Florist Jokes
83 florist jokes and hilarious florist puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about florist that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Florist Short Jokes
Short florist jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The florist humour may include short floral jokes also.
- Angelina Jolie walks into a florists.'I'd like to buy some flowers', she says. 'Orchids?' says the florist. 'No, just flowers today'.
- If you see a monk going door to door selling flowers in your neighborhood, call the authorities immediately. Because only YOU can prevent florist friars.
- Why can you never find a botanist in the woods? Because you can't see the florist for the trees!
- Europe is in turmoil, but at least I've got some steady income despite the migrant crisis I own a florist around the corner from the French embassy
- The Florists wife was Rose The weatherman's wife was May
The bankers wife was Penny
And the senators wife was Peggy. - Did you hear about the new Marty McFly movie... ...Where he travels back in time to become a florist? It's called Back to the Fuschia.
- Spanish Stores End in "ía" For instance, florists is florería. Lavandería is a laundromat. But what do you call Taco Bell for short?
Diarrhoea - Saw a guy come racing out of our local flower shop, arms full of random product. Then the shop owner rushed out after him. I couldn't help, so I just yelled encouragement to her: "Run, florist! Run!"
- Why did Hugh Jackman single handedly stop a Franciscan botanist from accidentally dropping a match in the forest? Because only Hugh can prevent florist friars.
- Mary One-lip searched her whole life for her one-lipped prince, until she found a handsome florist. But she could not marry him... ... For he had tulips.
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Florist One Liners
Which florist one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with florist? I can suggest the ones about flower shop and gardener.
- So, a florist gave me the wrong flowers. I think they're called oopsie daisies.
- Never buy flowers from a monk... Remember, only you can prevent florist friars.
- Never buy flowers from a monk Only YOU can prevent florist friars
- I just got fired from a florist. I took too many leaves.
- How do you kiss a florist? With tulips.
- What type of insurance does a florist provide? Wife insurance
- What did the Texan florist say when he was robbed? "What in carnation?!"
- A flower shop burst into flame... It was a florist fire.
- I got caught stealing at the florist. When the cops arrived I insisted it was a plant.
- Menacing Florists: That can be arranged.
- What does a hot tempered florist sell? Impatients
- How did the florist act after getting her dream job? Got so excited she wet her plants.
- If a tree... fell on a florist, would he make a sound?
- What do you call a disorganized florist? Out of sequins!
- A man walks into a florist. WATER THOOOOOOOOOOSE!
Silly Florist Jokes for a Good Time with Friends
What funny jokes about florist you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean botanist jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make florist pranks.
Guy takes his girlfriend to the prom...
So this guy is taking his girlfriend to the high school prom. And he's got a lot of work to do.
First he has to rent a tux, so he goes to the tuxedo store. But there's a huge tuxedo line at the store. Finally he gets out of there and realizes he has to go buy a corsage, so he goes to a florist. But there's this big long corsage line at the florist. Finally he gets the corsage and has his tux and he's gotta go rent a limo. But there's this huge line when he gets to the limo place.
Finally after waiting and making all the arrangements, it's the night of the prom. He picks her up and takes her down there to get in, but there's this huge ticket line at the door. Finally they get in and they start dancing and having fun, and she says to him, "I'm hungry," so he goes to get her some food, but there's this huge buffet line. He gets her some food and they eat and they're dancing again and she says, "Now I'm thirsty, can you get me a drink?" So he goes to get her a drink and there's no punchline.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Some friars were behind on their belfry payments...
... so they opened up a small florist shop to raise the funds.
Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of
God, the rival florist across town thought the competition
was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but
they would not. He went back and begged the friars to close.
They ignored him. He asked his mother to go and ask the
friars to get out of business. They ignored her, too.
So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest
and most vicious t**... in town, to "persuade" them to close.
Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd
be back if they didn't close shop. Terrified, the friars did so,
thereby proving that . . .
Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.
The Haircut
One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.'
The florist was pleased and left the shop.
When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door.
Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill , the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The cop was happy and left the shop.
The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a 'thank you ' card and a dozen donuts waiting for him at his door.
Then a Congressman came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I can not accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week.' The Congressman was very happy and left the shop.
The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there
were a dozen Congressmen lined up waiting for a free haircut.
There once was a humble florist living in a small town...
He would sell his beautiful flowers to the townspeople every day. One day, some friars moved into the nearby, previously empty abbey. These friars, however, grew their own beautiful flowers to sell to pay for their expenses, and these flowers were grown in such abundance and sold so much that the florist was rapidly losing money.
A man in town noticed the poor florist's distress and offered him some help. "Hey, I know a guy named Hugh that can help you out here. See that big guy over there? That's him. By tomorrow he'll have dealt with these friars' intrusive business practices."
"Alright" said the florist, "I can't thank you enough." Though he had his doubts, he tried to trust the man.
The next morning as he went to his shop he noticed the friars had already packed up their things and were long gone. He found that man and asked, "How? How did you do it??"
"Simple" he stated, "Hugh, and *only* Hugh can prevent florist friars."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An order of monks are selling flowers...
...illegally on the lawn of the p**... Mansion, Hugh Hefner's property. Instead of calling the police, however, Hugh decides to spring into action and stop them himself. After an intense argument, the monks agree to leave peacefully. If it had been anybody else they would have gotten away with it; unfortunately for them, only Hugh can prevent florist friars.
I found this story amusing.
A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom. First he goes to rent a tux, but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever.
Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there's a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers.
Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there's a large limo line at the rental office, but he's patient and gets the job done.
Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there's no punchline.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A pun from Colin Mochrie.
Some friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise the funds.
Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, the rival florists across town thought the competition was unfair. They asked the good fathers to close down, but the friars would not.
They went back and begged the friars to close. The friars ignored them.
They asked their mother to go and ask the friars to get out of business. They friars ignored them, too.
So, the rival florists hired Hugh Smith, the roughest and most vicious t**... in town, to persuad them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be back if they didn't close shop. Terrified, the friars did so, thereby proving that . . .
Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.
So two friars open a flower shop...
And since everybody wants to buy flowers from men of god, all the other florists in town go out of business. The last florist still in business goes to them and begs them to close down but they wont. After that, the rival florist goes to the friars' mothers and asks them to tell their sons to close their shop. The mothers ask, but they wont. After this, he goes and talks to Hugh. Hugh is the meanest, toughest guy in town. He beats up the friars and destroys their shop, and says he'll be back unless they close down, so they close down. Moral of the story: Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.
So this guy is taking his girlfriend to the high school prom...
So this guy is taking his girlfriend to the high school prom, and he's got a lot of work to do. First he has to rent a tux, so he goes to the tuxedo store and there's a huge tuxedo line. Eventually he rents a tux and gets out of there and realizes he has to go to the florist. once he gets there he realizes there's a huge corsage line at the florist. Eventually he gets the corsage and has to go rent a limo, but there's a huge line when he gets to the limo place. Finally, after waiting for hours and making the arrangements, it's the night of the prom. He picks up his girl and takes her to get in, but there's an enormous ticket line. once they get in the start having some fun and dancing, but she tells him I'm hungry So he goes to get her some food, but there's a huge buffet line. He gets her some food and they eat. they go back to dancing and she says Now I'm thirsty, can you get me a drink? So he goes to get her a drink and there is no punchline.
This joke is my uncle Pedro's 3rd favourite...
A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the school formal. First he goes to rent a tux, but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever.
Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there's a huge flower line there. This also takes forever, but eventually gets the flowers.
Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there's a large limo line at the rental office, but he's patient and eventually gets one.
Finally, it's the day of the school formal. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a wonderful time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there's no punchline.
A woman is opening presents at her birthday party,
and the first present she picks up is from the local florist, Max. She looks at the box and says, "I bet these are flowers" and Max nods his head. Sure enough, inside the box are flowers.
The second present she picks up is from the local candy shop owner, Molly. She looks at the box and said, "I bet this is candy" and Molly nods her head. Sure enough, inside the box is candy.
The third present she picks up is from the local liquor store owner, Joe. She looks at the box, which is leaking. " I bet this is a bottle of liquor" she says.
"Nope" says Joe.
The woman dabs some of the liquid on her finger and tastes it. "Oh, I know what this is, it's champagne!"
"No" says Joe.
The woman, frustrated, puts the box to her mouth and slurps off as much liquid as she can. "I have no idea. What did you get me, Joe?"
"A puppy."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A group of friars ...
opened a florist shop to help with their belfry payments. Everyone liked to buy flowers from the Men of God, so their
business flourished.
A rival florist became upset that his business was suffering because people felt compelled to buy from the Friars, so he asked the Friars to cut back hours or close down. The Friars refused. The florist went to them and begged that they shut down. Again, they refused.
Therefore, the florist hired Hugh McTaggert, the biggest meanest t**... in town. He went to the Friars' shop, beat them up, destroyed their flowers, trashed their shop, and said that if they did not close, he would be back. Well, very terrified, the Friars closed up shop and hid in their rooms. This proved that Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The flower shop
A man walks into a florist.
'I'd like to buy some flowers for my wife'
'Certainly sir.., and what is it your after?
s**...'
Hot girl at prom
A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom. First he goes to rent a tux, but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever.
Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there's a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers.
Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there's a large limo line at the rental office, but he's patient and gets the job done.
Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there's no punchline.
Mafia florists
Some Italian mafia members own a florist shop in a city. Theirs is the only florist is the area, and so they control most of the flower business in the area.
One day, however, another florist shop opens up across the street. Afraid for their business, the mafia send one of theirs to rustle the place up, maybe scare them off. But he comes back to report that the florists are all friars! Being devout Catholics, they can't mess with the good friars.
The mafia boss has a solution. He turns to a guy named Hugh.
"Hey Hugh, you're atheist, right?"
"Yes."
"You you'll have no qualms about shaking up that flower shop?"
"I don't see why I would, boss."
Then he puts his hand on Hugh's shoulder, turns to the rest of the group, and says,
"Only Hugh can prevent florist friars."
A boy is taking a girl to the prom...
A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to prom. First he goes to get a tux but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever.
Next, he hast to get some flowers so he goes to a florist and there is a huge flower line there. It takes forever but he gets the flowers.
Next he heads to get a limo, unfortunately there is a long limo line at the rental office and it takes a long time but he gets the job done.
Finally the day of the prom comes and the two are dancing happily and are having a good time.
When the song is over she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there is no punchline.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Friars
Some friars were behind on their belfry payments, so
they opened up a small florist shop to raise the funds.
Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of
God, the rival florist across town thought the competition
was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but
they would not. He went back and begged the friars to close.
They ignored him. He asked his mother to go and ask the
friars to get out of business. They ignored her, too.
So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest
and most vicious t**... in town, to "persuade" them to close.
Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd
be back if they didn't close shop. Terrified, the friars did so,
thereby proving that . . .
Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Wrong Flowers
A new business was opening and one of the owner's friends wanted to send him flowers for the occasion.
They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card,…. Rest in Peace.
The owner was angry and called the florist to complain.
After he had told the florist of the obvious mistake and how angry he was, the florist replied,
Sir, I'm really sorry for the mistake, but rather than getting angry, you should imagine this: Somewhere, there is a f**... taking place today, and they have flowers with a note saying,… 'Congratulations on your new location!'
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Friar Florists
The friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise funds.
Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought this was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not.
He went back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him.
So the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious t**... in town to "persuade" them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be back if they didn't close up shop.
Terrified, they did so, thereby proving that: Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.
Free Haircuts
One day, a florist went to a barber shop to get his hair cut. After the barber was finished, the florist went to pay, but the barber said, "No, this one's on the house, I'm doing the community a service this week and giving free haircuts." The next morning, the barber comes to work to find a handwritten thank you note from the florist along with a dozen roses. Later, a policeman came into get his hair cut. When the officer went to pay, the barber once again refused payment. The next morning, the barber came to work to find another thank you note along with a dozen donuts. That afternoon, a congressman came to get a haircut. Again, when the congressman attempted to pay, the barber told him there would be no charge. The following day, the barber once again arrived to a surprise at work. This time a dozen congressmen had lined up to get their free haircuts.
A catholic church needs money...
So the council gets together and decide to start selling flowers. This business works very well until the florist across the street realized he was losing all of his business. So the florist calls in his friend Hugh Hefner and asks him to go talk to the priests. After a short discussion, they realize there are other ways of making money. Weeks later, the florist's business returns and everything is back to normal. Moral of the story: Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist Friars.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Wrong Flowers
On opening his new store, a man received a bouquet of flowers. He became dismayed on reading the enclosed card, that it expressed "Deepest Sympathy". While puzzling over the message, his telephone rang. It was the florist, apologizing for having sent the wrong card.
"Oh, it's alright." said the storekeeper. "I'm a businessman and I understand how these things can happen."
"But," added the florist, "I accidentally sent your card to a f**... party."
"Well, what did it say?" ask the storekeeper.
"'Congratulations on your new location'." was the reply.
Prom Date
A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom. First he goes to rent a tux, but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever.
Next he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there's a huge line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers.
Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there's a large line at the rental office, but he's patient and gets the job done.
Finally, the day of the prom comes. There two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time.
When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and ... there's no punchline.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a black guy who sells flowers?
A florist.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Shopkeeper receives flowers at the opening of his new store...
And the card says "Rest In Peace". So he calls up the florist, angry, and she says, "Sir, at least you weren't the one who got flowers at your wife's f**... that said, 'Congratulations on the new location.'"
A Boy is taking his Girlfriend to Prom...
His mom suggests he rent a limo. He goes to the limousine agency, but there's a long limo line. Finally, after waiting patiently, he gets the limo.
His dad tells him he should get a tux. He goes to the tailor to rent a tuxedo, but there is a long tuxedo line. Finally, after waiting patiently, he gets the tuxedo.
His sister tells him to get a nice corsage. He goes to the florist to buy a corsage, but there is a long corsage line. Finally, after waiting patiently, he gets the corsage.
The big day arrives, and he and his girlfriend show up for the prom. When they get inside, she mentions she's thirsty and tells him to get her some punch. He's pleased to discover that there's no punchline.
Going to the prom
A boy asks the crush of his dreams out to prom, and she said yes! So he plans out a list of to-do before the big dance.
First he goes to rent a tux, but there is a long tux line at the shop, he waits for 20 minutes.
Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there's a huge flower line there. He waits even longer but eventually gets the flowers. Next he heads out to rent a limo.
Unfortunately, there's a large limo line at the rental office, but he's patient and gets a very nice limo.
Lastly he goes to the barber and once again there is a long line but as he sits and waits he is just dreaming how his date will look, and within no time he gets his hair cut.
Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there's no punchline.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
There was once a group of Friars
Who began selling flowers instead of cheese. They found great success in this new calling, so much they were putting a local florist shop out of business.
The local florists were angry and decided to hire thugs to intimidate the friars into ceasing their flower sales. t**... after t**..., no one was able to stop these men of God - until a man named Hugh made the friars scurry away from the town entirely!
This important story teaches us a valuable lesson: only Hugh can stop Florist Friars
but wheres the punch line?
A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom. First he goes to rent a tux, but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever.
Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there's a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers.
Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there's a large limo line at the rental office, but he's patient and gets the job done.
Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there's no punchline.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Police responded to a call outside the p**... mansion.
Mr. Hefner called the police to remove a group of monks selling daisies out of an i**... roadside stand in front of the p**... mansion. A police spokesperson released a statement "we responded promptly to Mr. Hefner's call because as everybody knows, only Hugh can prevent florist friars."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
This valentines day be sure not to buy flowers from any Monks.
Because only you can prevent florist friars!
I went to a flower shop on my way to the hospice and asked for a dozen roses...
"I'm sorry sir, " said the florist, "I only have some with a couple of days life left in them. "
"No problem, " I replied, "that's more than enough. "
A Guy and his Girlfriend
A guy was taking his girlfriend to prom. Getting ready, he went to a tux rental shop. There was a huge line but he eventually got his tuxedo.
He then went to the florist. Again, there was a huge line, but he got the orchid in the end.
Then he went to the limo rental place, and there was a big line there too! But he eventually managed to rent one.
They got to the prom and danced for a little bit, and then his girlfriend asked for some juice. He went to get it – but there was no punch line.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The ugly 40 year old florist next door is quitting her job
She wants to be deflowered
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Friars
The friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small flower shop to raise funds.
Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought this was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not.
He went back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him.
So the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious t**... in town to "persuade" them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be back if they didn't close up shop.
Terrified, they did so, thereby proving that...
Only Hugh can prevent florist friars.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a skimpy florist?
A garden h**....
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A group of friars were behind on their belfry payments.
A group of friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. He went back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him. So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious t**... in town to "persuade" them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be back if they didn't close up shop. Terrified, they did so thereby proving that only Hugh can prevent florist friars.
Going to the prom.....
A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom.
First he goes to rent a tux, but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever.
Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there's a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers.
Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there's a large limo line at the rental office, but he's patient and gets the job done.
Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there's no punchline.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What does a german bee say to a jew florist?
Ya like gas?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two friars were behind on their belfry payments.
So they opened up a small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they politely declined, He went back and begged the friars to close. They ayet again declined. So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious t**... in town to "persuade" them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be back if they didn't close up shop. Terrified, they did so, proving once and for all that Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.
Very generous barber
Is cutting a police officers hair, after that the police takes out his wallet, but barber says it's for free. The next morning barber finds dozen donuts left for him at the door.
Later that day, a florist comes, and as he is taking out his wallet, the barber says it's for free. The next morning barber finds dozen flowers left at the door.
Later that day a jew walks in, he cuts his hair, and then says it's for free.
The next morning barber finds dozen jews at the door.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A new business was opening and one of the owner's friends wanted to send him flowers for the occasion.
They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card, Rest in Peace.
The owner was angry and called the florist to complain.
After he had told the florist of the obvious mistake and how angry he was, the florist replied, Sir, I'm really sorry for the mistake, but rather than getting angry you should imagine this. Somewhere there is a f**... taking place today, and they have flowers with a note saying, 'Congratulations on your new location!'
A boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom
First he goes to rent a tux, but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever.
Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there's a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers.
Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there's a large limo line at the rental office, but he's patient and gets the job done.
At the prom, the two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there's no punchline.
A man can't decide what to get his girlfriend, a florist, for her birthday.
He goes all around town in search for a gift when he discovers a lovely garden of flowers. Because his wife loves flowers, he decides to pick out a lovely bouquet of daisies, roses and dandelions. The garden is empty and lifeless when he leaves that day.
When the day of his girlfriend's birthday arrives he gives her the handpicked bouquet of the flowers. The girl blushes and says Oh, thank you honey! These flowers are so pretty! They almost make me forget that someone destroyed my garden!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A group of friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise the funds
A group of friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise the funds.
Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, the rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious t**... in town to "persuade" them to close. Terrified, they did so - thereby proving that Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.
