Footwear Jokes

34 footwear jokes and hilarious footwear puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about footwear that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Footwear Short Jokes

Short footwear jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The footwear humour may include short shoes jokes also.

  1. I think my doctor really likes my choice of sensible footwear… I overheard him telling his colleague that I had, "Serious healthy shoes."
  2. How could the footwear exec afford a mansion, a yacht, and a private jet? He was on a real shoestring budget.
  3. All these what? Whenever a Jamaican women talks about "all these terrible shootings"
    I'm never sure if they mean gun violence, or footwear accessories.
  4. I was having lower back pain from having to stand all day at work and my wife suggested I try orthopedic footwear. I told her it wouldn't help but she insisted.
    I stand corrected.
  5. Hillary Clinton has become so famous that they started naming footwear after her They call it the flip flop
  6. Florida lawmaker Randall Thompson is forced to resign after it is revealed he spent taxpayer money on expensive footwear for his wife. I guess Randall mishandled his panhandle sandal scandal.
  7. What did the footwear salesmen do to get the deer away from his house? He shoe'd them away.
  8. What happened after 14-Year-Old Richie inherited his father's footwear empire? He came into a lot of socks.
  9. I was standing outside an urban footwear shop that was promoting violence. The sign said: "Kicks for sale!"
  10. What did the shoemaker say about actor Christopher's custom-made footwear? These Boots Are Made For Walken.....

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Footwear One Liners

Which footwear one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with footwear? I can suggest the ones about sandals and sneakers.

  1. A few years ago I invented beach footwear for people with one leg. It was a flop.
  2. Why does good footwear go to heaven? Because they have soles.
  3. What is Hillary Clintons favorite type of footwear? flip-flops
  4. Who chops down trees and wears corrective footwear? Paul Bunion
  5. What footwear does Hilary Clinton wear to the beach? Flip flops or scandals!
  6. What do you call electric footwear? Sockets.
  7. What do you call an octopus that wears footwear? A Socktopus
  8. What's Anakin's least favorite footwear? Sandals
  9. What kind of footwear do robbers use for sneaking around? Probably Nike or Adidas
  10. What footwear is indecisive? Flip-flops
  11. What's the stealthiest type of footwear? A sneaker.
  12. What do you call a Jamaican soccer player footwear? Blood cleats
  13. What kind of footwear do Whitewalkers use? The Hodor-eliminating kind.
  14. What's an autists favorite footwear? Reeeeeeeeeebok
  15. What's a Canadian's favorite footwear? Aboot

Footwear joke, What's a Canadian's favorite footwear?

Comical Footwear Jokes and Gems that Will Get You in Laughter Land

What funny jokes about footwear you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean running shoes jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make footwear pranks.

My wife got excited because of a delivery she received

She got a new heavy-gauge wok that she had her eye on for a while. I asked her if she remembered to get the special footwear for it.
She looked puzzled for a moment. Then she sighed and said, "Okay, lay it on me. Tell me your dad joke."
I said, "I don't know what you mean by that, but it is my understanding that they have boots that are made for wokking."

Thought I'd share a favorite on my cake day

Gandhi used to walk barefoot on most days, neglecting modern footwear, and eventually grew a strong set of callouses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather weak and with his odd diet, suffered from very, very bad breath. To others he smelled atrocious, this super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

Footwear joke, What did the footwear salesmen do to get the deer away from his house?