Africa who don't have any garbage bins.
- A guy walks up to me and asks "What's Punk?" So I kick over a garbage can and say "That's punk!" So he kicks over the garbage can and says "That's Punk?" and I say "No that's trendy!"
- What has four wheels and flies? Garbage Truck.
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To be honest, just listened to Tig Notaro telling this one on Conan O´Brien's podcast. - What's the difference between me and the guy that comes by to pick up your trash once a week? He's a garbage man, and I'm just a garbage person.
- My girlfriend is one of the worst cooks in the world Just last night the raccoons offered me money to chip in for a lock on my garbage bin!
- I don't know which is scarier.... A clown who rummages through the garbage cans at 3am or my neighbor who watches me doing it.
- I'm married to Wonder Woman. She wonders when I'll grow up.
She wonders when I'll take the garbage out.
She wonders when I'll finally get a promotion.
She wonders why she ever married me. - Have any you ever tried to throw out a garbage can ? I leave it on the curb everyday, and its always there when I get back from work.
- I had a friend over to my house and he told me he could hear my garbage can chattering away. He asked me if I knew what it was saying? I told him I did not know, as I never listen to trash-talk.
- Being an HR, whenever I get a new batch of resumes, I always throw half of them in the garbage. I don't want unlucky people working in my department.
Garbage Man Jokes
Here is a list of funny garbage man jokes and even better garbage man puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why is there no gender-neutral term for Garbage Man? Because Garbage Woman is redundant
- I was reading a story the other day about a deranged garbage man running around for years, murdering dozens. Psychologists said he was a diagnosed Suciopath.
- What college did the garbage man go to? P U
- I was in Italy when I found a homeless man. I gave jim some cash and stole my wallet while I was doing so. What a piza garbage
- What do garbage man eat? Junk food
- Why was the garbage man arrested? Because he was bin laden.
- [Racist] A black man taking out two garbage bags was walking to a dumpster... A drunk guy asked him looking at the bags; How old are they?
- The man said,"This thermometer is garbage!' It's only accurate to a certain degree.
- I always wanted to be a garbage man since they only work one day a week.
- What's the difference between The Godfather and a garbage man? One makes you an offer you can't refuse, the other offers to can refuse.
Garbage Truck Jokes
Here is a list of funny garbage truck jokes and even better garbage truck puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What has four wheel and flies. I learned this joke as a child and it's the only joke I can remember. Have you heard this one before?
A Garbage Truck - A train carrying republicans to a retreat crashed into a garbage truck. It's all ok everybody. The trash was completely unharmed.
- I just bought a car. This sweet ride has four wheels and flies Its a garbage truck
- I ran after my neighborhood's garbage pick-up truck to toss my trash in when my wife called out to me...
- I saw a garbage truck the other day... I didn't know nick clegg was moving
- What do you call a truck in the garbage bin? CARbage
- What's the difference between a garbage truck and an albanian? The garbage truck is going places
Garbage Bin Jokes
Here is a list of funny garbage bin jokes and even better garbage bin puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What did they say about Baghdad after they installed too many garbage cans? It was Bin Laden
- I'm a recycle bin... I'm not garbage, but I might as well be.
- Did you know that if you step on someone's foot They will open their mouths like a garbage bin.
- What's worse than finding a dead baby in the garbage can? Finding a dead baby in the recycle bin.
- What do you call a vegetable in a trash bin? A garbage
Comical & Quirky Garbage Jokes for a Roaring Good Time
What funny jokes about garbage you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean dumpster jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make garbage pranks.
Dumping garbage
The Sheriff pulled up next to a guy unloading garbage out of his pick-up truck into a ditch. The Sheriff asks, "Why are you dumping garbage in the ditch? Don't you see that sign right over your head?"
"Yep," he replied. "That's why I'm dumpin' it here, 'cause it says: 'FINE FOR DUMPING GARBAGE.'"
Peeing in the Flowers...
A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her. One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 fell out onto the sidewalk.
Noticing this, a policeman stopped her and said, "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag."
"Oh, really? Darn it!" said the little old lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me officer."
"Well, now, not so fast," said the cop. Where did you get all that money? You didn't steal it, did you?"
"Oh, no, no", said the old lady. "You see, my back yard is right next to a golf course. A lot of Golfers come and pee through a knot hole in my fence, right into my flower garden. It used to really tick me off. Kills the flowers, you know. Then I thought, 'Why not make the best of it?'"
So, now, I stand behind the fence by the knot hole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers. Every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I surprise him, grab hold of it and say, 'O.K., buddy! Give me $20, or off it comes!'"
"Well, that seems only fair," said the cop, laughing. "OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"
"Not everybody pays."
World Cut Soccer
A little old Brazilian lady was walking down the street dragging two plastic garbage bags. One bag had a hole in it and $20 bills were flying out of it.
A policeman stopped her and said, "Ma'am, you're losing a lot of bills from that bag."
"Darnd!" she said, "Thanks for the warning. I'll go back and pick them up."
"Hold on there! Where'd all that money come from? Did you steal it?"
"Oh, no," she said. "My yard backs up on the stadium parking lot and, during tailgate parties, a lot of guys use my flower beds as bathrooms. So I stand behind a bush with my electric hedge clipper and when one is in mid-stream, I fire up the trimmer and say: '$20 or off it comes!'"
"Wow. Good idea!" laughed the cop. "But what's in the other bag?"
"Well," said the little old lady, "not all of them pay up!"
I was going to go as a worthless piece of garbage for Halloween...
...but then I realized I go as that every day of the year.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why does New York have all the lawyers while New Jersey got all the garbage dumps?
New Jersey got to pick first
Where do trailer park miscarriages go?
Out of the trash and into the garbage
When i was little my parents couldn't afford to buy me Garbage Pail Kids.
So they made me a dumpster baby instead.
I saw a documentry on saving the planet
They had some garbage facts
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a country full of people who throw garbage on the street, while repeating consonant sounds?
A litter nation.
An honest lawyer, a wealthy garbage collector, a teenage girl who's oblivious to what others think of her, and Santa Claus are in an elevator. Who's in the elevator?
Only Santa Claus, the other 3 don't exist.
"The garbage needs to go out. It's full of candy wrappers."
"Is Eminem in there?"
What's the difference between a garbage truck and a school bus?
One goes around neighborhoods picking up useless pieces of garbage that nobody wants in their houses anymore..
And the other's a garbage truck.
What's the difference between an elected official and a piece of garbage?
Garbage gets thrown out.
I know my Valentines day will be full of garbage...
...because I'll get dumped anyway.
Hmmm... If I throw a watch in the garbage....
Is that considered a waste of time..?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did God give the seagulls wings?
To beat the French to the garbage
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
When I woke up this morning, the garbage disposal was making a funny noise.
Turns out he was just m**... in the next room.
Why did the aliens choose to not invade and enslave the human race?
Because they're not garbage collectors.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why can't you trust a garbage man who loves his job?
Because he's always talking trash.
You know why I envy the garbage?
Because it goes out way more then me.
In our fight against garbage and overflowing landfills, I feel like we're under-utilizing our...
...active volcanoes.
I work for a garbage department in a garbage company.
The worst part is? *We don't even recycle.*
Why is garbage so sad?
It's down in the dumps.
Garage sales are garbage sales.
But the B is silent.
Why can't Ajit Pai be buried at sea?
There are laws against dumping human garbage in an ocean
Our President of Operations at work has a bright future with the city
He is exceptional at garbage management
What's the difference between litter and garbage?
Depends on whether the puppies survive or not.
Where does William Tell take his garbage?
To the dump to the dump to the dump^dump^dump
Where does the Lone Ranger take his garbage?
To the dump to the dump to the dump dump.dump, to the dump to the dump to the dump.dump dump...
What do you call garbage in outer space?
A Trashteroid
I used to have a girlfriend who, whenever she had a bad headache, would go into the cupboard, find my oats I'd normally eat for breakfast and then throw them in the garbage.
Apparently she couldn't cope with my grains.
What do you call garbage wrapped in small trash bags?
...dumplings
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Differences between Americans and British dialect.
British: Rubbish.
American: Garbage.
British: n**....
American: diper.
British: school.
American: shooting range.
My gf keeps putting her tampons in the garbage...
Talk about putting all your eggs in one basket.
The pathway next to my apartment building has never been cleaned, it's made out of garbage
Litteralley.
What do garbage men call their fellow workers?
Litterally, literally.
2016, the year our heros died. 2017, the year our heroes betrayed us. 2018...
Garbage day.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My fiance thought that all men are trash
I told her no, there are only a few garbage men in every town
A lawyer, garbage collector, and hair stylist sit down at a bar
The lawyer orders a shot of whiskey and drinks it right away. The garbage collector orders some tequila and downs it immidiatly. The hair stylist says "I don't do shots" and then quickly dies of polio.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
It's not fair to compare Trump to garbage...
...garbage was once useful for something.
I tried to tell a joke about homeless people eating garbage, but it didn't go well...
I realize now that it was in bad taste.
Just watched a 5-minute video of some guy throwing herbs in the garbage
What a complete waste of thyme
A man was helping his friend clean out his garage.
He noticed an amazing looking belt in the garbage can. It was black, with numerous stars and galaxies etched into it in intricate detail.
"Why are you throwing this out?" He asked.
His friend replied, "It is just such a waist of space."
An intern proudly greets his boss as she walks in the office...
"I took the pleasure of getting here early and doing a few tasks to help your day go smoother. I even pruned the ivy hanging on your wall."
She glared at him and stormed into her office and sure enough, almost half of the plant's leaves were in the garbage leaving the poor ivy looking pathetic. "What have you done!?! This plant is plastic!"
The intern smiled and said, "I don't think so, I did the same thing a few months ago and it grew back nice and full!"
The boss yelled, "NO IT DIDN'T! I BOUGHT A NEW ONE!"
What's the difference between garbage and a home gym's weights during the COVID quarantine?
The garbage gets picked up once a week.
A garbage man was doing the rounds one morning in Oklahoma
He came to a house where there was no bin out front, but there was a guy sitting on the porch.
The garbage man called out. 'Hey! Where's 'ya bin?'
The guy replies 'I've been in Florida'.
The garbage man says 'No. No. Where's 'ya wheely bin?'
The guys says 'I've really been in jail but I tell everyone I've been in Florida'
My wife and I argue every night that I have a garbage sense of direction
So I took my bags and right
