Fishin Jokes
52 fishin jokes and hilarious fishin puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about fishin that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Share These Fishin Jokes With Friends
Howlingly Hilarious Fishin Jokes for All Ages to Enjoy
What is a good fishin joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
I like to go fishing from time to time...
Just for the halibut.
A Fishing Tale
On the shore of the Indian Ocean a raggedy Indian fisherman lay dozing with a hat over his face. Beside him two fishing lines were stuck into the sand.
Up comes an American.
'What are you sleeping for?' says the American. 'You'd be better off catching fish.'
'What for?' asks the fisherman.
'What do you mean, what for? You'd catch some fish, you'd sell them and with the money you'd buy yourself a trawler.
The trawler would catch even more fish. You'd sell it and buy yourself an even bigger boat. You'd catch still more fish. You'd sell it.
Then you'd build yourself a fish processing factory . . . and get rich.
And then you could lie on the beach and sleep.'
The fisherman pulled his hat even further down over his face.
'But that's what I'm doing now.'
fishing by the river
A man and his friend were fishing by the river when a f**... procession approached. The man stood up, took off his hat, and waited for the procession to pass, and sat back down. His friend said,"That was very respectful of you, very nice." The man then replied,"Well we were married for 40 years."
The fishing trip
So four high school friends have gone fishing together every year for the last two decades. That was until this year, when Jim had to inform the group he couldn't make it.
"Look, it's the wife. She's been saying I haven't been spending enough time with her."
Of course, the others were upset but told him they couldn't rearrange all the schedules to make it work out this year, so they stuck to the date.
The morning of trip, the guys are unloading on the dock when Jim comes running up with his stuff.
"What's the deal, Jim?" asked one of the fishermen.
"So I came home from work last night and I found my wife in the bedroom. She was laying down with a spool of rope, some duct tape and a ball-gag, and told me how she's been reading *50 Shades of Grey*. She told me to tie her up and do anything I want. So, uhh, here I am!"
Fishing secret
A guy is out ice fishing and he hasn't had a bite in hours, but the fellow next to him is pulling in fish after fish. Exasperated, the man finally approached the successful fisherman to find his secret.
"What's your secret buddy, I mean you've been pulling in fish left and right all day long."
"Ooo gahh takee darmns orm" the guy says.
"What??"
"Ooo gahh takee darmns orm"
"I'm sorry, I just can't understand you."
"Oh...," he says and spits something in his hand.
"You've got to keep the worms warm."
Fishing
There is a fine line between fishing, and just standing on the shore looking like an idiot
Gone Fishing.
This guy came home from work and said to his wife, "I need a vacation. I'm too stressed out. I think I'll go fishing for the weekend."
"Okay," she says. "I'll pack for you."
So she packs for him and he goes away for the weekend. When he comes back he says, "Wow, I feel a lot better now!"
"How did I pack?" the wife asks.
"You did fine, except you forgot my pajamas," he replies.
"No I didn't," she says. "I didn't have enough room in your bag so I put them in your tackle box."
Who's better at fishing; bears, or polish people?
They're pretty even. Polish people hear they're supposed to use a pole, so much like a bear, they jump in the water and wave their hands all around.
Why is fishing dangerous?
Sometimes, there's a catch
I went fishing but didn't catch any fish
It was a failure.
I got a fishing pole for my wife
I thought it was a pretty good trade.
fishing is like girls
Neither care about size when they're sleeping
Fishing Joke
Do you know the difference between a hunter and a fisherman? A hunter lies in wait. A fisherman waits and lies.
Fishing... It's like s**....
The less you get the more you lie.
Why can't you go fishing with Skrillex?
Because he always drops the bass.
I went fishing with Skrillex once.
We had to go home early though, he kept dropping the bass.
I went fishing with Skrillex once
It didn't end well, he kept dropping the bass
Went fishing for the first time yesterday
I reelly enjoyed it and now I'm hooked
I used to go fishing with Skrillex
but he kept dropping the bass.
I went fishing and caught a bass, a catfish and a hammerfer.
What's a hammerfer? Fer driving nails.
My 8year old friend thinks this is the greatest joke, I thought so too when I was his age.
I was out fishing on the lake with my dad yesterday. When we were ready to call it a day my dad goes to start up the motor and it doesn't work.
Dad: "Looks like we're gonna have to row back to the bank. Pass me one of those paddles."
Me: "Which one?"
Dad: "Either oar."
I went fishing recently and caught a 20lb sea bass. I tried to mount it
But I was arrested for indecent exposure.
Share These Fishin Jokes With Friends
Fishin One Liners
Which fishin one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with fishin? I can suggest the ones about docks and pier.
- What do you call hunting for fish in Chernobyl? Nuclear fishin'.
- Two atoms come back after fishin' But they don't come back after fusion.
- A man went fishin and tied a nintendo console to his line classic bait'n Switch
- I'm fishin' and drinkin' tonight. My daughter's fish died.
- What do you call a radioactive Angler? Nuclear fishin'
