Firstly Jokes
9 firstly jokes and hilarious firstly puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about firstly that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Uproarious Firstly Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time
What is a good firstly joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
A politicians promise
A politician visited a village and asked what their needs were.
We have 2 basic needs sir, replied the villager.
Firstly, we have a hospital, but there's no doctor.
On hearing this, politician whipped out his cellphone, and after speaking for a while he reassured the village leader that the doctor would be there the next day. He then asked about the second problem.
Secondly sir, there is no cellphone coverage anywhere in this village.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A black man get lost in a desert and finds a genie's lamp.
The genie tells him he has 3 wishes and can be granted anything but more wishes. The man ponders for a while and says " ok I got it" . " firstly I wish to never run out of water, second I wish to be white, and third of all I wish I got a lot of a**...". The genie tell him " this I can do" and grants all three of the mans wishes at once . he then tells the man "you are now white, will never run out of water, and will get tons of a**... everyday. I've turned you into a toilet"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man and his son are sitting, n**..., on a couch...
... and the little boy asks, "Dad why are our p**... different?"
The father replies, "Firstly, son, you don't have an e**...."
I asked my old dad how he was going to spend the day ?
"Well firstly your mother and I are going to pick up our prescription glasses, then we'll see !"
A few bananas are planning a heist
Right before they leap into action, they decide to run through the process again so all bananas know what they're doing.
Firstly, two bananas will be creating a distraction a distance away from the heist. Then, the rest of the bananas will scatter to confuse the enemy and start the heist.
After going through the process a few more times, the bananas are certain that they know what to do, and thus a couple bananas peel off and the rest of the bananas split.
There are three kinds of people: Firstly the ones who shower, secondly the ones who takes baths
and thirdly the ones who sit next to me on the bus.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A drunk guy goes up to a lady dressed in black
A drunk guy goes up to a lady dressed in black and says:
- Will you dance with me, lady?
- No and for three reasons.
- And what are the reasons?
With a very serious look on her face she says:
- Firstly you're drunk in a f**..., secondly you don't dance during the Nacional anthem and lastly I'm not a lady, I'm the priest.
A Chinese couple had their first baby
They named him "Firstly"
A old man goes to the doctor for some tests
...and the doctor has some bad news.
"I'm sorry to tell you this. But two of your tests cam back positive. Firstly, we have detected a cancerous tumor in your lungs."
"Oh dear!" said the man.
"And secondly," the doctor said, "it seems you have tested positive for Alzheimer's disease. I'm very sorry."
The man replied, "That sounds serious! Well, on the bright side, at least I don't have cancer!"
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