Food Supplies Jokes
34 food supplies jokes and hilarious food supplies puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about food supplies that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Food Supplies Short Jokes
Short food supplies jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The food supplies humour may include short food shortage jokes also.
- Fritz was planning a holiday to England but was worried that he might not like the food. He decided to take some of his own supplies with him from Bavaria, for the wurst käs scenario.
- What did the French baker say when he spilt food-colouring in his baking supplies? Sucre Bleu!
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Food Supplies One Liners
Which food supplies one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with food supplies? I can suggest the ones about grocery and farmers feed.
- how much is a life-time supply of fast food? Not much.
- Obama's going to open a home food preservation supply store next It's called "Yes We Can"
Comical Food Supplies Jokes and Gems that Will Get You in Laughter Land
What funny jokes about food supplies you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean school supplies jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make food supplies pranks.
A professor, a CEO, and a janitor are in a forest when they discover a magic fairy.
The fairy says "I will give you what you most desire if you do someone else's job for a day."
The professor says "I'll be an elementary school teacher. What can be so hard about teaching a bunch of 6-year-olds how to read?" so he is teleported into a classroom. After a few minutes, all the kids' screaming gets to his nerves, so he throws all his supplies and gives up.
The C.E.O says "I'll be a waiter. All you do is carry food back and forth. This'll be a breeze" so he is teleported to a restaurant. After about an hour, all the annoying customers drive him insane, so he smashes his plates on the ground and gives up.
The janitor says "I'll be an artist" so he is transported to an art facility. He glues all the classroom supplies and shattered plates to a canvas, then sells it for a billion dollars. The fairy asks the janitor how he was so clever.
The janitor says "I got a masters degree in art."
A Dutch, English and Chinese man wash up on an island
A Dutch, English and Chinese man survive a boat accident and wash up on an island. They need food, water and supplies to survive the night.
The Dutch guys says that he will gather the food, the English man will get water and the Chinese man is send for supplies.
When the Dutch and the English man come back with food and water the Chinese man is nowhere to be found. They wait a bit till they can't wait longer and start preparing the food.
The Dutch and English guy start eating and out of nowhere the Chinese guy jumps out the bushes and shouts: " SUPPLIES ".
I'm sitting in a jail cell
and it's killing me that I was arrested for something so s**.... On a dare, I robbed a kitchen supply store. Sure, the expensive knives would have been great, and who doesn't want a food processor?
But all in all, it just wasn't work the whisk.
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded in the desert
As they're walking the come upon a convenience store. They go inside to gather supplies for the long journey home.
The brunette says "I'll grab plenty of water so we can have enough to drink."
The redhead says "I'll grab food so we have enough to eat."
The blonde says "I'll grab a car door in case it gets hot, we can roll down the windows!"
"Your one and only job is to supply the miners"
The foreman told the asian man before leaving the job site.
Upon the foreman's return a week later he noticed one of the job site workers lackadaisically lounging in the sun.
"Hey Bob! How are ya? Why arent you workin boy?" said the foreman.
"Im too hungry to work. That c**... aint been around much. Been poppin up here and there but no food in sight"
The foreman continued further into the worksite and the responses were similar across the board.
Puzzled. The foreman turned the corner towards the work barracks when suddenly; out of no where the c**... jumped out from behind a barrel and yelled.
"Supplies!"
I don't know if this is original but my dad told this to me many years back.
A company decides to enlist a few people to help with the running of their factory, A Swiss for the time, a German for leadership, a French for the food and a Chinese for the supplies. On the first day the German walks around the factory looking at everyone and everyone is doing their jobs, he sees the Swiss and the French working but he can't find the Chinese. The second day the same thing happens, French,Swiss but no Chinese. The third day passes, then the fourth and finally on Friday he doesn't see the Chinese anywhere when suddenly the Chinese jumps from behind a machine with a cake and says SUPPLIES!
A politically incorrect joke about language
Investors want to make a holiday resort on an uninhabited island. They hire 3 experts to get life going there.
To the Frenchman they say, "you are in charge of cuisine".
To the German they say, "you are in charge of accommodation".
To the Finn they say, "you are in charge of supplies."
They come to survey in a while. The Frenchman has built a restaurant with excellent food. The German has built a fancy hotel. But the Finn is nowhere to be found. They ask the others but they don't know where he is either. So they go look for him and while walking in the woods the Finn suddenly jumps out from behind the tree and shouts, "SUPPLIES!"
Tom, Mike, and Joe survive a plane c**... and swim to a nearby island.
Mike doesn't speak English very well. Joe Immediately starts giving orders to both of them: "Tom, go and find some branches so we can start a fire, Mike, try and find supplies. I will try to find some food." So they all split up. After a few hours, Joe and Tom went back to the place they made their plan at. "I found lots of branches" said Tom. "I found some food.. Where is Mike?" asked Joe. They started looking for him when all of a sudden he jumps out of a bush and yells "SUPPLIES!"
An American, a british, and a chinese man is stranded on a desert island.
The American takes charge.
He orders the British man to take care of shelter, he himself will take care of food, and he orders the Chinese man to take care of supplies.
They all go their own ways.
The american man and the british meet up, the American with food and the British with a place to stay. They wait several days for the Chinese man without him ever showing up.
They start looking for him. They start walking through the dense forest when suddenly the Chinese man jumps up from a bush:
SUPPLIES!
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A Canadian man, an American and a Chinese man are stranded on a desert island...
The Canadian tells the others that he will be in charge of food. American volunteers to be in charge of water and the Chinese man says he will be in charge of supplies. They split up to do their jobs and decide to meet up later. When the Canadian and the American return, there is no sign of the Chinese man. Days pass by, but they still can't find their friend. One day as they are walking along a path, the Chinese man jumps from the bushes and yells "SUPPLIES!"
My dad's favorite joke
3 guys are driving through the desert when their car breaks down. They grab as much of their supplies as they can carry and start walking.
The first guy turns to the second guy and says ''I brought all our food cause you can't grow anything in the desert.''
The second guy replies ''I brought all our water cause it doesn't rain in the desert.''
The third guy is slowly trailing behind. The two guys ask ''Hey what are you doing?''
Dragging the car door behind him the third guy shouts ''In case it gets hot we can roll the window down!''
Two Christians are lost in an Arabian desert
David and Michael were going on a safari where they got lost and their car stopped working, they started wondering throughout the desert. With food and water supply almost ending and no reception anywhere they were desperately looking for help. After a very long time in the heat of the desert and almost dying from thirst they finally see a mosque far away. They start discussing among each other. David: I'll pretend my name is Mohammed so they will give me food and water! Michael: I don't care I won't change my name for food! As they go to the mosque, the Muslims rush to their aid. David says he's Mohammed and Michael says he's Michael. So the Muslims get water and food fast for Michael and as David was waiting for his turn the Muslims turn around for him and say... "You know it's Ramadan, right?"!
Two Christians are lost in a desert
David and Michael were going on a safari where they got lost and their car stopped working, they started wondering throughout the desert. With food and water supply almost ending and no reception anywhere they were desperately looking for help.
After a very long time in the heat of the desert and almost dying from thirst they finally see a mosque far away. They start discussing among each other.
David: I'll pretend I am a Muslim so they will give me food and water!
Michael: I don't care I am a proud Christian and I will not pretend to be someone else just for food.
As they go to the mosque, the Muslims rush to their aid. David says he's a Muslim and Michael says he's Christian.
So the Muslims get water and food fast for Mike and as David was waiting for his turn the Muslims turn around for him and say... "You know it's Ramadan, right"!
Donald Trump...
-A big earthquake with the strength of 8.1 on the Richter scale hits the Middle East.
-Two million Muslims die and over a million are injured.
-Iraq, Iran and Syria are totally ruined and the governments don't know where to start with providing help to rebuild.
-The rest of the world is in shock.
-Britain is sending troops to help keep the peace.
-Saudi Arabia is sending oil & monetary assistance.
-Latin American countries are sending clothing.
-New Zealand and Australia are sending sheep, cattle and food crops.
-The Asian countries are sending labor to assist in rebuilding the infrastructure.
-Canada is sending medical teams and supplies.
-President Trump, not to be outdone, is sending back two million replacement Muslims.
A big earthquake with the strength of 8.1 on the Richter scale hits the Middle East .
Two million Muslims die and over a million are injured.
Iraq, Kuwait, UAE, Saudi Arabia and Syria are totally ruined and the governments don't know where to start with providing help to rebuild.
The rest of the world is in shock.
Britain is sending troops to help keep the peace.
Saudi Arabia is sending oil & monetary assistance.
Latin American countries are sending clothing.
New Zealand and Australia are sending sheep, cattle and food crops.
The Asian countries are sending labor to assist in rebuilding the infrastructure.
Canada is sending medical teams and supplies.
President Trump, not to be outdone, is sending back two million replacement Muslims.
Island Joke
A white guy, a Mexican guy and a Chinese guy are stranded on an island. The white guy says, "okay, we need to get to work if we're going to survive. I'll hunt for food. Mexican guy, you go build us shelter. Chinese guy, you go get us some supplies. We'll meet back here at sunset."
The white guy is roasting a pig over the fire, while the Mexican guy is putting the finishing touches on the shelter. As the sun sinks into the horizon, the Mexican guy finally asks: "so... where's the Chinese guy?" Then, out of nowhere, the Chinese man jumps out of the bushes yelling, "SUPPLIES!!"
White guy, asian guy and black guy...
A white guy and asian guy and a black guy are in a plane that crashes, and they all end up on a beach on a deserted island. They devise a plan to get prepared, knowing that it could be awhile until they are found. They decide the white guy is going to find food, the black guy is going to build the shelter, and the asian guy is going to find supplies. So the white guy goes off, finds berries and bananas, comes back to find the black guy is finishing off the shelter for them to stay in. They can't find the asian guy anywhere, so they start their search. After a couple minutes and a bit of distance away from the shelter they hear rumbling in the bushes. They take a step back, scared .... and all of the sudden, the asian guy jumps out of the bushes, and yells.... SUPPLIES.
As tends to happen at the start of jokes, 5 men and a woman survive a shipwreck, and wake up on a deserted island...
...where they find everything they need to survive and live well: food, water, shelter. But being people, they have certain needs. Lovey-dovey needs.
The woman is a proper lady, though, and so they come up with a fair system. She will sleep with the first guy the first week (unlimited supply of condoms too on this heckuva-awesome island), guy #2 week 2, guy #3 week 3, guy #4 week 4, guy #5 week 5, and then start back over with guy #1 for week 6.
They all agree, and for ten straight years, they live like royalty.
But all good things must come to an end, and sadly, the girl eventually passes away.
The first week after things are fine.
Week two, things are starting to deteriorate.
It's messy by week three.
By week four, it's unpleasant by any measure.
And week 5, by week five, it's simply unbearable.
So they bury the body.
Three guys are stranded at a deserted island.
A Canadian, an American and a China man are stranded on a deserted island. The Canadian tells the others that he will be in charge of food. The American will be in charge of water and the Chinese man get the task to be in charge of supplies. They split up to do their jobs and decide to meet up later. When the Canadian and the American return, there is no sign of the Chinese man. Days pass by, but they still can't find their friend. One day as they are walking along a path, the Chinese man jumps from the bushes and yells
"SUPPLIES!"
A Spaniard, an American, and a Japanese man are approached by a billionaire.
A Spaniard, an American, and a Japanese man are approached by a billionaire. The billionaire asks them to participate in a year-long experiment wherein they will be taken to a deserted island to survive.
He assigns them each tasks according to their heritage:
The Spaniard will be in charge of food.
The American will be in charge of shelter.
And the Japanese man will be in charge of supplies.
A year passes on the island and the billionaire returns to find only the Spaniard and American left.
"What happened?! Where is the Japanese man?" he asks.
"We're not sure! As soon as we got here he took off into the forest and we haven't seen him since."
Worried for the Japanese man, they decide to search the island.
After a few minutes of walking, all of the sudden, the Japanese man leaps out from the bushes and yells, "**SUPPLIES!**"
An airplane crashes on a deserted island and only 2 men and a woman survive.
The three wait and survive for a few weeks before they realize that they aren't going to be rescued. They decide to accept their fate and start enjoying life on the island. They have plenty of food, water, and other supplies that they found around the island. Naturally they start to have urges, and they decide that the guys will take turns for when the girl is in the mood.
So life is good for a few weeks until the girl becomes fatally ill. The girl dies a week later. So the two men think about what they should do now.
Man 1: "I have an idea... But I've never done it before."
Man 2: "I know what you're thinking. I'm willing to try it..."
So every night for about 3 weeks after the girl died, the men attempt the idea and each morning both men are sore and disgusted. Finally one night:
Man 1: "STOP! We can't do this anymore! It isn't right! It's not natural!"
Man 2: "Yes, I agree... We'll bury her body in the morning."
A big earthquake hits the Middle East...
A big earthquake with the strength of 8.1 on the Richter scale hit the Middle East. Two million Muslims died and over a million were injured.
Iraq and Iran are totally ruined and the governments don't know where to start with providing help to rebuild. The rest of the world is in shock. The USA is sending troops to help. Saudi Arabia is sending oil. Latin American countries are sending Supplies. New Zealand is sending sheep, cattle and food crops. The Asian continents are sending labor to assist in rebuilding the Infrastructure. Canada is sending medical teams And supplies.
GREAT BRITAIN, not to be outdone, Is sending two million replacement Muslims.
A British guy, a French guy, and a Korean guy got stranded on an island
A British guy, a French guy, and a Korean guy got stranded on an island. The British guy decided it would be best for them to split up and meet back the next day. He told the other two that he would build a shelter, and told the French guy to gather food and the Korean guy to get supplies. The next day, the British guy had an impressive shelter built and the French guy showed up with berries and nuts, but there was no sign of the Korean guy. Days passed, and they began to get worried, so they set off in search of him. They walked through the jungle for three days without any sign of the Korean guy. Then on the fourth day, as they were about to give up hope, the Korean guy suddenly popped out from behind a rock and yelled "supplies!"
A Hispanic man, a European man, and an Asian man are put on a deserted island
They are told that they will be rescued in 24 hours, provided they have proved their survival skills.
The Hispanic man is in charge of building a shelter, the European man is in charge of finding food, and the Asian man is in charge of finding supplies.
The three men go their separate ways to complete their tasks.
24 hours later, the rescue team comes back to the island in the hopes of seeing that the three men can prove their survival skills.
The Hispanic man takes the rescue team to his shelter that he built, and the rescue team is pleased with his work.
The European man takes the rescue team to his stash of food that he has accumulated, and the rescue team is pleased with his work.
However, the Asian man with his supplies is nowhere to be found.
The rescue team walks around the island, searching for the Asian man and the supplies he was supposed to find, when suddenly the Asian man jumps out of the bushes and yells SUPPLIES!
An American, Russian, and Asian are stranded on a desert island…
… They decide in order to survive they will have to work together and plan on splitting up the day's work.
The Russian was tasked with building a hut, the American was to search for food, while the Asian was to search for supplies.
Each sets off in their separate directions.
The Russian builds an excellent hut, complete with a floor and a waterproof roof. It was sturdy and comfortable.
The American soon returns with enough food for a feast. He has handfuls of fruit, fish, shrimp, coconuts, and all enough to last for weeks.
After complimenting each others work they notice that the Asian is no where to be seen with the supplies. As the night grew on they decided it would be best to search for the man in case he had gotten into some danger.
They searched for hours through the jungle until they came to a large clearing. In the middle was a giant rock, they wonder if he had gone to collect supplies by the rock and approach it cautiously.
Once at the rock the Asian quickly jumps out, raises his hands in the air, and yells, Supplies !
An American, Russian, and Asian are stranded on a desert island...
... They decide in order to survive they will have to work together and plan on splitting up the day's work.
The Russian was tasked with building a hut, the American was to search for food, while the Asian was to search for supplies.
Each sets off in their separate directions.
The Russian builds an excellent hut, complete with a floor and a waterproof roof. It was sturdy and comfortable.
The American soon returns with enough food for a feast. He has handfuls of fruit, fish, shrimp, coconuts, and all enough to last for weeks.
After complimenting each others work they notice that the Asian is no where to be seen with the supplies. As the night grew on they decided it would be best to search for the man in case he had gotten into some danger.
They searched for hours through the jungle until they came to a large clearing. In the middle was a giant rock, they wonder if he had gone to collect supplies by the rock and approach it cautiously.
Once at the rock the Asian quickly jumps out, raises his hands in the air, and yells, "Supplies"!
A professor, a CEO, and a janitor are in a forest when they discover a magic fairy.
The fairy says I will give you what you most desire if you do someone else's job for a day.
The professor says I'll be an elementary school teacher. What can be so hard about teaching a bunch of 6-year-olds how to read? so he is teleported into a classroom. After a few minutes, all the kids' screaming gets to his nerves, so he throws all his supplies and gives up.
The C.E.O says I'll be a waiter. All you do is carry food back and forth. This'll be a breeze so he is teleported to a restaurant. After about an hour, all the annoying customers drive him insane, so he smashes his plates on the ground and gives up.
The janitor says I'll be an artist so he is transported to an art facility. He glues all the classroom supplies and shattered plates to a canvas, then sells it for a billion dollars. The fairy asks the janitor how he was so clever.
The janitor says I got a masters degree in art.
A professor, a CEO, and a janitor are in a forest when they discover a magic fairy.
The fairy says "I will give you what you most desire if you do someone else's job for a day."
The professor says "I'll be an elementary school teacher. What can be so hard about teaching a bunch of 6-year-olds how to read?" so he is teleported into a classroom. After a few minutes, all the kids' screaming gets to his nerves, so he throws all his supplies and gives up.
The C.E.O says "I'll be a waiter. All you do is carry food back and forth. This'll be a breeze" so he is teleported to a restaurant. After about an hour, all the annoying customers drive him insane, so he smashes his plates on the ground and gives up.
The janitor says "I'll be an artist" so he is transported to an art facility. He glues all the classroom supplies and shattered plates to a canvas, then sells it for a billion dollars. The fairy asks the janitor how he was so clever.
The janitor says "I got a masters degree in art."