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Fire Department Jokes

55 fire department jokes and hilarious fire department puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about fire department that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Fire Department Short Jokes

Short fire department jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The fire department humour may include short fire fighters jokes also.

  1. So i got fired from my job at the library, today Apparently the books about womens rights, do not belong at the fantasy department..
  2. Why was Alan Turing fired from the department store? He was unable to compute whether or not any given top was a halter top.
  3. a blonde calls 911 and says "help, help, my house is on fire" ...operater says "stay calm ma'am, we'll send the fire department. how do we get to your house?" Blonde: "duh...big red truck"
  4. A blonde calls the fire department "My house is on fire, my house is on fire!!"
    Fire Chef: " Well how do we get there?"
    Blonde: " Duh... big red truck..."
  5. on fire The chief of the fire department walks into the room where the other firemen wait and says: "Take it easy boys, the Tax Office is on fire."
  6. Did you hear about the history professor who got fired just for passing out in a chair? If it had been the chair of any other department he'd probably still have a job
  7. My grandfather has Alzheimer's so bad that everytime he farts, he calls the fire department.
  8. My friend was fired from his job at the road department for stealing. I have to say I saw it coming. The last time I was at his house all the signs were there.
  9. I almost got fired last month because the word got out that I was intolerant... I had to explain all about lactose to the Human Resource department.
  10. My buddy got fired from the road department He was accused of stealing traffic signals.
    When the cops went to his house, all the signs were there.

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Fire Department One Liners

Which fire department one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with fire department? I can suggest the ones about fire brigade and firefighter.

  1. I got fired from the unemployment department. They're still paying me though.
  2. Why do fire departments have dalmatians? To help the firemen find the hydrants
  3. What did the Mexican fire department name their hose? Hose A and Hose B.
  4. Before you fight fire with fire, remember that the fire department generally uses water.
  5. I once crashed my car into a fire department... The response was incredible
  6. When the fire department catches fire, they call Chuck Norris.
  7. Yo momma's so old, the fire department is on standby when you light her birthday cake.
  8. What's the NYC fire department's all-time favourite song? It's raining men
  9. Fighting fire with fire? The fire department generally uses water, but ok.
  10. Why did the mexican fire department fail? They didnt have any Jose to spray the water.
  11. My family forgot to tell me happy birthday I forgot to call the fire department.
  12. I ran into your mother today... Took the fire department nearly an hour to pull me out.

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about fire department can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of fire department puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Playful Fire Department Jokes to Add Joy and Laughter to Your Group

What funny jokes about fire department you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean fireman jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make fire department prank.

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.

A blonde comes home from a day of shopping and discovers that her house is on fire, so she calls the fire department on her cell phone.
"Please state the nature of your emergency," says the operator.
"Help! My house is on fire!" the blonde replies.
"Okay, where do you live?"
"In a house you silly billy!" the blonde replies.
"No,no! How do we get there?" the operator asks frustratedly.
"Duh! Big Red Truck!!"

A man works in the operations department of a large bank.


Employees call him from the field when they have problems with their computers.
One night a blonde woman from a branch bank called him and said, "I've got smoke coming from the back of my computer terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?"

Mother: "Why was the phone busy all night?"
Babysitter: "The fire department put me on hold."

The worst part about working for the department of unemployment is when you get fired you still have to show up the next day.

Two brothers lived together

with their grandmother and her cat. The first brother went on a business trip, and when he arrived at his destination, he checked into his hotel, and called his brother at home. "I made it safe and sound" he said. "How is everything?"
"Bad" said the second brother. "The cat is dead."
"WHAT?!? How could you be so insensitive to tell me like that?" The first brother exclaimed. "You could have broken it to me slowly by saying the cat is on the roof, but you've called the fire department and they were trying to get her down. Later you could have called me and told me that the fire department got the cat down but she has a broken leg, so you are taking her to the veterinarian. Tomorrow you could have called me and told me despite the veterinarian's best efforts, the cat died."
"Sorry", said the second brother. "I'll remember that next time."
"Good", said the first brother. "By the way, how is Grandma?"
The second brother replied, "Oh, Grandma is on the roof."

The oil fire.

Several decades ago, there was an oil tycoon. He discovered one morning, that one of his largest oil wells had burst and caught fire costing him large amounts of money by the minute. He quickly called all the large fire departments for miles around, offering thirty thousand dollars to the department that could extinguish the blaze. Many departments and trucks from miles around tried but failed, all stopping 200 yards away from the inferno. A small, four man department from a not very well known town went blazing past all the stopped trucks and drove right up to the blown well. Only having two buckets of water and three buckets of sand they quickly dumped all the had and the fire went out. They owner of the well ran up and was over joyed. He asked to chief what they would buy first with the large amount of money. The chief calmly said, "well the first thing im doin is replacing the brakes on this here truck".

Volunteer fire department

So a farmer purchased a huge plot of land for his farm. Within less then a week an enormous fire breaks out and rages through the field. The fire department arrives almost immedeately and tries everything but the fire is too hot and too strong, keeping them from getting near the largest parts of the fire.
As backup, they call in the volunteer fire department and within a few minutes they arrive on their rickety, rusted fire truck that looks decades old. To the fire department's surprise, the volunteer fire department drives straight through the perimeter of the fire and directly INTO the blazing center. Immediately they jump out of the truck and begin spraying water in all directions which separates the large fire into to smaller ones, which are easily put out.
The farmer is overjoyed at having his land and crops saved, and writes the volunteer fire department a check for 10 thousand dollars for their bravery. When he hands them the check and commends their heroism, they reply "Great, This should be more than enough to fix the breaks on our truck!"

A burglar

Some young man is trying to get into my room through the window, screamed old Mrs. Kleinman into the telephone.
Sorry, lady, came back the answer, you've got the fire department. What you want is the police department.
No, no, she pleaded, I want the fire department. What he needs is a longer ladder!

The burning sofa joke

(Someone told me this a long time ago and I thought it was sort of really clever, but hard to get. Been telling it since. Few people seem to like it. Here goes...)
The fire department is called to a social club. They walk in with their equipment and find a man lying down on a sofa, and the sofa on fire. They pull the man up, put out his burning clothes, and hose down the sofa. Crisis averted.
Afterward, one of the fireman asks him, "Sir, did you see how the fire got started?"
"No, I'm sorry," he replies. "It was like that when I lay down."

A Frenchman calls the fire department...

He wakes up and his kitchen is ablaze. He calls the local fire department and says " Sacre Bleu! You must 'elp me! There eez a fire please come and put eet out ! "
The fireman on the phone responds " Calm down, we'll be right there, just tell us how to get there"
The Frenchman , confused , asks the fireman , " 'ow do you get 'ere? What 'appened to your big red trucks?!"

So this guy working in a construction supplies department gets fired...

And the boss needs to hire someone else. So he posts an add online, and there is this Chinese dude that applies, and no one else..
So the foreman hires the guy...
Foreman: "Sir, are you good with a supplies store?"
Worker: "Yes, vellly good with supplies, velly good" (with his pronounced accent)
Foreman:"Ok, good, you hired, thank you"
So the days goes by, and the supplies store is locked all day, the next day too. and the rest of the week goes all the same, with no Chinese man in sight.
So the next monday, the foreman goes to the supplies store in mid-day, and see its still locked.. He uses his master key and opens the door.. There is a bunch of baloons and decorations, but no Chinese worker around...
Then the foreman turns around. and sees the Chinese man with a crew of 20 of them popping out of the closet screaming...
SUPRISE!!!!!!
xD

When I grow up!

One day a child and his mother were walking down the sidewalk when they came upon a burning building. The fire department had just showed up and all the people inside were saved by the strong firemen. The little kid looks to his mother and says "mom, when I grow up I'm gonna be a fireman!". The mother replies "you're not going to grow up!, you've got luekimia!"

Three boys are in the schoolyard bragging of how great their fathers are.

The first one says, "Well, my father runs the fastest. He can fire an arrow, and start to run, I tell you, he gets there before the arrow."
The second boy says, "Ha! You think that's fast! My father is a hunter. He can shoot his gun and be there before the bullet!"
The third one listens to the other two and shakes his head. He then says, "You two know nothing about speed. My father works in the Govt department. He stops working at 5:00 and he is home by 3:45!!"

Man got stuck in a tree..

His cat called the fire department and ended up getting a reward (treat)

A r**... Came Home and Found His House on Fire

A r**... came home and found his house on fire, rushed next door, telephoned the fire department and shouted, "Hurry over here. My house is on fire!"
"OK," replied the fireman, "how do we get there?"
"Say, don't you still have those big red trucks?"

Cat Joke

A man goes on a business trip and has his best friend watch his cat. In the middle of his trip, he calls to check on things, but his friend says, "Yeah, your cat died."
So the man gets upset. "You can't just say that! You should have broke it to me slowly. Like, this time, you could have said, 'she's on the roof, but the fire department is getting her down'. Next time I called, you could say 'the fireman dropped her and they took her to the vet'. Third time, 'sorry man, they did all they could, but Fluffy passed away'."
His friend says. "Alright, I'll remember that."
The man sighs. "So how's my mother doing?"
"Oh, she's on the roof, but the fire department is getting her down."

Dumb blonde

A dumb blonde calls the fire department because her home is on fire.
"Help me, help me! My house is on fire!" she says.
"Ok, how do we get to your home". replies the dispatcher.
"DUH! Big red truck!"

A man is going out of town on a buisness trip

So he asks his brother to watch his cat. Two weeks into the trip he calls his brother.
Man: "So, how is my cat?"
Brother""Well listen the cat died"
Man: "That's not how you break something like that to someone. That cat really meant a lot to me. You should have said something like 'the cat got out on the roof and it got scared so it latched on. By the time the fire department came it had died of exposure.'"
Brother: "Oh, I'm sorry. Next time something like that comes up I will let you know"
Man: "Anyway, thats not what matters. What matters is family how's mom?"
Brother: "Well mom got out on the roof....."

Little old lady calls the fire department

A little old lady calls the fire department and says, help, come right away, my house is on fire.
The dispatcher says okay ma'am, how do we get there?
The little old lady replies, don't ya'll still have that red truck?

A man walks into a rough pub near Glasgow docks...

..."here, lads, there's been a big department store fire in town, loads of stock's been written off, I can sort you out with a few things, if you'd like, what're you after?"
After doing the rounds and taking orders for various items of clothing, and even a few bigger items, someone up the back of the pub pipes up, "here, I didn't see anything about a big fire on the news, when was it?"
"Tomorrow".

A Blonde woman moves into a brand new neighbourhood,

The following evening her house catches fire and starts burning quickly, she quickly calls emergency services and gets put through to the fire department,
Blonde: Hello my house is burning down, you must come quickly.
Fire Chief: Ok no problem tell us where you live.
Blonde: It's a new house outside of town, on a new development.
Fire Chief: we don't seem to have your address on our systems, tell us how to get there.
Blonde: Hellllloooooooooo in your fkn red truck !

I drove past the fire department the other day.

They had a big public awareness sign that read:
"Are your house numbers visible?"
I thought:
"Who cares? How about you just stop at the house that's on fire?"

jokes about fire department

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these fire department jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.