galaxy Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious galaxy puns

What do you call the security outside of a Samsung Store?

Guardians of the Galaxy

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I told my girlfriend we can either have sex, or I'm leaving to watch Guardians Of The Galaxy.

She said "I'm on my period and Guardians Of The Galaxy is sold out!"

I said, "It's alright, I'll just sneak in through the rear entrance."

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It was announced yesterday that the 2020 Summer Olympics in Tokyo will make all of its medals from recycled cellphones.

Well, they're going to make the Olympic torch out of a Samsung Galaxy.

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Just saw on the news that Apple is suing Samsung:

They claim that the Galaxy S3 has copied concepts used on the iPhone 6.

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If someone says "Someone in this room has a bomb," I can't rule myself out as a suspect.

- Sent from my Samsung Galaxy Note7

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If you're the guard at a Samsung store ...

Does that make you the guardian of the galaxy?

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What do you call it when there's a movie about the Guardians of the Galaxy before they met Star-Lord?

A pre-Quill.

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I think Samsung has messed up with my new phone's shipment.

I had booked a Galaxy Note ''S7'', not C4.

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I made a new mixtape, it was trash

Until I played it on my new galaxy note 7, then it was fire

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Samsung have done well with the Galaxy Note 7

Sales are blowing up!

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What do you call a security guard who works at Samsung?

a Guardian of the Galaxy

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If You Have Never Seen A Galaxy Explode

Just head to the nearest Samsung store.

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I said this to a mom I met at the park

If you were a Galaxy, you'd be the Milfy Way.

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The store tried to charge me $500 for a Samsung Galaxy knockoff.

I said "This is Huawei robbery!"

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What do you call the security guys at Samsung

The guardians of the galaxy

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I let my kids play on my Samsung Galaxy Note 7...

They had a Blast!

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I had a sip of the Milky Way galaxy.

It turns out I'm galactose intolerant.

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Samsung is permanently stopping production of the Galaxy Note7.

At least it went out with a bang.

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What do you call the security outside Samsung?

Guardians of the Galaxy



aight imma head out

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You know, said Arthur, it's at times like this, when I'm trapped in a Vogon airlock with a man from Betelgeuse, and about to die of asphyxiation in deep space that I really wish I'd listened to what my mother told me when I was young.

You know, said Arthur, it's at times like this, when I'm trapped in a Vogon airlock with a man from Betelgeuse, and about to die of asphyxiation in deep space that I really wish I'd listened to what my mother told me when I was young.

Why, what did she tell you?

I don't know, I didn't listen.


*- Douglas Adams, Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy*

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When I was at the immigration office, I interrupted an officer answering his phone and told him "Ship them back where they came from. They have a tendency to explode". He arrested me for being Islamophobic.

As I was dragged out, I was yelling "I was talking about your Samsung Galaxy Note 7!"

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A Galaxy Phone, an iPhone and a windows phone fall out a top story window.

The galaxy phone bounces with minor cracks.

The iPhone smashes into dozens of pieces.

The windows phone freezes mid decent.

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If you work Security in a Samsung store...

... does that make you a Guardian of the Galaxy?

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I love this time of the year...

when the nights are drawing in, there's a chill in the air & the whole family gathers round a roaring Galaxy Note 7

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iPhone vs Samsung

iPhone user: The new iPhone is coming out

Samsung user: What's new?

iPhone user: We're getting facial recognition

Samsung user: Had that 4 year's ago next

iPhone user: We're getting wireless charging

Samsung user: Had that 2 year's ago next

iPhone user: We're getting water resistance

Samsung user: Had that 3 year's ago next

iPhone user: Nothing is better that an iPhone

Samsung user: Your screen is from Samsung you know, it's our technology

iPhone user: What am i paying for then?

Samsung user: A galaxy s6

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What is Micheal Bay's favorite phone?

The Galaxy note 7

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Terrorists now have a brand new state of the art weapon that can be hidden in plain sight

The Galaxy Note 7

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So we landed a car-sized object on Mars...

...but we have no plans to bring it back. As a matter of fact there's at least 3 of 'em up there. Does this make us the rednecks of the Galaxy; leaving our broken down rovers all over our Solar System?

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The Apple iPhone 8, Samsung Galaxy S8, Snapchat Spectacles, and the Amazon Echo Show all came out in 2017. Who won the year?

The NSA

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Why did Samsung make the Galaxy Note 7 waterproof?

It can't catch fire underwater... I think.

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TO THE ADMIN OF THIS GROUP

CAN YOU PLEASE TRY TO HAVE A LITTLE MORE CONTROL OVER WHO YOU LET IN. THERE IS A NEW MEMBER. AN ELDERLY WOMAN. SHE HAS BEEN PRIVATELY MESSAGING MEN. SHE SENDS NAKED PICTURES OF HERSELF IN GROTESQUE POSES ALONG WITH CLOSE UPS OF HER LADY GARDEN. SHE IS OFFERING A SAMSUNG GALAXY S8 IN EXCHANGE FOR SEXUAL FAVOURS.
I AM ESPECIALLY UPSET BECAUSE AS IT TURNS OUT, THE PHONE WASN'T EVEN A GALAXY S8... IT WAS A GALAXY S5 AND IT OBVIOUSLY HAS A VIRUS BECAUSE IT'S REALLY SLOW. IF THAT WASN'T BAD ENOUGH... THE CAPS LOCK BUTTON STICKS

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I'm surprised we haven't heard a peep out of the NRA over the whole Disney/Guardians of the Galaxy thing

Usually they are hellbent on defending anything involving a Gunn.

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I know why all those Galaxy Note Sevens keep catching fire!

My mix tape comes pre-installed on them.

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What kind of soda do the Guardians of the Galaxy drink?

Groot Beer!

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This may be controversial to most people, but i feel it must be said. I FULLY support flying the rebel flag.

How else are we supposed to show our support and remembrance of the battle of Hoth, and our willingness to topple the empire and bring peace to the galaxy?

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What are the most funny Galaxy jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Galaxy? Well, here are the best Galaxy dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Galaxy pick up lines to share with friends.

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