Florida State Jokes
38 florida state jokes and hilarious florida state puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about florida state that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Florida State Short Jokes
Short florida state jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The florida state humour may include short florida gator jokes also.
- It's a good thing Gatorade was developed at the University of Florida as opposed to Florida State Seminole Fluid doesn't sound quite as good.
- If three Florida State football players are in the same car, who is driving? The police officer.
- The state of Florida is a navigational anomaly... The further north you go the more southern it gets.
- It's a good thing the popular sports drink was invented at Florida instead of Florida State... Because Gatorade is a much better name than Seminole Fluid .
- I'm absolutely disgusted with the state my life is in right now Florida. I live in Florida.
- Boxes of previously uncounted ballots have been found in Florida Associated Press is now declaring the State of Florida for Al Gore
- What do University of Miami, Florida State, and University of Florida football fans have in common? None attended the University of Miami.
- Why can't you compare Washington State and Florida? Because it'd be like comparing apples and oranges.
- because of current florida scandal i made joke for you. What states are corrupted?
United States
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Florida State One Liners
Which florida state one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with florida state? I can suggest the ones about university of florida and florida man.
- Florida is the sunshine state But clearly not the brightest state
- In 49 states in America, a crab shack is a restaurant. In Florida, it's a changing room.
- Florida Gators drink Gatorade Florida State Seminoles drink Seminole fluid.
- How do you get a Florida State graduate off your front porch?
Pay for the pizza. - What state has the biggest rate of aggressive public beggars? Florida
- What did Florida's state flower say to California's state flower? Aye Papi!
- Even though Florida chose to be a red state.. They became a blue state one way or another
- Email Rick Scott, the honorable governor of the state of Florida, right here.
Cheerful Fun Florida State Jokes to Brighten Your Day with Humor and Joy
What funny jokes about florida state you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean florida hurricane jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make florida state pranks.
Gatorades competition.
Upon the inception of Gatorade at the University of Florida, and the strides the teams were making on the field, Florida State University *also* tried to make their own energy drink for student athletes.
Unfortunately no one wanted to drink the "*Seminole Fluid*"...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
It's a good thing Gatorade was invented at the University of Florida and not Florida State University.
Because then it would be Seminole fluid.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What does the Florida State football team and a Florida State cheerleader have in common?
They both s**... for four quarters.
At this mornings press conference, Ron Desantis announced that the state of Florida will be outlawing the consumption and distribution of coffee.
He went on to condemn the beverage as a tool of the WOKE agenda.
The Original sports drink.
Despite What The University of Florida Claims about Gatorade being the first sports drink Florida State Football had the first energy drink. They have been drinking Seminole Fluid for years.
Jameis Winston and the Ducks
When Florida State got down early, my brother, who was rooting for FSU, said Jameis Winston had the Ducks right where he wanted them.
Considering the Ducks were sober and on top, I respectfully disagreed.
Side note:
I can't take credit for this. Was found on Deadspin.
A man called, furious about an Orlando, Florida, vacation package we had booked for him:
He was expecting an ocean-view hotel room.
I explained that was not possible since Orlando is in the middle of the state.
"Don't lie to me," he said. "I looked on the map, and Florida is a very thin state."
A young lady in New Orleans is having her 16th birthday party...
A young lady in New Orleans is having her 16th birthday party when she runs up to her uncle and firmly tells him: "When you gonna take me to Florida or don't you remember your promise?" Her uncle seem a little confused, and as he gazed down at her quizzically, and a twinkle in his eyes and stated- "I never said I was going to take you to Florida" The young lass, shocked he didn't remember said- " Yes you did. You said when I turn 16, you were going to Tampa with me."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Topical Jokes for 2/8
A company in Denver has created a dating app that connects fellow p**... smokers. The app is great because even if you don't like the person you meet, sparks are gonna fly.
In Florida, a woman who didn't know she was pregnant set a state record by giving birth to a 14 pound baby. The woman realized she was pregnant when the 14 pound baby started k**..., and cracked three of her ribs.
Researchers have developed a smartphone app that lets you test yourself for STDs. The app can be a bit confusing to use at first, especially if you've never seen the You've Got AIDS emoji.
The Jewelery Store
A balding, white haired man from Chebacco Lake in Florida, walked into a jewelry store this past Friday evening with a beautiful much younger gal at his side. He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend. The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring.
The man said, "No, I'd like to see something more special."
At that statement, the jeweler went to his special stock and brought another ring over.
"Here's a stunning ring at only $40,000." the jeweler said. The lady's eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement.
The old man seeing this said, "We'll take it."
The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the man stated, "By check. I know you need to make sure my check is good, so I'll write it now and you can call the bank Monday to verify the funds and
I'll pick the ring up Monday afternoon."
On Monday morning, the jeweler angrily phoned the old man
and said "There's no money in that account!"
'I know, said the old man, but let me tell you about MY GREAT WEEKEND!'
First Jewish President
The first Jewish president becomes elected in the United States. After a couple months in office, he decides to fly his mother up for a visit from her retirement home in Florida.
A limo arrives at the mother's door to pick her up, and she is driven to the airport where Air Force One is waiting to fly her straight to Washington DC. Another limo picks her up from the D.C. airport, taking her to the White House.
The gatekeeper at the White House, not knowing whom the guest is, exclaims to the mother, "Wow! you must know somebody very important to get special treatment like this!"
"Well of course", the mother replies, "the president is brother to my son, the Doctor!"
"Have a good day, sir"
He got his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-75, pushing the pedal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw the highway patrol behind him, blue lights
flashing and siren blaring.
He floored it to 100mph, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought, "What am I doing? I'm too old for this," and pulled over to await the Trooper's arrival.
Pulling in behind him, the Trooper walked up to the Corvette, looked at his watch and said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes.
Today is Friday.
If you can give me a reason for speeding that I've never heard before, I'll let you go."
The old gentleman paused. Then said, "Years ago, my wife ran off with a Florida State Trooper. I thought you were bringing her back."
"Have a good day, Sir," replied the Trooper
The speeder
A Florida senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership.
Taking off down the road, he pushed it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-75, pushing the pedal even more.
Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a Florida State Trooper, blue lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought, "What am I doing? I'm too old for this!" and pulled over to await the trooper's arrival.
Pulling in behind him, the trooper got out of his vehicle and walked up to the Corvette. He looked at his watch, then said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is Friday. If you can give me a new reason for speeding--a reason I've never before heard--I'll let you go."
The old gentleman paused then said: "Three years ago, my wife ran off with a Florida State Trooper. I thought you were bringing her back."
"Have a good day, Sir," replied the trooper
