The Best 42 Firefighters Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Firefighters jokes. There are some firefighters extinguish jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these firefighters volunteer firefighter puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Firefighters Jokes and Puns

Did you know that smothering is the most immediate form of fire relief?

Yo mommas so fat, she might just be what firefighters need to stop the Gettysburg fire in California.

A little girl lives next to a fire house...

She admires the fire fighters so much she makes her own firetruck. It consists of her wagon, with the team of her cat in front with a string tied to his testicles, and her dog which lacks the testicular string, however has a harness and reins for her to lead him with. The firefighters see it, and have to ask why the string on the cat. She replies "I need a siren too."

Why are the majority of firefighters men?

They've been training with fluid launching cannons since the day they were born.

I'll show myself out.

Firefighters joke, Why are the majority of firefighters men?

What do you call two mexican firefighters?

Hose A and Hose B.

If a firefighters business can go up in smoke, and a plumbers business can go down the drain,.....

Can a hooker get laid off?


The firefighters dog

A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmation dog. The children started discussing what the dog's duties might be.

"They use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster.

"No," said another, "he's just for good luck."

A third child concluded. "No silly, they use the dogs to find the fire hydrant!"

Let's play firefighters

Boy: Let's play Firefighters!

Girl: I don't know this game, how do you play it?

Boy: Well, I will place my hand on your legs and then I run my hand up your legs and you say redlight when you want me to stop.

Girl: Alright, let's do it.

...

Girl: Red light!

Boy: Firefighters doesn't stop at red light.

Firefighters joke, Let's play firefighters

Why are mexicans bad firefighters?

Because they cant tell jose from hose B

An engineer, a doctor and a priest are playing golf

There is an old joke about an engineer, a priest, and a doctor enjoying a round of golf. Ahead of them is a group playing so slowly and inexpertly that in frustration the three ask the greenkeeper for an explanation. That's a group of blind firefighters, they are told. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse last year, so we let them play for free.

The priest says, I will say a prayer for them tonight.

The doctor says, Let me ask my ophthalmologist colleagues if anything can be done for them.

And the engineer says, Why can't they play at night?"

I'm getting a little tired of these people coming to my door telling me I need to be "saved" or "I'll burn"...

Stupid firefighters.

My friend got jailed 6 months for pulling 4 people out of a burning building.

Turns out they were firefighters.

You can explore firefighters paramedic reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean firefighters wildfire dad jokes. There are also firefighters puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


My friend got sent to prison for pulling out 3 people from a burning building

Unfortunately, it turned out they were firefighters

Why are Mexicans bad firefighters?

Because they can't tell the difference between JosΓ© and hose B

My cooking is so great....

...that firefighters like to come and watch.

A bar is burning to the ground, and a team of firefighters rush in to put it out.

A bar is burning to the ground and a team of firefighters rush in to put out the fire. When they get inside they see an Irishman passed out from smoke inhalation. They drag him out of the bar and eventually the Irishman comes to. The firefighter says "you were there, how did this whole thing get started?!" The Irishman responds "I don't know it was burning when I walked in"

What kind of girls date firefighters?

Hose.

Firefighters joke, What kind of girls date firefighters?

Some people say the firefighters deserve more money.

But apparently they took a poll and the all fell through a hole in the floor.

Some people say that firefighters need more money,

So a poll was taken, and they all fell through the floor.

Some say firefighters aren't paid enough.

But recently a poll was taken... And they all fell through the floor.


What makes firefighters such great pimps?

They have a handle on their hose.

Did you hear about the fire at the hemp factory?

It was high priority for the firefighters to get there.

Who stands outside samsung stores?

Firefighters.

Firefighters recovered just the bottom of one shoe after the shoe factory burned down

It was the sole survivor.

A place got lit on fire

But the firefighters were too late to reach and put it out. Media arrived as well to which one of the firefighter giving report said, "I've got a good news and a bad news, the bad news is, 41 children died in that fire. But the good news is it was an orphanage, so I have no parents to notify"

What do you call women firefighters?

Firehoes

How many firefighters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just one, but it took three to get it back out

What kind of women are attracted to firefighters?

Hose!

What makes firefighters so sexy?

They always put out

Message from Europe

European: If your house is burning, should firefighters help you?
American: Yes of course. That is logical. And im willing to pay tax for it.
European: If you get robbed, should the police help you?
American: Yes of course. That is logical. And im willing to pay tax for it.
European: If you get hurt, should doctors help you?
American: Absolutely not! We dont want socialist propaganda.

A lot of people think that firefighters are overpaid, but recently a pole was taken...

...and they all fell through a hole in the floor.

-Milton Jones

Firefighters

How do firefighters describe their job as?

LIT AF

What holiday do firefighters refuse to celebrate?

May Day.

No one understands how important milliseconds are, better than volunteer firefighters

It's the amount of time they have from meeting you, to telling you they are a volunteer firefighter.

On the 4th of july firefighters fight fire with fire

Because fireworks

They say firefighters deserve higher wages

but apparently a poll was taken and they all fell through a hole in the floor.

The firefighters in Greece are making the fire worse.

You aren't supposed to use water on Greece fires.

What do you call women with a fetish for firefighters?

Fire Hoes.

The best literary scholars on the planet...

...were the 9/11 firefighters.

Those guys went through hundreds of stories in *seconds!*

When Canadian firefighters screw up

do Canadians say, "Nice job, hosers!"

I hate those people who come and knock on my door, telling me how I have to be "saved" or else I'll "burn"

Stupid firefighters.

Once, me and my family wanted to bake some marshmallows in the campfire.

We had the poles with marshmallows sticked to them prepared when we heard sirens. We all ran out to see what happened. The neighbours' house was on fire and I saw a lot of firefighters trying to get the fire under control. The neighbours looked at us with pure disgust. That was the moment I realized we were still holding the sticks with marshmallows.

Saw some videos about the fires burning near Athens.

Apparently nobody told the firefighters that you can't use water to put out a Greece fire.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the firefighters milliseconds jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working firefighters firefighter cop piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes