Finding Money Jokes
91 finding money jokes and hilarious finding money puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about finding money that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Finding Money Short Jokes
Short finding money jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The finding money humour may include short counting money jokes also.
- Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.
- I took my metal detector to the beach today expecting to find antiques of great value. Beach better have my money
- Jim finds a genie in a lamp The genie says "you have three wishes to make"
Jim instantly says "I wish I were rich!"
The genie responds, "and for your second wish?"
Rich says "I want lots of money" - What I need is to find a woman who loves me for my money ... but doesn't understand maths.
- Mike Birbiglia
- So, I have had a pretty weird morning... First I find a hat filled with money, and then out of nowhere I get randomly chased by an angry man with a guitar!
- My sister's onlyfans makes a lot of money I'm going to have to tell her when she finds the hidden cameras
- Lazy thieves They were two thieves so lazy that they robbed a bank and in order not to count the money, they waited for the evening news to find out how much they had stolen.
- How are welders like prostitutes? You usually find them in awkward positions screaming for more rod and more money.
- People call me ugly... Until they find how much money I have.
Then they call me ugly and broke - I drove home drunk last night.. ..to find my girlfriend waiting at the door.
She yelled Why are you driving half drunk?
I said, I'm sorry, I ran out of money
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Finding Money One Liners
Which finding money one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with finding money? I can suggest the ones about making money and saving money.
- A Robber entered my home in hopes of finding money..... I joined the search with him.
- I came into some money yesterday. I couldn't find the tissues.
- After Finding Nemo, how did Dory make money? She started an OnlyFins.
- Where can you always find money in the forest? The river bank
- What is the worst way to find out you just came into money? via sticky notes
- Finding money while doing laundry feels just like a sore peter... ...you can't beat it!
- Behind every successful man, you'll find a woman who has nothing to wear.
- I don't find it hard to meet expenses. They're everywhere.
- How much money would it cost to find and capture the Loch Ness Monster? About tree fiddy
- That priceless moment when you find money in you pocket
Finding Money Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about finding money you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean spending money jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make finding money pranks.
A man being mugged by two thugs put up a tremendous fight!
Finally, the thugs subdued him and took his wallet.
Upon finding only two dollars in the wallet, the surprised t**... said "Why did you put up such a fight?"
To which the man promptly replied "I was afraid that you would find the $200 hidden in my shoe!"
I'm so broke, I don't even get excited when I find money because I'm sure I owe it to someone.
A gay American was caught by his Filipino gay husband cheating.
The American husband asked, "how did you find out?"
The Filipino husband replied, "through my Western Union Receipts."
Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
Peeing in the Flowers...
A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her. One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 fell out onto the sidewalk.
Noticing this, a policeman stopped her and said, "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag."
"Oh, really? Darn it!" said the little old lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me officer."
"Well, now, not so fast," said the cop. Where did you get all that money? You didn't steal it, did you?"
"Oh, no, no", said the old lady. "You see, my back yard is right next to a golf course. A lot of Golfers come and pee through a knot hole in my fence, right into my flower garden. It used to really tick me off. Kills the flowers, you know. Then I thought, 'Why not make the best of it?'"
So, now, I stand behind the fence by the knot hole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers. Every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I surprise him, grab hold of it and say, 'O.K., buddy! Give me $20, or off it comes!'"
"Well, that seems only fair," said the cop, laughing. "OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"
"Not everybody pays."
A guy escape from prision
A man escapes from prison, where he sat for the last 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns.
However, the only thing he finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair. Then he ties the young woman on the bed, comes on top of her and kisses her on her neck. Then he gets up and goes to the bathroom.
While he is there, the husband whispers to his wife: "Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes. He probably long in jail and all those years not seen a woman. I saw how he kissed you on your neck. If he wants s**..., do not go against him, do not complain and make him happy. He is dangerous and if he gets angry, he'll kill us both! Be strong honey, I love you!
"The young woman replied:" He kissed me on my neck. He whispered in my ear. He told me he was gay, that he really liked you and asked if there was some Vaseline in the bathroom. Be strong honey, I love you ... "
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller.
He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack.
"Miss Whack", he says, "I'd like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday".
Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says that his name is Kermit Jagger. He says that his dad is m**... Jagger, and it's okay for him to take out all of the money because he is friends with the bank manager. Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.
The frog says "Sure, have this", and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink, and perfectly formed. Very confused, Patty tells him that she'll have to consult with the bank manager. She then disappears into the back office.
She finds the manager and says "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral". She holds up the tiny elephant pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?"
The bank manager looks back at her and says "It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan, his old man's a Rolling Stone".
Women call me ugly,
Women call me ugly,
But wait till they find out how much money I have now.
Then they will call me ugly and poor.
A North Irish girl lives with her grandmother...
and they find that they are running very low on money. The girl tells her grandma,
"I'm going to head off south to find work, I'll come back with money. I promise."
The girl is gone for many months, and when she returns home she has tons of money! The grandmother is overjoyed and says,
"How did you make all this money, child?"
The girl says in a hushed voice, "Well, I was a p**... grandma."
The grandmother looked enraged, "What did you say?!"
"I was a p**..., grandma! I'm sorry."
The grandmother calms down, "Oh thank God! I thought you said you were a protestant!"
That's some solid advice!
A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.
He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair. While tying the girl to the bed, he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom.
While he's in there, the husband tells his wife, "Listen this guy's an escaped convict - look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jailand hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants s**..., don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."
To which the wife responds, "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked if we had any Vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong, honey. I love you too.
B'dum tsss
A collection of jokes I have found over the years about drummers.
**NOTE:** Before you get offended, I AM A DRUMMER. I FIND THESE FUNNY TOO.
1. What do you call a drummer in a suit? The defendant
2. How can you tell a drummer's at the door? The knocking speeds up
3. What do you call a drummer with half a brain? Gifted
4. What does a drummer use for contraception? His personality
5. Did you hear about the drummer who finished high school? Me neither
6. What did the drummer say to the band leader? "Do you want me to play too fast or too slow?"
7. How many drummers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Five: One to screw it in, four to say that Neil Peart could've done it better
8. Why do guitarists put drumsticks on the dash of their car? So that they can use the handicapped parking space
9. How do you get a drummer off your porch? Give him the money for the pizza
10. What do you call a guy who hangs out with musicians? A drummer
Anyone got any more?
An old sailor decides to get in uniform and hit the "red light" district, for one last good time...
He finds himself a willing "date", and after a bit of haggling, the price is settled on, and the transaction is made. After about 10 minutes, he asks the lady, "How am I doin', honey?" The p**... replies, "About 3 knots, sailor... you're not hard, you're not in, and you're not gettin' your money back."
Little Johnny is at Toys R Us...
Little Johnny is at Toys R Us looking for a new toy to buy. He finally finds a toy car he really likes and decides to buy it. He goes up to the cashier to pay for the toy car and offers fake Monopoly money. The cashier says to Little Johnny, "are you dumb? this is not real money." Little Johnny responds, "You're s**..., neither is the car..."
Secrets to a happy marriage
1. It is important to find a woman that cooks and cleans.
2. It is important to find a woman that makes good money.
3. It is important to find a woman that likes to have s**....
and MOST important...
4. It is important that these three women never meet.
A blonde finds herself in serious money trouble...
Lost her job and she's in dire financial straits.
She's desperate so she decides to ask God for help. She begins to pray... "God, please help me. I've lost my job and if I don't get some money, I'm going to lose my house as well. Please let me win the lottery."
Lottery night comes, and somebody else wins.
She again prays... "God, please let me win the lottery! I've lost my job, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well."
Lottery night comes and she still has no luck.
Once again, she prays... "My God, why have you forsaken me? I've lost my job, my house, and my car. My children are starving. I don't often ask You for help, and I've always been a good servant to You. PLEASE let me win the lottery just this one time so I can get my life back in order."
Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light as the heavens open.
The blonde is overwhelmed by the Voice of God, Himself...."Sweetheart, work with Me on this.... Buy a ticket."
A Husband Told His Wife...
"I'm putting this briefcase full of money in the attic. When I die and go to Heaven, I'll take it up there with me."
Well the day comes when he dies and a few months later the wife goes to the attic and finds the briefcase still where he left it before he died.
"I knew I should have put it in the basement..."
An old man found a box in his attic.
Inside were two knit bonnets and $250,000. He went to his wife and asked if she knew anything about it. She explained, "Every time I was mad at you, I'd knit a bonnet." The man was happy to find that, in 40 years of marriage, he'd only angered his wife twice. "OK, that explains the bonnets, but what about the money?" the old man asked. His wife smiled and said,"That's from selling all the bonnets I've made over the years."
4 rules for a happy marriage
1. It is important to find a woman who cooks and cleans.
2. It is important to find a woman who makes good money.
3. It is important to find a woman who loves to have s**....
4. It is very important that these three women never meet!!
Women = Problems
To find a woman you need **time** and **money**
Woman = Time x Money
**"Time is Money"**
Time = Money
Therefore:
Woman = Money x Money
Woman = (Money)^2
**"Money is the root of all problems"**
Money = √Problems
Therefore Woman = (√Problems)^2
**Woman = Problems**
I agree even in marriage, s**... without wife's consent is r**..., But by same logic isn't spending husband's money by the wife without his consent...Robbery? Why do our films find it funny? How can people joke about it?
An escaped prisoner enters a house...
A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife: "Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants s**..., don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you." To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!"
Why couldn't the FBI find Sepp Blatter's bribe money?
He used it all to bribe Canada to host the Women's World Cup.
Many times when I am troubled or confused...
Many times when I am troubled or confused, I find comfort in sitting in my back yard and having a v**... Martini along with a quiet conversation with Jesus.
This happened to me again after a particularly difficult day. I said "Jesus, why do I work so hard?"
And I heard the reply: "Men find many ways to demonstrate the love they have for their family. You work hard to have a peaceful, beautiful place for your friends and family to gather."
I said: "I thought that money was the root of all evil."
And the reply was: "No, the LOVE of money is the root of all evil. Money is a tool; it can be used for good or bad".
I was starting to feel better, but I still had that one burning question, so I asked it. "Jesus," I said, "what is the meaning of life? Why am I here?"
He replied: "That is a question many men ask. The answer is in your heart and is different for everyone. I would love to chat with you some more, Señor, but for now, I have to finish your lawn."
Crossing the Border
A young Mexican man decides he wants to see a bit of America. He swims across the Rio Grande and finds a college football game about to start. He doesn't have any money to get in, so he climbs a flag pole to watch the game. Later that night he swims back across the river and tells his family how friendly the Americans all were, as they all turned to him at the start of the game and asked together, "Jose, can you see?"
Finding Money
Reaching into a pair of pants and finding a w**... of money is a great feeling . . . . until the person wearing the pants starts screaming.
A guy rescued a genie.
To return the favor, the genie offered him a wish: he could have unlimited money, or unlimited wisdom. The man chose the latter. A few days passed by, his friend came to visit him, finding him crying very fiercely and screaming the sentence: "I should have chosen the money."
As a paramedic, I've learned that there is something you can never say with a straight face:
I'm having a s**....
Working holiday
A husband comes home to find his wife with her suitcases packed in the living room.
"Where are you going?" he asks.
"I'm going to Las Vegas. I can earn $200 for a b**... there, and I figured that I might as well earn money for what I do for you for free."
The husband thinks for a moment, goes upstairs, and comes back down, with his suitcase packed as well.
"Where are you going?" the wife asks.
"I'm coming with you. I want to see how you can live on $200 a year."
The safest place for my money is with my girlfriend
Every time I come home I can't find it, she must hide it well
What't the difference between a man and a woman ?
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man
To find a women you need time and money
To find a women you need time and money; therefore *Women=Time+Money*
But "Time is Money", therefore: Time=Money and so *Women=Money*Money* or Money^2
But "Money is the root of all Problems", therefore: *Money=√All_Problems*
using those two absolutes we can say that
Women=(√All_Problems)^2
**Women=All_Problems**
What do you call an Alligator that's good with money and even better at finding people?
"Investigator"
What's the difference between a thief and a consultant.
A thief will steal your money and leave. But a consultant will steal your money and try to help you find it.
A man's car breaks down near a monastary.
He goes to the door and knocks. The Friar opens the door. The man asks for a place to sleep. The Fiar replies,"pay us."
The man, low on money asks why.
"It's to provide a sense of pride and accomplishment for people who find a place to sleep."
Lady of my dreams
The wife checked her husband's phone and found these names:
1. The tender one
2. The amazing one
3. Lady of my dreams
She got angry and called the first number to find out that was his mother.
Then she called the second number on which his sister replied .
When she dialed the third number her own phone rang !!!!
She cried until she could cry no more because she had doubted her innocent husband, so she gave him her whole month's paycheck to make up for her doubts and mistrust.
Once his mother came to know of the story, she sold all her jewelery and gave him the money as well.
Husband took the money and bought a gift for his mistress who listed under "Plumber John".
Four robber are robbing a bank
After opening the safe, the only thing they found is a box with about 200 yogurts. Furious because they didn't find the money, they eat all the 200 yogurts, thinking it'd upset the owner. As they were leaving, they ask the security where was all the money, to which the security answered: "What do you mean where's all the money? This is a s**... bank"
A joke from Israel
o**... is driving his car in Tel-Aviv, looking for a parking spot. It's a busy day, and there's absolutely nothing available. So he starts praying to God. "Please, God, I need a parking space. Help me. I promise to go to the temple every Saturday, I promise to fast on Yom-Kippur, I will give money to charity, anything. Please help me find parking!". And indeed, in a few seconds he sees a car pull out, vacating a great spot. So he says "Okay forget it, I'm all set".
A woman arrives home to find that her place has been broken into
Among the items that have been stolen are her jewelry, money, and her collection of expensive lotions. Police come to file a report and ask her if she would possibly know of any suspects. She responds "No officer, I have no idea of who would do this. But whoever it is is one smooth criminal."
He's so lazy, that if he robbed a bank he wouldn't even count the money.
He'd just wait to find out in the news report.
A burglar enters a house
The owner wakes up and asks:
"What are you doing?"
"I'm looking for money"
"Nice, tell me if you find any"
Ole came home from a long business trip to find his son riding a new 21 speed mountain bike.
"Vere did you get da money for da bike? Dat musta cost $500," he asked.
"It was easy, Dad," little Lars replied. "I earned it hiking."
"Come on Lars," Ole said. "Tell me da truth."
"Dat is da truth Dad!" Lars replied.
"Every night you ver gone, Sven, would come over to see Mom. He'd give me a $10 bill and tell me ta take a hike.
A chemist puts his money in a drawer and goes to sleep. The next day, he finds all his money has disappeared. Why?
Because the drawer also had antimony.
A teenager, who just turned 18, desperately wants a car.
His mother tells him to buy one himself. A chemistry student himself, he finds an effective money-making strategy. Every day, he would sell mixtures of Rhenium, Phosphorus, Osmium, and Tennessine, and he was earning a lot from the sales. Curious, his mother asks him about the mixtures.
The teen replied: RePOsTs are the fastest way to car, Ma.
Bob is walking down the street when he suddenly finds himself face-to-face with a genie.
The genie tells him, I am all-knowing and all-seeing. I will answer any three of your questions, but they will cost you $1000 each.
$1000 per question?! Bob exclaims.
Yes, the genie responds.
Isn't that a lot of money for something like this?
Yes, the genie says. Now ask me your third question.
Once there was a mathematician
Once there was a mathematician. She wasn't very good at her job, but she really enjoyed it. She knew she couldn't make enough money to feed her family, so she decided to make money at night as a p**.... She was surprised at how popular she became, quickly finding herself several regular customers. After one particularly good night, the man held her hand and asked, "That was amazing, you are an exquisite woman. I'm sorry for asking only now, but what is your name?"
The woman replied, "It's okay - it's The Thot That Counts."
I accidentally left a dollar in my pants pocket, and it went through the washer and dryer.
I hope the police don't find out about my money laundering scheme...
I make more money than my wife can ever spend!
The advantages of being single... Just need to find a job and life will be good
A thief entered a house one mid-afternoon to find...
a couple in the middle of l**.... He t**... the woman and at gun-point asked the man to handover all their money and jewellery. The man started sobbing and said, "Brother, take anything you want. But please, untie the rope and let her go." The thief replied, "You must really love your wife, having no regard for your own safety." The man said, "No, she's my neighbour's wife. Mine will be back shortly!"
home invader
A home invader breaks into a house and finds a couple in the bedroom and holds them at gunpoint.
The owner points to the woman and says, "You have to let her go right now.
You can have all the money and jewelry in the house, you can have my credit card and car keys.
You can even shoot me but you have to let her go right now." The gunman says,
"You must really love your wife."
"Yes and she will be home in 20 minutes."
There once was a washing machine that loved washing stuff he found...
He would find ANYTHING on the ground, forcefully shove it inside him, clean it, and take it out. One day he found some money on the ground and did his usual routine before being apprehended by the FBI. He was arrested for Money Laundering.
Change for a $15 bill
An incompentent counterfeiter spent all day making his funny money. At the end of the day he realizes he spent all his time making $15 bills.
He figures that the only way he's going to get anything from this batch of money, is to find a place where the people aren't too bright and change his phoney money for real cash.
He travels to a small town and walks into a small Mom and Pop grocery store. He goes to the old man behind the counter and asks him, "Do you have change for a $15 bill?"
The old man replies, "I sure do...How would you like that? An eight and a seven or two sixes and a three?"
A man was moving to another country and needed to find a new home for his 15 pet monkeys.
He saw a man driving down the road with a big van and so he shouted after him,
"I'll give you €50 to bring these monkeys to the zoo for me"
The man with the van agreed and left with the monkeys in his van.
A couple of hours go by and while he is on his way to the airport, he sees the man with the van again coming up the road with all 15 monkeys still in the back.
"I thought I gave you money to bring those monkeys to the zoo?"
"I did, we had some change from the €50 so I'm bringing them to the cinema now"
You can't take it with you
A wealthy man is on his deathbed. He tells his wife he thinks he has found a way to take his money with him when he dies. He asks her to put some money in a large suitcase and place it in the attic. When his soul leaves his body he'll grab the suitcase on his way to heaven. The wife obliges and does as asked and soon after the man dies.
A few months later the wife is cleaning out the attic and finds the suitcase. "s**... idiot" she says "I knew I should have put it in the basement."
Two Irish friends leave the pub
One says to other, I can't be bothered to walk all the way home.
I know, me too, but we've no money for a cab and we've missed the last bus home.
We could steal a bus from the depot, replies his mate.
They arrive at the bus depot and one goes in to get a bus while the other keeps a look-out. After shuffling around for ages, the lookout shouts, What are you doing? Have you not found one yet?
I can't find a No. 91.
Oh for goodness sake, ye thick sod, take the No. 14 and we'll walk from the roundabout!
Two Irish friends leave the pub.
Two Irish friends leave the pub.
One says to other, 'I can't be bothered to walk all the way home'. 'I know, me too but we've no money for a cab and we've missed the last bus home.
We could steal a bus from the depot' replies his mate.
They arrive at the bus depot and one goes in to get a bus while the other keeps a look-out.
After shuffling around for ages, the lookout shouts, 'What are you doing? Have you not found one yet?'
'I can't find a No. 91' 'Oh for goodness sake, ye thick sod, take the No. 14 and we'll walk from the roundabout.
Rich man arrested for m**...
A rich man is arrested for m**... finds an Attorney that says
" Rich people don't to jail, You have too much money to go to jail, I'll represent you"
It was long drawn out trial, and when his client was convicted, the lawyer made sure he didn't have any money left.
Johann Sebastian Bach finds a time machine...
Johann Sebastian Bach finds a finds machine and comes to present time. He walks into a bar and finds a beautiful woman and introduces himself. He asks to buy her a drink, and she says okay, sure. When he gets to the bar he tells the bartender that he actually doesn't have any American money. The woman hears him and scoffs, I knew I shouldn't have talked to your Baroque a**....
If I find out who stole my copy of MS Office, I'll kill you...
I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom I can tell you I don't have money, but what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you give my MS Office back now that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you, but if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you and I will kill you.
You have my Word!
A husband comes home to find his wife with her suitcases packed in the living room.
Where the h**... do you think you're going? he says.
I'm going to Las Vegas. You can earn $400 for a b**... there, and I figured that I might as well earn money for what I do to you free.
The husband thinks for a moment, goes upstairs, and comes back down, with his suitcase packed as well.
Where do you think you going? the wife asks.
I'm coming with you…I want to see how you survive on $800 a year!!!
I grew up in a really rural environment and my dad always wanted me to embrace eating wild game. His strongest argument was how much money could be saved by eating deer rather than beef, especially deer t**....
They're the cheapest meat you can find, boy. You can always find them under a buck.
A man finds a magic lamp while fishing.
When he rubs it, a genie appears and says: "You have three wishes, but whatever you get, your mother-in-law gets double."
The man asks for enough money to be the richest person.
The genie says: "Done. What do you want for your second wish?"
The man asks for ten dream vacation homes.
The genie says: "Done. What do you want for your third and final wish?"
The man grins and says: "I'd like you to beat me half to death."
Preacher finds a receipt for a$250 dress in wife's purse. ..
You know we don't have money for things like this. She said, but you don't understand...the devil was there and kept telling me how great it looks on me. Then he replied, you should have said Get behind me Satan. She said, I did, but he said it looks even better from back there!
Line in heaven
A woman dies and finds herself in a line to get into heaven. As she nears St Peter she hears him asking people
"Please tell me how much money you made and what you did on earth"
Two people ahead if her she heard "I made 2 million a year and I was a CEO"
The person in front of her said "I made 180 thousand a year and I was an electrician"
When she got there she said "I made 12 thousand a year.. "
St Peter asked "and what instrument did you play?"
Two men are walking when they suddenly find $500 laying on the street
They decide to keep the money for themselves. The first man says: 'We should split it fifty fifty'
The other one replies: 'What about the remaining $400?'