Fowl Jokes

Humoristic puns and funny pick up lines

What do you call a group of chickens dressed up like crows?

A murder most fowl.

(I'll see myself out...)

NASA CHICKEN CANON

NASA engineers build a cannon that launches dead chickens at the windshields of airplanes, military jets and such to test the strength of the windshields against collisions with airborne fowl.

British engineers are eager to test it on the windshields of their new high-speed trains. Arrangements are made, and a cannon is sent to the British engineers.

When the cannon goes off, the engineers stand shocked as the chicken crashes into the shatterproof shield, smashes it to smithereens, blasts through the control console, snaps the pilot's backrest in two, and embeds itself in the back wall of the cabin.

The horrified Brits send the Americans a report of the disastrous results, along with an urgent request for suggests on improving the windshield design.

The American engineers respond with a one-line memo: "Thaw the chicken."

I was making chicken noises in class

Got a detention for using fowl language

Why don't you take a turkey to church?

Because they have fowl language

I want a pet duck

But can't get one in my town without an agricultural permit.

Oh, well. no farm, no fowl.

Why did the police arrest the Christmas goose?

They suspected it of fowl play.

A man reported that his chickens had been stolen off his property

Police suspect fowl play.

Did you hear about the guy who died after eating chicken?

The meat was fowl.

A chicken walks into a bar

and clucks at the bartender. The bartender says, "No fowl language allowed"

What is the most Shakespearean way to eliminate bird flu?

Murder most fowl.

Why did the duck get a red card?

For fowl play.

Why did the chicken go to jail?

Fowl play.

I don't understand why people like chicken...

It's just fowl.

Did you hear about the man who was arrested for molesting a duck?

He was suspected of Fowl Play

I stubbed my toe and got scolded by my parents for yelling What the duck

They were angry that I used fowl language

One for all of us country folks

Visiting the countryside on a hunting trip, the well-dressed man from Washington takes aim and shoots a duck. But the fowl drops into a farmer's field, and the farmer claims it. Since both want it, the farmer suggests settling the dispute with an old fashioned hick-kick. "I kick you as hard as I can in the crotch, then you do the same to me," he explains. "Whoever screams the least gets the bird." The city man agrees. So the farmer winds up and delivers a crushing blow to the man's privates, and he collapses to the ground. Twenty minutes later, when he finally manages to stand, he gasps, "My turn." "Nah," says the farmer, turning away. "You can keep the duck."

What was the turkey suspected of?

Fowl play.

A man was found dead on his chicken farm.

I heard the police suspect fowl play.

How does raw chicken taste?

Fowl

A chicken, duck and quail were found dead on a swing set.

The police suspect fowl play

it appears a chicken was found dead under mysterious circumstance.

police suspect fowl play.

My wife is leaving me over my duck puns.

She couldn't stand jokes so fowl.

A handful of short Thanksgiving Jokes I put together that are worthy for any dad to repeat this upcoming holiday.

**Why did the police arrest the turkey?**
> They suspected fowl play.

**What would you get if you crossed a turkey with a ghost?**
> A poultrygeist!

**Why did the turkey cross the road twice?**
> To prove he wasn't a chicken!

**What key won't open any door?**
> A turkey!

**If you call a large turkey a gobbler what do you call a small one?**
> Goblet.

**Fruit comes from a fruit tree, so where does turkey come from?**
> A poul-tree.

**What happens when you're too harsh on the cranberries and make them sad?**
>They turn into blueberries.

**What kind of cars would pilgrims drive today?**
> Plymouth.

Why aren't birds allowed to talk on television?

Because they have fowl language.

Whats the difference between a murder and Hamlet performed by geese?

Nothing, they're both fowl play

Just ate goose for the first time

It was fowl

I killed a chicken.

It was murder most fowl.

How does a duck get a strike?

When he hits a fowl ball. If he gets three strikes he's probably a turkey.

Why aren't kids under the age of 18 allowed to watch videos about duck calls without the consent of a parent?

Because they contain a lot of fowl language.

Dr. Doolittle learned to talk the language of thousands of animals.

But not the language of ducks..

They were just too Fowl.

I never use fowl language

I just don't give a cluck

Why did the duck get suspended from school?

For fowl language

the fowled experiment

scientists at NASA have developed a gun built specifically to launch dead chickens at the windshields of airliners, military jets and the space shuttle, all traveling at maximum velocity. The idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of the windshields.

british engineers heard about the gun and were eager to test it on the windshields of their new high speed trains. arrangements were made. but when the gun was fired, the engineers stood shocked as the chicken hurtled out of the barrel, crashed into the shatterproof shield, smashed it to smithereens, crashed through the control console, snapped the engineer's backrest in two and embedded itself in the back wall of the cab.

horrified the britons sent NASA the disastrous results of the experiment, along with the designs of the windshield, and begged the US scientists for suggestions.

NASA's response was just three words, "thaw the chicken".

LPT: When cooking chicken, it needs a lot of support

Alone, it tastes absolutely fowl.

How do you know when your chickens gone bad?

It tastes fowl.

I know a cat who thinks he's a chicken.

I tried to teach him otherwise, but he was in too much of a fowl mood.

I don't know why Chic-Fil-A is so popular...

Their food always leaves a fowl taste in my mouth.

What do you call a group of crows dressed as geese?

A murder most fowl

A man was killed by ducks last week

I guess you can say that's a pretty *fowl way to die*

Why did the Hen make her Rooster cross the road?

Because he was using fowl language.

I don't eat pheasant.

Its a little fowl.

What do you call a chicken that drinks too much in the club?

A party fowl.

Did you hear about the two ducks who got in a fight?

Fowl play was suspected.

My chickens were clucking at me

Little did I know, they were using fowl language.

Why did she spit out the turkey soup?

She said it had a fowl taste.

A dead goose was discovered on the sidewalk today.

Fowl play is suspected.

Why did the chicken get into so much trouble?

Because of its fowl language.

What's fowl and swine, but people can't resist shoving down their throat?

A turkey and ham sandwich.

I'll see myself out.

How does a chicken do their hair?

With a comb, In one fowl swoop.

Fact: It is against league rules for an NFL player to own a pet duck.

It's considered a personal fowl.

Why don't we drink chicken milk?

It tastes fowl.

Somebody stole my Thanksgiving turkey...

I suspect fowl play

(IT'S THANKSGIVING TOMORROW! HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!)

I saw a flock of angry ducks the other day.

I wonder why they were in such a fowl mood.

What do you call the killing of a duck?

A murder moist fowl.

What are the funniest fowl jokes of all time?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking about Fowl? Well, here are the best Fowl puns to laugh out loud. Crazy and funny Fowl pick up lines to share with friends.

Joko Jokes