gangrene Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious gangrene puns

Amputate?

Doctor: Mr. Franco, I'm sorry to tell you that your leg has developed gangrene, and if we don't amputate immediately, you may die due to infection.

Shall I schedule the surgery?

Mr. Franco: Hmm... I'm gonna go out on a limb and say no.

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A woman was having surgery

A woman was having surgery to have her left leg amputated, due to gangrene. Unfortunately, the doctor mistakenly removed her right leg.

Realising his mistake while she was still under anaesthesia, he proceeded to remove her left left.

Later on, she sued the doctor for malpractice, but the jury did not come back in her favor.

They said she didn't have a leg to stand on!

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Two guys wait in the urologist's office…

The first guy says, I'm here because I've got a mysterious red line around my penis.

The second guy, I have a green line around my penis! Let me know what the doctor says on your way out.

The first guy sees the doc and on the way out sees the other man waiting, it went great! Nothing to worry about.

The second man sees the doctor, who take a look at the green and says, I'm so sorry. We're going to have to amputate.

But, Doc! The other guy has a line around his penis and said there was nothing to worry about!

There's a big difference between lipstick and gangrene, son.

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A gangrene infection

A doctor at a hospital was out back on a smoke break and noticed a man standing at the nearby dumpster. He approached the man to make sure everything was ok and noticed that this man was suffering from a gangrene infection on his leg. Being a caring doctor, he invites the man into the hospital to have his leg examined. During the examination, it's determined that the mans leg needs to be amputated. Upon waking up from his surgery, the man discovers that the doctor amputated the wrong leg. Furious and threatening a lawsuit, he undergoes a second surgery to remove the leg with gangrene. He sues the hospital but he ends up losing because the court ruled that he didn't have a leg to stand on.

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They say you shrink when you get older.

My grandma lost a foot in her old age, but I think that was more so due to the gangrene.

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What do the undead do to help the environment?

They go gangrene.

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Did you hear about the guy who got gangrene in his leg and they cut off the wrong leg? Yeah man it was really messed up. So then of course they had to cut the other leg off, ya know, because it had gangrene. So he sues the doctor right? And the messed up part is the judge throws it out of court.

Yeah he said he didn't have a leg to stand on!

(You have to tell it like it's not a joke until you reach the punch line. Gets people every time)

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Doctor: Do you want the good news or the bad news first?

Patient: Bad news
Doctor: You had gangrene in both of your hands so we removed them. The good news is that you are still alive. High five now!

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What are the most funny Gangrene jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Gangrene? Well, here are the best Gangrene dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Gangrene pick up lines to share with friends.

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