The Best 90 Flip Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Flip jokes. There are some flip upside jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these flip flip wilson puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 Funniest Flip Jokes and Puns
My favourite sex position is called "WOW" ...
It's where I flip your MOM over
My wife shouted upstairs, The sun's just come out.
I thought great, threw on some shorts and flip flops and shot down the stairs.
I was rather shocked when I got down to find my son holding hands with his mate Michael.
How do you fit 4 gays on one barstool?
Flip it over!
How do you fit four girls on a bar stool?
Flip it over.
4 gay guys walk into a bar...
They find that there is only one barstool, the ponder for a second, until one says, "why don't we just flip it over?"
(Sorry if its a repost)
Little Timmy and his father are walking in the park
Little Timmy and his father are walking in the park. Timmy sees two dogs humping, and says, "Dad, what are they doing?" His father looks and says, "Oh, they're making a puppy."
Later that night, Timmy walks into his parents' room and sees mom and dad going at it, and says "Dad, what are you doing??" His Dad says, "Oh, we're making you a baby brother." Timmy says, "Well flip her over, I'd rather have a puppy"
What do you call it when you do a skateboarding trick over your parent's genitals?
A Freudian Flip.
My wife shouted upstairs, "the sun's just come out."
My wife shouted upstairs, "the sun's just come out." I thought great, threw on some shorts and flip flops and shot down the stairs. I was rather shocked when I got down to find our lad holding hands with his mate Michael.
Bad pun alert.
I've been watching behind the scenes reels of movies for quite a few years so the magic of movies is somewhat lost on me. I'll know how that car flip was achieved, how they choreographed fight scenes etc.
Still, watching Gravity this weekend I couldn't help but think, "how on Earth did they do that?"
I would rather have a puppy!!
A little boy and his dad are walking down the street when they see two dogs having sex. The little boy asks his father, "Daddy, what are they doing?"
The father says, "Making a puppy. "
So they walk on and go home.
A few days later, the little boy walks in on his parents having sex. The little boy says, "Daddy, what are you doing?"
The father replies, "Making a baby."
The little boy says, "Well, flip her around! I'd rather have a puppy instead ! "
What do you get when you flip a blonde up-side-down?
A brunette with shrimp-breath.
You can explore flip minty reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean flip flipper dad jokes. There are also flip puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
What did the memory say to the processor?
If you apply a voltage to me, I'm going to flip a bit!
How do you fit four gays on one stool?
Flip it upside-down.
(sorry in advance)
sex ed
One day a little boy was at the park with his grandfather when he saw two dogs having sex. He asked what they were doing and was told that was how they made puppies. Later that night he had a bad dream and when he went in to his parents' room he saw them having sex. When he asked what they were doing he was told they were trying to make him a baby brother or sister. Disgusted, he demanded "Well flip her over, I'd rather have a puppy!"
What's the maximum velocity while having sex?
68, cause at 69 you flip over
What did one pancake say to the others as it was tossed off the griddle into the air?
See you on the flip side.
I took my skateboard around my friend's house.
"Wanna see me kickflip?" I asked.
"No..." he sighed.
He really regrets naming his dog "Flip".
How many gay guys does it take to flip a car?
We'll find out when the cubs win the World Series
Hillary Clinton has become so famous that they started naming footwear after her
They call it the flip flop
What footwear does Hilary Clinton wear to the beach?
Flip flops or scandals!
Did you know that you can fit any boat on your head like a hat, if you flip it over?
That makes it cap sized
What did the pigeon say after its friend landed a sick flip?
Coo.
How do you keep a blonde busy?
Put "flip" on both sides of a piece of paper
If one more person asks me to do a summersault....
.......I swear I'm going to flip!!!
What's the speed limit of sex?
68, because if you go 69 you'll flip over and eat it.
I decided to have scrambled eggs this morning...
Immediately after thinking "I'll just flip this omelette."
what do apples, dish washer soap, the muppets, a black guy, beer, yankee candels, and the keyboard on a flip phone all have in common?
they all help make a really convoluted joke.
I treat my wife the same way I treat a bottle of ketchup...
I always take the top off, flip it upside down, and hit it has hard as I can.
I rang my telecom provider.
Before I got through , I had to say "Jump through the hoop! Do a flip!"
They said my call may be recorded for training porpoises.
Why don't dairy farmers wear flip flops?
Because they lactose.
How do you trigger a switch?
Flip it off.
I threw my sandal at the light switch to turn it off, but I missed..
It was a complete flip - flop
I don't get football....
At the beginning of the game, they flip a quarter to see who kicks off first. Then the rest of the game everybody just keeps trying to "get the quarter back". I mean, it's just a quarter, what's the big deal!?!
When the creator of USB drive will die, they'll lower his coffin into the ground..
..take it out, flip it over and lower again.
None of my friends seem to care that I'm lactose intolerant
But tell them I'm racist and they all flip out.
Pickup line: If I flip a coin....
What are the chances of me getting head? ( Ν‘Β° ΝΚ Ν‘Β°)
How fast can a woman drive?
68 mph, because at 69 they flip over and blow a rod
I was flipping through my TV Guide and I saw a show called "Die Kardashians". I thought I had found a new favorite TV show...
Then I realized the channel was in German.
If I ever get fat...
I'm gonna post before and after photos on the internet. I'll just flip them, so everyone tells me how amazing I used to look.
Yo mama's so fat
she went out in high heels and came back in flip flops
My favorite sex position is the WOW
That's when I flip your MOM over.
Whenever I'm out drinking I flip a coin
If it lands on heads, I get another drink, if it lands on tails, I flip the coin again
Why don't cows wear flip flops?
They lactose.
I flipped a quarter
I told my girlfriend to call it. She clapped her hands and said, "come here Quarter!"
Why is sex limited to 68mph?
At 69 you flip over and blow a rod.
USB Inventor
When the inventor of the usb dies thay will lower him slowly stop flip the Casket and put him in all the way
There were five distinctive wet little thuds against the garden fence....
That told me mowing the lawn in my flip flops may not have been a great idea.
A man and his young son are walking through a park
where they see two dogs having sex. The son asks, "What are they doing?" The man says with some embarrassment, "Those dogs are making puppies."
The next week the son enters his parents room while they are having sex. The son says, "Dad, what are you doing to mom?" He embarrassingly responds, "We're making babies." The son replies, "Flip her over, I want puppies instead."
You know you can fit any boat on your head
Just flip it upside down. That makes it capsized
My favorite Sex Position!
It's called WOW!
You might have not heard about that one before.....
Yeah it's where i flip your MOM over!
Flip-flops are okay
But shoes help out in the long run
Yo mama so fat
She left the house in high heels and came back with flip flops
I tried making a steak and cheese omelette but I messed up the flip...
I guess you can say that I beefed the eggsecution.
What will happen when the Earth's magnetic poles flip?
I dunno, but I heard Santa's been interviewing penguins to see if they can pull a sleigh.
What do you get when you flip off a blind man, and cuss out a deaf man?
Fired from your nursing job.
A girl with 2 left feet goes into a shoe shop...
and asks for a pair of flip flips
You see son, grilling a good steak is a lot like you mom...
Once it starts bleeding, it's time to flip her over to the brown side.
What does an indecisive person wear?
Flip Flops.
A friend and I wanted to get a hooker, but we could only afford one hand job so we had to flip a coin...
Luckily I won the toss...
A man and his son are walking through the park NSFW
They see two dogs having sex. "What are they doing?" asked the kid. Not wanting to lie the father says "They are making puppies." Later that night the son walks into the bedroom where his parents are having sex. The son asks "what are you doing?". Not wanting to lie the dad says "making babies." The sons says "flip her over I want a puppy."
Manafort and Cohen flip on the President. Trump is convicted of treason. He is 'hung by the neck until dead.' Miraculously, minutes after his hanging, he walks out of the gallows and addresses the press:
"Fake noose, folks."
Sapnu puas
Flip your phone.
I have a special trick for getting the result I want in a coin flip
It's not perfect, but it works about 50% of the time.
If somebody offered me a coin flip to either get 10 million dollars or instantly die, I'd accept in a heartbeat. A 50 percent chance to solve all my problems would be amazing!
And even if I lost the flip, I'd still get some money.
I haven't had sex in so long
sometimes I go for a run in flip flops to remember what it sounds like.
(adult) What's the max Top Speed a girl can have sex?
68mph.
Because any faster she'll flip over and blow a rod.
*Wonder how many "hi my name is rod" replies..
So my friend asked me for advice on things he could do to turn on his girlfriend.
I replied make sure you replace her batteries, and flip the switch to the left.
Day 284 without sex...
Went jogging in flip flops just to remember the sound
Day 267 without sex..
I just took a run in flip flops to hear what it sounds like again.
Day 240 without sex:
Jogged around the house wearing my flip flops so that I could at least hear the sound.
There was a monk helping make breakfast for the monastery,
and remembered you dont have to use a spatula to flip pancakes. Next thing he knew it was out of the frying pan and onto the friar.
Me: *flips pillow to the cold side*
Everyone else at the funeral- :0
A man with 2 left feet goes to a Shoe Store
βHi, do you have flip flips?
The speed limit of sex is 68 mph.
At 69 you flip over and blow a rod.
My girlfriend asked me what's my favourite sex position?
I said "WOW"
The whole day she searched for it and finally asked me what's WOW
That's when I said "It's where i flip your 'MOM' over"
My favourite sex position is called "WOW"...
Its when I flip your MOM.
What did the man with two left feet wear?
Flip flips.
do you know how much of a virgin i am?
even when I flip a coin it wouldn't give me head
My teenage daughter can't decide whether she wants to be a hairdresser or a short story writer...
I guess she'll have to flip a coin....
Heads or Tales.
I bought a used Lamborghini cheap with hopes of making a quick buck. My friend offered to flip it for me.
He was as good as his word. The funeral is Thursday.
What do you call two left sandals?
Flip flips
Why scuba divers always flip backwards when jumping from boat in water?
Because if they flip forward they would still be in boat.
Sure, I might flip over a table in an argument, but I'd never tip over a bookcase.
I have too much shelf respect.
What is the funniest time of day?
7:07 because when you flip it upside down, it says LOL!
This joke was invented by my 8 year old daughter so be nice please :)
A man with two left feet enters a shoe shop
He asks: "Excuse me, do you have flip flips?"
Did you know when you flip a canoe over you can wear it as a hat?
It's cap-sized
All you can drink for a dime (an old Flip Wilson joke)
A kid sets up a lemonade stand in front of his house, with a sign that says, All you can drink for a dime.
Before too long, a man happens by, sees the sign, and thinks it's a good deal. He gives the kid a dime and the kid hands him a cup.
The man tosses it back and says, Hey, that was pretty good. I'll have another.
The kid says, That'll be another dime.
Now wait a minute, says the man, your sign says 'all I can drink for a dime.'
But you just had a cup, didn't you? asked the kid.
Yeah.
Well, that's all you can drink for a dime.
I'm so poorβ¦.
That when people see me walking down the street with only one flip-flop on they say to me yo Juan you lost a flip flop and I say no I didn't, I found one!
How do you make an apple turnover?
You flip it!
Sean Connery had his dog trained
He got the dog to do all kinds of tricks. Roll over, do a flip, fetch certain items, but anytime he tried to get the dog to sit, it would defecate on the floor.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the flip cartwheel jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working flip kickflip piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.