Fourth Jokes
145 fourth jokes and hilarious fourth puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about fourth that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Celebrate the Fourth of July with jokes that will leave your friends and family in stitches! This collection of fourth grade jokes, fourth wall jokes, and stories are sure to put a smile on everyone's face. Whether it's your 6th Fourth of July or your first, rinse, repeat and laugh with these jokes and brandy.
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Funniest Fourth Short Jokes
Short fourth jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The fourth humour may include short sixth jokes also.
- Why do koi fish travel in groups of four? To protect the group from predators. When attacked, kois A, B, and C will go in one direction. The fourth one is the D koi.
- If laziness was an Olympic sport. I'd come in fourth so I wouldn't have to walk up to the podium.
- In Canada, we don't call the homeless homeless... We call them "three seasoners".
They don't make it through the fourth. - "Mom, Dad, I have something to tell you. I'm vegan." "Sweetie, we know. It's the fourth time you've told us today."
- At a party, a wife admonished her husband. That's the fourth time you've gone back for ice cream and cake. Aren't you embarrassed?"
* Why should it? I keep telling them it's for you. * - Eternal life Police have arrested a man for selling pills that promise eternal life.
Records show that it was the fourth time he has been arrested. His previous arrests were in 1760,1839, and 1946. - Why should you never loan lebron james a dollar? He will give you back 75 cents and say he wasn't sure about what happened to the fourth quarter.
- What first tipped Darth Vader off about the Millennium Falcon? He found their lack of freight disturbing
^^May ^^the ^^Fourth ^^be ^^with ^^you! - My new years resolution was to hit the gym more often. But I'm on my fourth car this year now. This is getting kind of expensive and I think the police are suspicious.
- A video game character walks into a health bar... ... and he remarks "that's the fourth wall I've walked into today!"
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Fourth One Liners
Which fourth one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with fourth? I can suggest the ones about 3rd 4th and fours.
- My roses are red/and your violets are blue/there is no fourth line (This is a haiku)
- Today is a military command: March Fourth!
- I knew my life was over when the fourth assassin shot me… It was a four gun conclusion.
- How to trigger a Star Wars fan..? Go Fourth and Prosper..
- Happy National Parade Day!!! March Fourth!!!
Told to me by my 6 y/o daughter - May the Fourth be with you. Like all good fans, we skip the first 3.
- He who goes forth with a fifth on the Fourth, may not come forth on the fifth!
- What did the Star Wars fan with a lisp say? May the Fourth be with you.
- What day do soldiers hate the most? March Fourth
- Why did the Kool-Aid man stop acting on Broadway? He always broke the fourth wall.
- What was the Kool-Aid mans favorite wall to break? The Fourth Wall.
- Five most popular enhanced interrogation techniques.. .. The fourth one will shock you!
- What's one thing the Hulk would struggle tearing down? The fourth wall
- What do they call the Fourth of July in Hawaii? Dependence day.
- When did God created Battle Royale games? The fourth night
Fourth Of July Jokes
Here is a list of funny fourth of july jokes and even better fourth of july puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Happy early 4th of July everyone And to those who've been a defendant a fourth time then happy 4th of jury
- What do they call the fourth of July outside of the USA? The fourth of July
- Does England have a Fourth of July? They do, they just don't celebrate it.
- What did the parrot want in the Fourth of July? A firecracker
- What do you call laundry day when it's on the Fourth of July? Washington
- What's the difference between a cow and the Fourth of July? You can't milk a cow for over 240 years.
- A limerick for The Isle of Skye When I was on the Isle of Skye
I overdid the old Spanish fly
I had a stiff member
From the fourth of December
Till Friday the tenth of July - What does a pirate light on the Fourth of July? A m80.
- For dogs in the U.S. Sorry about the Fourth of July
Fourth Wall Jokes
Here is a list of funny fourth wall jokes and even better fourth wall puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Did you see the movie about the demolition team? It did a great job of breaking the fourth wall.
- Why is Deadpool such a good contractor on "demo day" when renovating old houses? Because he loves to break the fourth wall.
- When people ask about how life is going I tell them that it is so messed up that it can't be real. Therefore I sometimes talk to imaginary people.
That way I am supposedly breaking the fourth wall.
Fourth Grade Jokes
Here is a list of funny fourth grade jokes and even better fourth grade puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- My fourth grade teacher told me I would use cursive at least once a week, but she was wrong. I use it every day when food is delivered to my house.
- Studies show that on average 2 students in every fourth grade class can't count properly. It's usually one to three.
- In fourth grade, a teacher edited Chuck Norris's essay.
Big mistake.
You don't edit Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris edits you... with his fist. - Q: What is long and hard to a blonde?
A: Fourth grade.
Hilarious Fun Fourth Jokes That Will Have You Rolling with Laughter
What funny jokes about fourth you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean number 4 jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make fourth pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Australian, Englishman and Irishman man are sitting in a Pub
Australian, Englishman and Irishman man are sitting in a Pub with cold beers and all are relaxed.
Aussie says "Great, but back home there is a bar where the barman buys you your 5th beer once you've bought your fourth"
Well, says the Englishman, "back in Manchester my local has a buy 2 and get one for free policy".
Aah! says the Irishman, "in Dublin there's a bar where you get free drinks as soon as you walk in and they keep them coming all evening.Then they take you upstairs and you get non stop s**... all night".
"What, youve actually experienced this yourself"? asks the Aussie.
Well "no" says the Irishman "but me sister has"!
Relationships are a progression of 4 rings.
First is the "Friendship" ring, when dating is exclusive, but there's no more commitment
Second is the Engagement ring, when two people are so in love that they want to get married.
Third is the Wedding ring, worn when two people make a life-long commitment to each other during a ceremory attended by their friends.
Fourth and finally - is the Suffering. Starts about a year after Step 3.
An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar...
The first one orders a beer. The second one orders half a beer. The third one orders a fourth of a beer. The bartender stops them, pours two beers and says, "You're all a bunch of idiots."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why a fourth time?
A woman in her eighties made the evening news because she was getting married for the fourth time. The following day she was being interviewed by a local TV station, and the commentator asked about what it felt to be married again at that age and would she share part of her previous experiences, since it seem quite unique the fact that her new husband was a f**... director.' After a short time to think, a smile came to her face and she proudly explained that she had first married a banker when she was in her twenties, in her forties she married a circus ring master, and in her sixties she married a pastor and now in her eighties, a f**... director. The amazed commentator asked her why she had married men with such diverse careers. With a smile on her face she explained, 'I married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go.'
A man stumbles across an old lamp.....
A man was walking along a California beach and stumbled across an old lamp. He picked it up and rubbed it and out popped a genie.
The genie said, "OK, You released me from the lamp, blah blah blah. This is the fourth time this month and I'm getting a little sick of these wishes so you can forget about three... You only get one wish!"
The man sat, and thought about it for a while and said, "I've always wanted to go to Hawaii, but I'm scared to fly and I get very seasick. Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over there to visit?"
The genie laughed and said, "That's impossible!!! Think of the logistics of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete, how much steel!! No, think of another wish."
The man said "OK, I will try to think of a really good wish". Finally, he said, "I've been married and divorced four times. My wives always said that I don't care and that I'm insensitive. So, I wish that I could understand women, know how they feel inside and what they're thinking when they give me the silent treatment, know why they're crying, know what they really want when they say "nothing," know how to make them truly happy."
The genie said, "Do you want that bridge to be two lanes or four?"
Why is today John Philip Sousa Day?
Because he told everyone to march fourth.
One I made on my own. I've been told it is worthy of submission.
My friend, the architect.
So the other day I was talking to my architect friend who was working on one of his houses. I asked him how it was going, and he said pretty well. He said the first two walls had been raised, and that they were working on the third. I looked around, but didn't see any more building materials, so I asked what about the fourth wall? He looked up and said, what? You must be joking!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two English Muslims go on holiday in Spain...
Two English Muslims go on a long holiday in Spain, and they're having a wonderful time until one day the weather turns and it rains for three days straight. On the fourth day, one of them looks out of the window in the morning.
"Ahmed, I think we can visit some of the local buildings today. We should bring an umbrella though."
"Ah, but Hissam, how is the weather looking on the forecast? Is it Sunni, or is it s**...'ite?"
Four old ladies were sitting together...
The first one says, "My son is a bishop, and when he walks into a room, people say 'Your excellence.'"
The second one says, "Well, my son is a cardinal, and when he walks into a room, people say 'Your eminence.'"
The third lady says, "My son's the Pope, and when he steps into a room, people say 'Your holiness.'"
The fourth woman says, "My son's only a priest, hardly 5 feet but over 300 pounds. And whenever he walks into a room, people say 'Oh my God!'"
A man is waiting in line and sees another man...
He says, "excuse me sir, are you an attorney?"
The other man says, "yes. I am."
The first man says, "what is your fee?"
The attorney says, "$400 per four questions."
The man says, "isn't that terribly expensive?"
"yes." says the attorney. "what is your fourth question?"
4 men in a pub
4 men are chatting in a pub,
The first man says:"I sleep with my wife once a month",
The second man says :"i sleep twice a month",
The third says:"I sleep once a week",
The fourth man says:"I sleep twice a week",
Then the first man says: "What are you talking about? you aren't even married",
The fourth man replies: "Oh I thought everyone was talking about your wife".
A 90 year old woman is getting married for the fourth time.
A news crew is there to document the story. The reporter asks the woman about her odd marital past. "Let me get this right," he says. "Your first husband was a banker. Your second husband was a clown. Your third husband was a doctor, and you're about to marry a mortician. Why the menagerie of different men?" She smirked and said "It was one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready and four to go."
Four old guys go golfing...
And they start bragging about their sons.
The first says "My son is a lawyer, and he is doing so well, he just gave his friend a new car!"
The second says "My son is a doctor, and he is doing so well he just bought his friend a new boat!"
The third guy says "My son is an executive, and he is doing so well he just bought his friend a new house!"
The fourth guy says "Well, my son is a stripper at a gay club, but he must be doing pretty well because he just got a new car, a new boat, and a new house..."
Jesus said unto John, "Come fourth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.
How do you protect your teeth from entering the fourth dimension?
You get transcendental insurance.
Fourth Grade Logic
A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson in logic.
"Here is the situation," she said. "A man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yelling for help. His wife hears the commotion, knows he can't swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?"
A girl raised her hand and asked,
"To draw out all his savings?"
Three men walk into a bar
The fourth one asks "You guys ok? Didn't you see that low hanging bar?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the quickest way to a man's heart?
Through the fourth and fifth ribs
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Four old women were sitting on a bench
There were four old women sitting on a bench, minding there own business. When out of no where a streaker runs up to them and stops in front if the bench. Three of the women suffer a heart attack, the fourth has a s**....
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why doesn't the Jolly Green Giant patronize prostitutes?
He has no room in his life for a fourth h**....
A guy sits down at the bar and orders a Martini with two olives...
bartender gives him the drink, he takes out the two olives, puts them aside on a napkin, drinks the martini, asks for another. By the fourth Martini with two olives, the bartender asks the man "I don't mind, but I gotta ask....why do you ask for a Martini with two olives, then take the two olives out of it?" the man replies "My wife sent me to the store for a jar of olives but the store was closed."
A drug addict found a lamp. Genie appeared.
A drug addict found a lamp. Genie appeared.
"Now I will fullfill your 3 wishes" - he said.
"I wish two lines of the best stuff on the world. Let's take it together, it will be great."
"Ok, that was your first wish. Don't waste all of them on drugs" - genie said and two lines of the best stuff appeared. They both had a great party but suddenly the effect of these drugs ended.
"What is your second wish?" - genie asked
"I want another two lines of the best stuff on the world."
Another two lines appeared and they both were on high again. When the effect ended, Genie asked: "And your third wish?".
"Two lines of the best stuff on the world again."
Two lines appeared again and they were on high. When the effect ended, the genie appeared again:
"So, my friend, what is your fourth wish?"
Three men go into a bar...
but the fourth guy cleared it. Looks like he's taking home the gold medal!
I love a good track & field competition.
After my fourth failed relationship, my friend tells me 'keep your head up, these girls come and go, but you'll find someone for you', but deep down i know...
Girls don't just come and go... I do.
Three Nuns Walked Into A Bar
The fourth one ducked.
A husband and wife grow distressed as more and more uninvited guests swarm into their party.
The husband has a plan.
He moves to the front, manages to get everyone's attention, and calls out, "If you're from the groom's side, please stand up."
About one fourth of the guests stands up.
He calls out, "Those from the bride's side, please stand up."
Another one fourth of the guests stands up.
He smiles and says, "If you are standing up, please leave. This is a birthday party."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My fourth grade teacher told the class to go outside and sit Indian style...
so I drank a bottle of v**... and passed out in the street.
"Hey Dave!"
A guy is sitting in the left field bleachers of a baseball stadium, watching the game. In the first inning, someone pretty far behind him yells, "HEY DAVE!" The guy turns around and can't find who was yelling it.
This happens again in the fourth inning, and once more in the seventh. Frustrated at this point, the guy turns around and yells, "MY NAME'S NOT DAVE!!!"
The fourth Harry Potter book marked a huge tone shift for the rest of the series.
I mean, the fifth book was dead serious.
Four older men are bragging about their sons
The first says, "My son is a bishop, and when he enters the room people say, Your Excellency".
The second says, "My son is an archbishop, and when he enters the room people say, Your Grace".
The third says, "My son is a cardinal, and when he enters the room people say, Your Eminence".
"My son is 7 feet tall, and 500 pounds," says the fourth man.
"And when he enter the room, people say, 'My God!'"
...told by my parish priest.
My son asked me what made the Fourth Crusade different from the first three.
I told him it was a little unorthodox.
"Look at this!" I said to my roommate
"What happened?" he replied
"Look, the second, fourth, sixth and eighth plants are growing very healthily, but the other four are getting dry, even though I treated them the same!" I said
"Huh, weird!" he responded "water the odds!"
Did you know that Wookies can't smoke?
But they can *chewbacca*
May the Fourth be with you
A good way to tell If someone is getting married for the third or fourth time...
Their vows begin with, OK look...
the fourth!
Remember - the liquor stores are closed tomorrow so buy your fifth for the fourth on the third right this second as your first priority!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I entered a m**... contest...
I came in first, fourth and seventh.
...And Jesus said to Peter, "Come fourth, and you shall receive eternal glory!"
But Peter came fifth, and had to eat the biscuit.
Spam in the Middle Ages
A prince is awaiting a letter from his loved one for three days and three nights. On the fourth day, a pigeon flies in and drops a letter on his lap. When he opens it he reads:
"Get your sword forged for cheap"
A fort under siege held a 100m race for the women.
Mary, Pam and carol were the top three, sally fourth.
A soldier comes up and asks me what today's date is. I say "October fourth". He says
10-4
After the fourth batter was hit in game seven
My wife turns to me and says, they're not very good dodgers.
An infinite number of people walk into a bar...
The first orders a beer. The second orders half a beer. The third orders a quarter beer. The fourth orders an eighth of a beer...
The bartender pulls out two beers and tells them to know their limits.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My son was sent home from school again today.
He said it was because he was caught w**... in front of some third year girls. It's the fourth time this has happened so far.
I don't think he's cut out for being a teacher...
This girl told me she'd date me when pigs fly.
Right now this challenge is on hold the local farmer isn't letting me buy a fourth pig after the other three accidents.
What do you call it when you get your Mars rover stuck in a crater?
A fourth world problem.
It was believed that Helen Keller could see dead people and read people's minds.
She had the fourth sense
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Ladies at the Golf Course
Three ladies are chipping up to the fourth hole at River Hill Golf Club, when a n**... man wearing a paper bag over his head jumps from the trees and runs across the green. The three ladies stare in awe at the size of his manhood. The first lady says, "He is definitely not my husband." The second lady, gazes at his manhood and says, "He is not mine either." After a very considered inspection, the third finally says, "He's not even a member of this golf club.
"Pity about your boys coming in fourth in the world Cup!" joked Trump to Theresa May.
"Yeah..." she replied. "Pity about your boys coming second in Vietnam. Oh, you weren't there, were you?"
A man and a woman are on their fourth date at a fancy restaurant.
Things are getting pretty serious.
They look at each other and the man says: "I'm not sure how to say this."
She responds excitedly: "Just say it! Just say it!"
Him: "I don't know if I can."
Her: "Just say it!"
Him: "Wor-chester-shire sauce."
A survey showed that England had the highest Star Wars fan base in the world...
I guess the fourth is really with them.
According to a recent study, being married is the fourth best thing that could happen to a man.
The first three, in order: being single, being a widower, being dead.
Man arrested for selling eternal youth pills.
News has just come in about a man in the Dublin area has been arrested for selling pills that he claimed would give eternal youth.
Police records have shown that it is the fourth time this man has been arrested. The earlier arrests were made in 1799, 1852 and 1921.
The Fourth Wiseman
Unbeknown to most theologians there was a fourth wiseman who was turned away for bringing fruitcake.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What does a dropout and an unvaccinated child have in common?
They never get past the fourth grade.
My friend Billy Bob and I visited a place where you can stand in three states at once: Oklahoma, Kansas, and Missouri. Billy Bob opened up and said that he was actually in a fourth state; crippling depression. I said, I'm so sorry
... but you can't count Missouri twice.
This joke has to be told to someone in person
This joke has three parts. A man is driving and his wife asks him to slow down, he slaps her an says I'm the one driving not you .
The second part is, the woman is cooking food for her and her husband and the husband asks her not to put so much salt in, she slaps him and says I'm the one cooking not you
The fourth part is...
person listening: what you said there were three parts.
*slaps*
I'm the one telling the joke not you
Agamemnon was talking to Achilles
Agamemnon: what's the deal? These are the fourth pair of shoes you bought this week alone!
Achilles: I just cannot help it.... heels are my only weakness!
When my wife was in labor with our first child I read her jokes to pass the time...
When my wife was in labor with our first child I read her jokes to pass the time, but she didn't laugh at any of them. Nevertheless I've persisted with telling the same lame Dad jokes during the births of each of our kids. Today she's in labor with our fourth and I've finally got her laughing...
I think I've really improved the delivery!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Four surgeons
Four surgeons sit around discussing their favorite patients.
The first surgeon says, "I like operating on librarians. When you open them up, everything is in alphabetical order".
The second surgeon says, "I like operating on accountants. When you open them up, everything is in numerical order".
The third surgeon says, "I like operating on electricians. When you open them up, everything is color coded."
The fourth surgeon says, "I like operating on politicians."
The other three surgeons look at each other in disbelief.
The fourth surgeon continues, "Because they're heartless, gutless, spineless, and the a**... and head are interchangeable."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Four insurance companies are in competition.
One comes up with the slogan, "Coverage from the cradle to the grave."
The Second one tries to improve on that with, "Coverage from the w**... to the tomb."
Not to be outdone, the third one comes up with, "From the s**... to the worm."
The fourth insurance company really thought hard and almost gave up the race, but finally came up with, "From the e**... to the resurrection."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Four catholic ladies are talking about how important there sons are. (Long)
The first one tells her friends my son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father.'
The second Catholic woman chirps, while my son is a bishop, when he walks into a room, people say, 'Your Grace.'
The third Catholic woman says smugly, Well, not to put you down, but my son is a cardinal. Whenever he walks into a room, people say, 'Your Eminence.'
The fourth Catholic woman sips her coffee in silence. The first three women give her a subtle well.....?
She replies, My son is a charismatic, 6'2 , hard-bodied male stripper. Whenever he walks into a room, people say, My God.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Four little boys brag whose dad is the tallest.
The first boy says: my dad is taller than a tree!
The second boy says: my dad is taller than a mountain!
The third boy says: my dad is so tall that if he stands on the tips of his toes he can reach the stars!
The fourth boys says: and those are large?
\-Yeah.
\-Round?
\-Yeah?
\-Warm?
\-..Yeah, so?
\-...Those are my dad's b**....
A group of mathematicians walks into a bar
The bartender asks, "what can I get you guys?"
The first mathematician replies, "I'll have a beer."
The second mathematician replies, "I'll have a half of a beer."
The third replies, "I'll have a fourth of a beer."
The fourth replies, "I'll have an eighth of a beer."
And so on...
The bartender returns with two beers. Outraged, one mathematician demands to the bartender, "how do you expect us to all get drunk off of two beers!"
The bartender replies, "you guys should really know your limits!"
