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Foreman Jokes

57 foreman jokes and hilarious foreman puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about foreman that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Foreman Short Jokes

Short foreman jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The foreman humour may include short fireman jokes also.

  1. George Foreman named all his kids George Foreman. He even used the name when he had a little grill.
  2. Did you hear Muhammad Ali burnt his hand in a few fights? That's what happens when you punch George Foreman in the grill.
  3. Quarry I was walking through a quarry…I said to the foreman, "That sure is a big rock!" "Boulder," he corrected me. So I stuck out my chest and shouted, "THAT SURE IS A BIG ROCK!!"
  4. Did you hear the one about Mike Tyson, Lennox Lewis, George Foreman and floyd mayweather Jr in queue at the bank? Punchline
  5. "Hi, My name is John Foreman and I run a cabinet making business." John said counter-productively.
  6. George Foreman really likes the name George . In fact, he named all his sons George Foreman . He even used the name when he had a little grill.
  7. The foreman at my bridge construction site is always rushing things. But when I got the beams set ahead of schedule he didn't believe me. Nobody expects the span is in position.
  8. Look out for Hugh's new kitchen range! My friend Hugh Jarrs has just endorsed a new range of kitchen equipment to compete with George Foreman.
    Look out for the Hugh Jarrs Grill.
  9. Why does the foreman keep reprimanding his welding employees? He likes to test their metal.
  10. I was looking for the reason the Foreman was yelling at me. Then suddenly, it hit me like a ton of bricks.

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Foreman One Liners

Which foreman one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with foreman? I can suggest the ones about chairman and supervisor.

  1. For sale. George Foreman grill set and Mohammad Ali dvds. Both boxed.
  2. For sale. Muhammed Ali DVD set. George Foreman Grill. Both boxed.
  3. FOR SALE.... GEORGE FOREMAN GRILL.....
    MUHAMMAD ALI D.V.D'S......
    (both boxed.)
  4. What do you call a white guy surrounded by 15 Hispanic guys? Foreman.
  5. How do you beat George Foreman in a fight? Punch him in the grill
  6. George Foreman's daughter was found dead today Police are grilling suspects
  7. What do you call an interrogation of a barbecuer a George Foreman grill
  8. George foreman sells a grill, what does the iron shiek sell? Cast iron sheik skillets.
  9. What did the foreman say when a worker crashed his street paver? It's yo' asphalt
  10. Shamless self promotion makes my blood boil hotter than a George Foreman Grill ^TM
  11. What do you call a giant black woman? A George Foreman grill

Foreman joke, What do you call a giant black woman?

Laughable Foreman Jokes for Instant Grins & Giggles

What funny jokes about foreman you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean mailman jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make foreman pranks.

A weak little man applied for a job as a lumberjack...

...but the foreman refused to take him because he was too small. "I may look puny," protested the man, "but I'm not. Just give me a chance to show you my strength."
The foreman consented and told the man to go chop down a giant redwood that stood nearby. Half an hour later, to the foreman's shock, the redwood was lying on the ground.
"Where'd you learn to cut down trees like that?" the foreman asked.
"The Sahara Forest," the man answered.
"You mean the Sahara Desert?" the foreman ventured.
"Sure," said that man, "if that's what they call it now."

an Irish man was working on a building site...

...the foreman asked him to fetch a wheel barrow. A while later the Irish man returned with a wheel barrow in a wheel barrow.
The foreman said "I asked for a barrow why have you fetched two"
The Irish man replied "I needed something to carry it back in"

A black man starts work on a construction site in Liverpool.

The other workers nickname him "w**...".
Feeling upset by this, the black man goes to speak with the foreman. The foreman laughs and tells him, "But we all have nicknames. We've got m**... and p**..., they're Irish. Wac from Liverpool. And Mack from Scotland".
The black man was still not happy, so the foreman shouted at his men, "m**..., Mack, p**..., Wac leave the w**... alone!"

A man was in charge of offloading the...

...grain from the ships at the harbour. Unfortunately the grain was very moist and did not get s**... up by vacuum too easily.
He approached the foreman for some advice, who said: "If at first you don't s**... seed, try a drier grain."

So a man gets a job working as a highway stripe painter

The foreman gives the guy a paint brush and a fat bucket of paint and tells the dood where to paint and off the guy goes.
End of the first day the newbie comes back and tells the foreman he did 10 miles. "Outstanding!" The foreman says.
Second day newbie comes back to the shop at the end of the day and tells the foreman he's done 4 miles. 'Not impressive.' The foreman thinks.
End of the third day the newbie tells his foreman he did one mile. The foreman has to ask, "The first day you did 10 miles, the second day you did 4, and today you only accomplished one measly mile? What gives?"
"Well," The newbie says, "Every day the paint can gets farther and farther away.

New carpenter

It's a carpenter's first day on the job building a house. The foreman notices that he looks at each nail before driving it, and throws half of them away.
"Why are you throwing all those nails away?
"The head is on the wrong end."
"You idiot, don't throw those away! Those are for the other side of the house."

Not guilty

p**... went to trial for armed robbery.
After a long drawn out trial, the jury foreman came out and announced, "Not guilty."
"That's grand!" shouted p**.... "Does that mean I can keep the money?"

An Irish Lumberjack

A large Canadian lumber camp advertised that they were looking for a good Lumberjack. The very next day, a skinny Irishman showed up at the camp with his axe, and knocked on the Foreman's door.

The Foreman took one look at the small Irishman and told him to leave. "Just give me a chance to show you what I can do," said the Irishman.

"Okay, see that giant redwood over there?" said the Foreman. "Take your axe and go cut it down."

The Irishman headed for the tree, and in five minutes he was back knocking on the Foreman's door.

"I cut the tree down," said the Irishman.
"*Holy smokes!*" Said the Formean. "Where did you get the skill to chop down trees like that?"

"In the Sahara Forest," replied the Irishman.

Confused, the Forman asked "...don't you mean the Sahara Desert?"
"Is that what they call it now?"

A building firm hires a new Asian employee...

So the foreman tell the Asian man to go into a room and count the supplies. Having heard nothing for several hours, the foreman goes in to check the progress and can't find the man. So the Asian man jumps out from behind a shelf and yells "SUPPLIES!!"

Why did the Seven Dwarves fire Snow White as their Foreman at the mine?

They thought she was micromanaging them!

I got a new job at a quarry today, and the foreman was showing me around when

I saw this huge rock. I told him, "Wow! That's a really big rock!"
"Boulder." He says.
**"WOW!!!! THATS A REALLY MASSIVE ROCK,"** I say while puffing my chest out.

Laziest Of All

A site foreman had ten very lazy men working for him, so one day he decided to trick them into doing some work for a change.
I've got a really easy job today for the laziest one among you, he
announced. Will the laziest man please put his hand up?
Nine hands went up.
Why didn't you put your hand up? he asked the tenth man.
Too much trouble, came the reply.

A Man named McMurphy is accused of robbing a bank...

On the last day of his trial, the foreman of the jury stands up.
"Have you reached a verdict?" asked the judge.
"We have your honor..." replied the foreman. "Not guilty!"
"Excellent!" shouted McMurphy "Does that mean i get to keep the money?"

I was walking through a quarry...

and said to the foreman, "That's a big rock!"
"Boulder" he replied. So I puffed my chest out and shouted "THAT'S A BIG ROCK!"

A man is on trial for armed robbery...

The jury comes back with the verdict. The foreman stands, clear his t**... and announces, Not guilty. The defendant leaps to his feet. Awesome! he shouts. Does that mean I get to keep the money?

Why did the coal mine foreman fire the hippy who showed up for work wearing this outasight tie die shirt?

Outasight, out of mine.

"Your one and only job is to supply the miners"

The foreman told the asian man before leaving the job site.
Upon the foreman's return a week later he noticed one of the job site workers lackadaisically lounging in the sun.
"Hey Bob! How are ya? Why arent you workin boy?" said the foreman.
"Im too hungry to work. That c**... aint been around much. Been poppin up here and there but no food in sight"
The foreman continued further into the worksite and the responses were similar across the board.
Puzzled. The foreman turned the corner towards the work barracks when suddenly; out of no where the c**... jumped out from behind a barrel and yelled.
"Supplies!"

Light bulb

p**... and John are working on a building site. p**... says to John, I need a day off, I'm going to pretend I've gone mad!
p**... climbs up to the rafters, hangs upside down from them and shouts, I'm a light bulb! I'm a light bulb! While John looks on in amazement.
The foreman shouts, p**... go home, you've gone mad!
As p**... packs his kit, the foreman sees John packing his kit as well.
Foreman says, John where do you think you're going?!
John says, Well I'm not working in the friggen dark!

Workers are building a brutally tall chimney...

When they are almost finished, a foreman runs to them short of breath and shouts:
We are in deep s**... guys, someone turned over my construction plans...
We were supposed to dig a well!!!

A dog is looking for work...

He stumbles across an open construction site with a hiring sign.
The dog goes to the foreman and says he's willing to work and can start immediately. The foreman asks the dog if he has any experience with carpentry and construction.
The dog replies, "Some; I've got a lot of experience with *woofing*!"

Three men applied to put up telephone poles.

The foreman sent them each out with a truck and 20 poles, telling them to come back after 8 hours.
The first man returns and says "I put up 12 poles."
The second man returns and says "I put up 15 poles."
The third man returns and says "I put up 3 poles."
"Three?" asks the foreman. "These two guys put up nearly thirty between them and you only put up three?"
"Yeah," the third man says, "But you should see how much they left sticking out of the ground!"

The other day a girl asked me if I like b**... or thighs. I told her I prefer bubble butts and a trimmed p**... with thin lips...

So I got kicked out of KFC.

p**... & Murphy are working on a building site.

p**... and Murphy are working on a building site.
p**... says to Murphy, I'm gonna get the day off. I'm gonna pretend I've gone mad! He climbs up the rafters, hangs upside down, and shouts, I'm a lightbulb, I'm a lightbulb!
Murphy watches in amazement.
The foreman shouts: p**..., go home. You've gone mad.
So p**... leaves the site. Murphy starts packing his kit up to leave as well.
Where do you think you're going? asks the foreman.
Well, I can't work in the friggin dark! said Murphy.

A foreman of a factory was making his rounds inspecting how all of the workers were doing their jobs.

Well," he said to one blond worker, "I see you are doing a very diligent job stamping all of the boxes 'THIS SIDE UP'."
"Yes," the worker replied, eager to please, "and just to be extra sure I stamped the bottom also!"

A bunch of Russian labourers are building a fence

and one of them goes to the foreman and says "Foreman, I have a problem. I just opened this packet of nails and all the heads are on the wrong end."
"Idiot!" yells the foreman. "Those nails are for the other side of the fence!"

A lumberjack walks into the company office to get paid.

The secretary says, I have a check here for cutting down 236 trees this week.
The lumberjack replies, I actually cut down 237 trees.
Are you sure? , says the secretary, Your foreman counted 236 on the truck.
Sure, I'm sure, replies the lumberjack. I kept a log .

A rookie carpenter is on his first day of a new job...

The foreman greets him at the job site and tells him his first task will be to nail some sheathing on a roof. The rookie grabs a hammer and nails and gets to work.
The foreman watches the rookie work for a while, and when he's finished he calls him over. The foreman says, "I think your nickname in this jobsite will be 'lightning'." The rookies face lit up, and he asked, "Why's that? Am I faster than everybody else?"
The foreman shakes his head and says, "No, it's because you never strike twice in the same place ."

An Irishman goes for a labouring job on a building site

The foreman thinks to himself "I'll catch this thick p**... out" and asks the Irishman "what's the difference between a joist and a girder?"
The Irishman thinks for a second and replies "well, you see sir, Joyce wrote Ulysses while Goethe wrote Faust".

\>note, this works best as an o**... joke as u may have gathered.

Elmo gone wrong…

A new hire at Hasbro was assigned to quality control on the Tickle Me Elmo line.
After an hour, the line foreman saw the line grind to a stop. Frustrated workers are yelling, stepping away from the machines, and angrily looking towards the end of the line.
There is the new hire, furiously working with needle and thread, empty boxes and plush Elmos falling around her. The foreman goes over to see what the problem is, and finds a stack of red felt pieces and a bucket of marbles.
No, no!! I told you to give each Elmo two *test tickles!!*

Foreman joke, Elmo gone wrong…

jokes about foreman