Flea Jokes

Funniest Flea Short Jokes

Short flea jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The flea humour may include short flee jokes also.

1. What's the difference between a coyote and a flea? One howls on the prairie; the other prowls on the hairy.
2. A crocodile and a dog meet. The croc looks at the dog with disdain and says: "Hey, flea bag!"
   The dog looks back at the croc and says: "Hey, hand bag!"
3. How can a flea jump higher than the Empire State Building? The Empire State Building can't jump.
4. I went to a gay bar called The Flea Market. I guess one man's junk really is another man's treasure.
5. I bought a used universal remote at a flea market The volume down button was broken but it only cost a nickel.... I couldn't turn it down.
6. Tongue Twister A flea and a fly flew up in a flue. Said the flea, "Let us fly!" Said the fly, "Let us flee!" So they flew through a flaw in the flue.
7. What's the difference between a penalty shot in basketball, and a tiny curly wig designed for a bug? One is a free throw, and the other is a flea 'fro.
8. Two fleas are on Robinson Crusoe's back. One turns to the other and says, "Well, so long, I'll see you on Friday."
9. The bad news: I took the wrong medication today. The good news: For the next 3 months I'm protected against heartworms and fleas.
10. did you hear about the time they strapped a Timex watch on an old, flea-bitten dog to see what would happen? The watch kept ticking, the ticks kept watching.

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Flea One Liners

Which flea one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with flea? I can suggest the ones about bed bugs and mosquito.

1. How do you build a flea circus? You have to start from scratch.
2. Where do dogs hate shopping at? The flea market.
3. How do fleas travel? They itch-hike
4. How do you get rid of fleas? You talk to them politely,
   "Fleas go away"
5. What do you call a rabbit with fleas? Bugs Bunny...
   Happy Easter
6. Why should a man never bang his best friend? He'll probably catch fleas
7. Did you hear about the dog who went to the flea circus? He stole the show.
8. I present to you the world's shortest poem, entitled "Fleas". Adam had'em.
9. What protest by a group of dogs occurred in 1773? The Boston Flea Party!
10. Saw an offer up at a pet shop selling unwashed dogs 'Buy one get one flea'
11. What is a dog's favorite Christmas song? Fleas Navidad
12. What did one flea say to another flea? Should we walk or take a dog.
13. What do you call a tiny bug that infests Egyptian dogs and bites them? Flea-o-patra
14. Why are flea markets the most exciting shopping experience? Because they are in tents.
15. I took my dog to the vet for fleas. But they wouldn't give him any.

Flea Market Jokes

Here is a list of funny flea market jokes and even better flea market puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• How do you know when you partied too hard last night at the drive-in movies? You wake up in a flea market.
• I used to go to the flea market with 3 dollars and bring home pants, shirts, a game boy and even an old fancy chair until they put cameras all over the place
• What's the best place to buy a bass guitar? A Flea market.
• What do you call a music store that sells bass guitars for insects? A Flea Market.

Flea And Tick Jokes

Here is a list of funny flea and tick jokes and even better flea and tick puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• If your dog has fleas and you hear ticks, what should you do? Make a vet appointment for both of you.

Cheeky Flea Jokes that Will Make You and Your Friends Chuckle

What funny jokes about flea you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean midge jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make flea pranks.