Finland Jokes
83 finland jokes and hilarious finland puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about finland that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Finland Short Jokes
Short finland jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The finland humour may include short border jokes also.
- Why are priests from Finland so good at Mortal Kombat? They're especially well-versed in Finnish hymns.
- Why do Norway, Sweden, and Finland put QR codes on their military vessels? So they can Scandinavian as they return.
- A Russian man drives up to the border with Finland The Finnish border guard takes his passport and asks the man - "Occupation?"
"No. Only a holiday." - What is a marathon runner doing when he starts a marathon in Russia that ends in Finland? Russian to Finnish.
- I once attended a sermon at a church in Finland. The congregation must have been huge Mortal Kombat fans because they were singing a Finnish hymn.
- Why will you never win a race against a runner from Finland? Before you even start, they are already Finnish.
- The safety distance of 2 meters has been hard for the people in Finland. Luckily, when it's over, we can return to the usual 10 meter distancing.
- I haven't seen my friend since he started working for Finland's national airline He disappeared into Finnair.
- Why does Shang Tsung always enjoy a religious song from Finland? Because it's a Finnish hymn.
- Olympic Sailing results are in! denmark have taken gold
Finland have taken silver
Somalia have taken a middle aged couple who were on a worldwide cruise
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Finland One Liners
Which finland one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with finland? I can suggest the ones about invade and motherland.
- What do you call a dead man from Finland? Finnished
- What is the sign for a U-turn in Finland? "You are approaching the Russian border."
- Finland has just joined NATO. It's good to know their application is Finnish.
- Where do sharks go on vacation? Finland
- What kind of church music do they sing in Finland? FINNISH HYMN!
- What do you call Finland's border? The Finnish line
- Why do people cheer when they reach the Finland border? It's the Finnish line.
- Why are the men in Finland so bad in bed? Because they're always finnish first
- What line goes through Finland? The Finnish line.
- Being in Finland in these times makes me feel so good. Lots of indoor finns.
- I don't like Finland.... But their flag is a plus.
- Many people say that Finland started wars. I thought they Finnish them.
- Why does Finland have the best runner's in the world? Because they Finnish first
- Why is it a bad idea to invade Finland? Because you'll be Finnished.
- What happened when Finland closed their borders? Nobody could pass telhe Finnish line!
Uproarious Finland Jokes to Share with Friends
What funny jokes about finland you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean station jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make finland pranks.
Why Are Firetrucks Red?
Firetrucks have 4 wheels and carry 8 men.
4 + 8 = 12
There are 12 inches in a ruler.
Queen Elizabeth was a ruler.
There was once a ship named Elizabeth that sailed the seas.
Fish live in the seas.
Fish have fins.
People from Finland are called Fins.
Finland and Russia had a war a long time ago.
Russia has red on its flag.
And that's why they're red.
Cause they're always *russian* around.
Russian referendum.
Russia initiates a referendum in Crimea about returning Crimea back to Russia. Ukraine initiates a referendum about returning Kaliningrad to Germany, Sakhalin and the Kuril Islands to Japan, Kazan - to Tatar, Karelia - to Finland, Siberia to Yakuts, and everything situated east from Ural mountains - to ingenious people.
What do you call a guy who refuses to serve people from Finland at his bar?
A man with unfinnished buisness.
Vacations
Russian military tank crosses the border into Finland and a Russian soldier steps out.
"Good morning," says the Border police, "Name?"
"Ivan Ivanovich."
"Occupation?"
"No, just a vacation."
I am liking the people from Finland
They always finish
TIL that for release in Finland, the original Mortal Kombat had to be censored in an unusual way. Censors were fine with the gore, but insisted the music be replaced with traditional Christian songs.
FINNISH HYMN!!!
How many Estonians you need to build a house in Finland ?
Who knows, there is no tax record of it.
Which Nordic country should you never be a part of?
Finland.
Once you're a citizen, that's it!
You're Finnish! It's over.
I'm going to run a 5K to Finland.
When you enter the country it will be the Finnish line.
What did the woman from Finland say after seeing an old man fall in the water, knowing he couldn't swim?
"Oh no, Helsinki! He Finnish!"
What happens when a guy from Finland dies?
He is finnished.
Ha ha ha. God I am so depressed. :(
Putin lands at Helsinki airport...
...and the immigration officer says "Name?". "Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin". "Address?" "Kremlin, Moscow, Russia". "Occupation?" "No, this time just visiting".
Credit goes to a dude in the Finland thread. Made me laugh.
Why should you never race with a guy from Finland?
Because they're already Finnish before the race even began
What did the man in Finland say after his meal?
I'm Finnish.
comrade, what is difference between constitution of Russian motherland and the Finland?
Both constitutions guarantee freedom of speech, but only in finland do you get freedom after speech.
After the World War 2
Finnish general Adolf Ehrnrooth was visiting England. British general asked him how many Russian troops were stationed in Finland. "A few hundred thousand" answered Ehrnrooth. "Where in Finland are they stationed?" The British general asked. Ehrnrooth answered: "Two meters underground around the border."
I applied to a citizen of Finland
In the online application there was an odd question. "Are you a nice guy", it said, I thought it was an odd question but I clicked yes. Immediately I was directed to a page saying I was directed to the back of the queue for citizenship, I was confused but I read later in the application and it said. "Nice guys, Finnish last".
How can Finland be one of the happiest countries in the world with such a high s**... rate?
All the miserable people kill themselves
Why are all immigrants to Finland winners?
Because they all crossed the Finnish line.
What Olympic country is projected to win the most medals?
Finland. They always Finnish.
I just found out that no lines of latitude pass through Finland!
As they cross the border, that's the Finish line.
Why is Finland the most competitive country in the world?
You can't find a road, store, or park without a Finnish line.
Soviet diplomats
It would be great if in 1941 Italy, Romania, Finland and Spain, having shown solidarity with Germany, limited themselves to the expulsion of several Soviet diplomats.
My girlfriend has a lot in common with Finland.
Neither of them exist.
What do they call summer in Finland?
The best day of the year.
I filled out an application to become a citizen of Finland and I must've been accepted almost instantly
The last button I had to click said Finish
Russia really want to invade Finland so they can rest
As they would cross the Finnish line.
What happens when a guy from Finland beats you up?
You get Finnished
COVID-19 news: Finland forced to close their borders again
No one will be crossing the finish line.
It is claimed that Trump thought Finland was controlled by Russia
Finnish officials shrugged and said they thought the same was true of Trump
Do you know what country is first place?
Finland. They are already at the Finnish line
A man goes to apply for Finnish citizenship.
A man goes to apply for Finnish citizenship. He says to the employee, I want to be a citizen of Finland. The employee responds in broken English.
Employee: You nice?
Man: Um... I suppose so.
Back of line.
What's the problem?
Nice guys Finnish last.
Do you know why firetrucks are red?
Firetrucks have 4 wheels and carry 8 people.
4+8=12
There are 12 inches in a ruler
Queen Elizabeth is a ruler
There was a ship named Queen Elizabeth
Ships sail on seas
Seas have fish
Fish have fins
People from Finland are Finns
Finland and Russia border each other
Russians are red
Firetrucks are always Russian around
Although relations between the two countries have improved over the years, there's still a lot of bad blood between Finland and Norway.
It's called Sweden.
Why is it impossible to hold a race in Finland?
Because in Finland, every line is a Finnish line. . .
Popeye is seen as iconic in America, but how is he viewed in Finland?
Oh, he's strong to the Finnish...
I just found out my favorite arcade game used Christian music from the 1800s Finland in the background.
Yeah. Mortal Kombat used Finnish Hymns
As of today it is legal for fruit to get married in Finland
Sadly the new law restricts one type of fruit to large elaborate wedding ceremonies............
Cantaloupe
A Finnish joke from the Cold War
During the Cold War, a foreign journalist asked a Finnish general what Finland would do if the USSR and NATO would fight a war in Finland.
He replied first we would beat out NATO, and then the Soviets .
The journalist was surprised about the order and asked why.
We are civilized people. Work comes before pleasure , the general replied.
Old Finnish ww2 joke
Finnish general Adolf Ehrnrooth was visiting in England after the World War II.
British general asked him how many Russian troops were stationed in Finland.
"A few hundred thousand" answered Ehrnrooth.
"Where in Finland are they stationed?" The British general asked.
Ehrnrooth answered: "Two meters underground around the border."
There has never been a ghost sighting in Finland
All the ghosts who died there went on to the afterlife due to them having no un-Finnish-ed business.
My wife and I are taking an around-the-world trip. We are going to stop in Finland last.
Because that is where you find the Finnish
What country has the highest population of fish?
Finland
A Trans-Nordic race was planned to pass through Norway, Sweden, and Finland, ending at the Russian border.
But everyone stopped at the Finnish line instead.
I was chatting with my Finnish friend the other day...
I asked him where his favorite part of Finland was.
He said "Hyvä kysymys! I really like Rovaniemi for the Santa Claus Village!"
I asked him "Hyvä kysymys? What's that?"
All he said was "Good question!"
It's been a week and he still hasn't told me what it means.
(I'm learning Finnish, this joke has likely been done before with a different language, haven't seen it here yet)
edit: fingers added a letter, got it fixed
