Following is our collection of Friends jokes which are very funny. There are some friends pal jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these friends best friends puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
A lyft. Friends don't let friends drive drunk.
Well the jokes on them â they're imaginary too...
0% of my friends are Nazis, and thats a good percentage.
It was an incredibly hurtful thing to say and it completely ruined our bath.
Apparently, I was only supposed to name one, not two.
I really hope it's Todd, he's cute.
But I can't. I'm on a roll now
A woman doesn't come home one night. The next day she tells her husband that she had slept over at a girlfriend's house.
The husband calls his wife's 10 best friends. None of them know anything about it.
A man doesn't come home one night. The next day he tells his wife that he had slept over at a friend's house. The wife calls her husband's 10 best men friends. Eight of them confirm that he had slept over, and two claim that he was still there.
Walter: Hey son I bought you a pizza so you can share it with your friends.
Flynn: Thanks dad, how much do I owe you?
Walter: It's on the house.
they told me she was imaginary, but the jokes on them, because they are too.
She says "I have a boyfriend", he says "I have a math test".
The girl says "What's that got to do with anything?", he replies "I thought we were just naming things we are going to cheat on."
You can explore friends invite reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean friends out of state friend dad jokes. There are also friends puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
She hung up, told me not to worry. He told her he was gonna be late, he was out drinking with me.
..she is always setting booby traps!
My friends were worried, but I'll be 0K
During a party, a doctor is telling a lawyer that he is sick of his friends asking him for free medical advice. The lawyer says, "just do what I do, and leave a bill in their mailbox." The doctor decides he'll give that a try and thanks his lawyer friend. When the doctor gets home, he has a bill in his mailbox from the lawyer.
Son: Well would you talk to someone who is stupid, uses drugs and is an alchocolic?
Mom: Of course not.
Son: Well neither would he.
I hope it's Michael. Hes cute.
And five of them are black.
So this Dr hired my friend (who's a carpenter) to do some work around the house, the doc was curiously looking over my friends shoulder as he was putting a piece of molding to cover his uneven cut. The doc said with a cavalier attitude "that's an easy way to hide your mistakes!" and without thinking, my friend replied "yeah, to hide my mistakes I don't need 6 feet of soil!"
Because his whole life he's Ben Solo
She said "Yes!". I said "Good, because I'm breaking up with you."
Joke's on them, so are they!
It's called 'Facebook'
Because he 's married.
After honeymoon they throw a party celebrating their marriage...
After a few drinks, billionaire's friends want to know the secret of how he landed 25 yo hottie..
"It's simple" billionaire boasts...
"I faked my age"
"Yes, but even for a 40/45 years old guy...she is sensational, what age btw did you tell you are?" A friend asks.
With a smile on his lips billionaire responds
"85 years old"
Son: Well, would you be friends with someone who was stupid, took drugs and was drunk all the time?
Mom: No, Never!
Son: Well neither would he!
In an explosion.
I SHOULD NEVER HAVE NAMED 2 FRIENDS!
Imagine her surprise when they all disagreed.
In my group of friends I'm pretty sure it's Marc. He's really cute
So a couple of friends of mine, one black, one white were at a protest and wondered which carbonated drink makes the police the most peaceful. Turns out it really is Pepsi. You see, my white friend went up to the front of the protest and shouted to the cops "Anybody wanna buy some Pepsi?!" and the cops were all chill and happy, some even bought a can or two. But then my black friend went up to the front and shouted "Anybody wanna buy some coke?!"
It's a small scale operation
I got a lot of abuse from the relatives about my floral tribute in the shape a life jacket. But as I told everyone "It's what he would have wanted"
Apparently "ditto" wasn't the correct response.
Thanks for the updates friends, I just don't know how people get those yellowish stars and would really like to learn.
[edit] Thank you for the gold kind stranger.
Jokes on them, they're imaginary too.
They're like, "Hey, what's your friends name?" Never works on me ladies.
He only has followers, not friends.
Jill didn't come home one night. When she got home the next morning, she said she'd slept over at a girl friend's house.
Jack called ten of her best friends, but none of them said she had been there.
A week later, Jack doesn't come home. The next day, he says he spent the night at a buddy's house after getting too drunk.
Jill called his ten best friends. 8 said he'd been there the night before, while 2 said he was still there.
..my friends and family are worried, but I'll be 0K
It's almost as if they have become trans-parent.
And brought it to a table of friends.
She said, "If you lost a few kgs, had a shave and got your hair cut, you'd look all right."
I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you."
His friends described him as a warm and pulpy man who loved his wife and pelicans. He will be deeply pooped.
Thoughts and prayers.
His friends see him and say, Hey man, what are you supposed to be?
He replies, Oh, I'm dressed as a turtle.
His friends respond, A turtle? How are you a turtle? Who's that woman on your back?
The man replies, Oh that's just Michelle.
That percentage is zero.
Friends.
I don't know why.
I told her, if I lost 50 pounds I'd be talking to your friends!
I replied: "yeah, they came out of the closet this morning!"
2) Also, I don't want to be cremated.
**I see why.**
"What would your friends say are your weaknesses?"
"I don't have any!" Was my reply.
The interviewer seemed a little surprised and answered: "That can't be true. Everybody has some weak points."
Whereupon I said: "Oh no. You got that wrong. I meant I don't have any friends."
My friends are worried, but ill be 0K
They all laughed at me and told me she is isn't real.
Well Jokes on them because neither are they
CROW: I was with a group of friends
COP: What would you call that group?
CROW: âĶI want a lawyer
Everyone knows the more Ohms- the greater the resistance.
A woman went out and did not return home. On the next day she told her husband that she had slept at her friend's house. Not believing her, the husband called 10 of her best friends and none of them knew what he was talking about.
A man went out and did not return home. On the next day, he told his wife he had slept at his friend's house. Not believing him, the wife called 10 of his best friends. 8 of them confirmed that he had spent the night there and the other 2 said he was still there.
At age 40, success is having money.
At age 55, success is having sex.
At age 70, success is having a driver's license.
At age 75, success is having friends.
At age 80, success is not pooping your pants.
At age 100, success is being alive.
to be able to post this in a different sub.
Pull it out in class and everyone acts like you've been best friends since kindergarten.
They are due back in the library this Friday.
The first one says, "What a beautiful night...look at that bright, full moon." The second man stops and looks at his drunk friends. "You fool, that's the sun, not the moon", he mumbles. Soon, they start arguing.
As they are arguing, they pass by another drunk man. They both stop his ask him, "Can you tell us wether that thing up in the sky is the sun or the moon?"
The drunk man looks up, and then looks back and says, "Sorry, I don't live around here."
"I want to buy a tank!" "Buy it then." "But I don't have the money!" "Borrow it then." "But I don't have the money to pay it back!" "You'll have a tank by then."
I wish we could be friends with unemployment benefits.
he'll be very lonely because he pardoned all his friends
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Jimmy Falon's writer
Friends: no way!
Me: yup! Almost on a Monday.. almost on a Tuesday.. almost on a Wednesday.. almost on a Thursday, almost on a Friday, almost on a Saturday and almost on a Sunday!
When they got to the checkout one of the ladies started rummaging through her purse for her wallet, she took out a few things, including a TV remote.
Do you always take the remote with you when you go shopping? The other woman laughed.
No, the woman answered But I asked my husband if he wanted to help me shop and he said no, I asked him if I could take the car and he replied that as long as I left him the TV, I could take whatever I wanted and get out of the house.
So I turned to the fashion channel and told him he had nothing to worry about.
A couple icebergs in Antarctica are best friends. They grew up together and have known each other since they were ice cubes.
One iceberg decides he's tired of all the cold weather, he tells his best friend he's going on a warm vacation for a couple weeks. A couple weeks pass by and he returns to Antarctica. His best friend immediately takes notice of the amount of weight his friend lost while on vacation.
He says "you look amazing my friend, you really slimmed down! Was vacation everything you thawed it would be?"
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the friends guys jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working friends three friends piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.