Uplifting Florence Jokes to have Hilarious Fun with Friends
How is Hurricane Florence like my ex wife?
They start off wet and wild but in the end, they take your house.
I proposed to my wife while in Florence...
... I can't say either of them were particularly impressed.
Because the Hurricane Made Landfall at Night...
...does that make it Florence Night-in Gale?
I did the math on Hurricane Florence rain fall...
There is predicted to be 17 Trillion gallons of rain falling from Florence.
The width of a milk jug is 5.5"
Rain x Width = 93 Trillion inches
93 Trillion divided by 12 gets you 7,791,6**...,6**...,6**... Feet
Divided by 5280
1,475,694,444 Miles
Divided by 93,000,000 miles to get Astronomical Units
You get 15.8 AU's.
You're so fat, that even though Florence is dropping 17 trillion gallons of rain, It's still not enough to get to Uranus.
Did you hear about a guy who collected memorabilia of Rosa Parks, Florence Nightingale, Joan of Arc, and Wonder Woman?
Apparently, he was a heroine addict.
I told my coworker that Florence is tremendously big and tremendously wet
He demanded I stop sleeping with his wife
I asked my Hindu friend whether he plans to evacuate for Hurricane Florence.
He said, Na-ama-ste.
Son: Dad, why is my sister's name Florence?
Dad: Because we conceived her in Florence, Italy.
Son: I guess that's a nice way of naming your kids.
Dad: Yeah, Backseat, it is.
If Michael Sheen has a daughter he should name her Florence.
And her middle name? Andthema.
What was the governor of North Carolina criticized for responding to Hurricane Florence so quickly?
Because women don't like p**... evacuations
So the hurricane Florence has gone from a cat 5 to a cat 2
I guess you could say it was...
overblown
You can explore florence named reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean florence orleans dad jokes. There are also florence puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Florence+The Machine replaced one of their members with a former Portuguese footballer.
They are now called Florence+The Maniche.
Something light in light of Hurricane Florence
Q: What do corals get stressed about?
A: Current events
How does an old man prepare for Florence when he's in a pinch?
He grabs his hurry cane and leaves.
In the wake of Hurricane Florence, residents of North Carolina are returning home to deal with flood damage, mold, and apparently with the arrival of the President...
Tiny mushrooms.
Hurricane Florence
White House advisor.......
"Mr Trump , Hurricane Florence is causing trouble."
President Trump.....
"Offer her the same deal as Stormy Daniels!"
Nicked from fb
Why is it super hard to sneak up on a hurricane?
Because they're always turning around. Be safe with Florence.
A son to his dad
Son - why did you name my sister florence.
Dad - because we conceived her in florence.
Son - Thanks dad for telling me.
Dad - It's okay backseat.
Humm
If the hurricane picks up a car, what do you call it?
Florence and the Machine!
Secretary walks into the President's room
Secretary: Mr.President, Hurricane Florence is causing trouble.
Trump: Offer her the same deal as Stormy Daniels.
I feel bad for everyone in Florence, South Carolina.
This hurricanes got their name on it.
Convo at work today hurt my feelings
Coworker: Now Florence, that's my kind of girl. (He's referring to the hurricane)
Me: I hear dating her is a breeze
Coworker: go away
What do Florence Henderson and Alan Thicke want for Christmas?
Betty White!
Florence
"Dad, why'd you and mom named my little sister 'Florence'?" - "Because we made her in Florence, my son." - "Thanks, dad." - "No problem, Rear Seat."
This summer, while visiting Europe, I had a blast in Florence.
She seemed to enjoy herself too.
