Fire And Rescue Jokes
6 fire and rescue jokes and hilarious fire and rescue puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about fire and rescue that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Fire And Rescue Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good fire and rescue joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
I went deer hunting with my older brothers when I was a youngster
It was in a mountainous area and I got separated from the group. Hopeless and lost I remember them telling me what to do: fire 3 shots in the air and they would come rescue me. Every 20 minutes I did that until I was accidentally found by a group of hunters that just happened to be passing by. I told them I sure was glad to see them! I was down to my last 3 arrows!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man is walking down the street an sees that his favorite brothel is on fire
He selflessly runs into the flames and comes back out with a dwarf s**... worker. When asked why he rescued her, he says "I always save a little fellator"
I was out hunting and got lost with my dad...
We were wandering around the woods for hours with no sight of the road. The sun was starting to set so I say to my dad,
I hear when you get lost, you are supposed to fire three shots in the air, and someone will come rescue you.
He said that sounded like a great idea! So he set off three shots into the air and we start to wait.
About 45 minutes pass and no one comes for us. I tell my dad to fire three more shots into the air. He does and This time we wait about an hour and a half. Still no one comes.
I tell my dad to try one last time but he says to me,
I'm sorry son, I'm all out of arrows.
Southern Baptist will get this.
A guy is stranded on a deserted island and has a big SOS made of rocks and a fire burning down on the beach. hoping for rescue.
Finally, after about a year a ship sees his fire and sends a rescue boat to the island. The rescuer gets out of the boat and sees the guy standing on the beach in front of 3 huts.
The rescuer asks "why do you have 3 huts here?"
the guy says, "well, the one on the left is my home and the one in the middle is where I go to church."
Rescuer asks "so, what's the one on the right for?"
"Oh, that's where I USED to go to church."
A guy is walking along and sees a farmer out in the field with a pig.
The pig has an artificial leg.
The guy walks up to the farmer and says "Wow, I've never seen a pig with an artificial leg before."
The farmer points to a house across the road and says "See that house? That's my house. We had a fire about a month ago. That pig came in and rescued me, went back in and rescued my wife, and then went back in and rescued my two daughters."
The guy says, "Wow, that's amazing. So he burned his leg and had to get a fake one?"
The farmer said, "No. But you don't eat a pig like that all at one time."
Pig With a Wooden Leg
A journalist on vacation in Texas is driving on his way to do some sightseeing. Soon, he gets stuck in traffic. After slowly inching his way forward, he decides to take a back road. After getting hopelessly lost, he stops at the nearest ranch to ask for directions. Walking up to the ranch, he is met by a farmer, who is followed by a pig with a wooden leg. At first, the journalist is extremely confused, but then realizes that this could be an interesting new story, and asks the farmer about the pig.
"Oh, him? This here is Orville; he's one helluva pig. See those derricks yonder?" he asks as he points to the horizon, where indeed there are several derricks.
"One day, I was walking, and Orvill starts digging and a digging like crazy. Right after, he done struck oil, made me rich!"
The journalist, writing furiously, stops, with a stunned look.
"WOW! That's amazing! But...why does he have a wooden leg?"
The farmer replies, "Well, after we were rich, I built me a mansion. We lived really happily, until one day, a fire started! My wife and I got out, but the baby was still inside. Sho' nuff, Orville runs inside and rescues Junior!"
The journalist, amazed, continues scribbling furiously. "That's amazing, what a pig! But...why does he have a wooden leg?"
The farmer looks at him and says,
"Pig like that, ya can't eat in one piece, now, can ya?"
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