Films Jokes

84 films jokes and hilarious films puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about films that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Looking for a laugh? Look no further than this collection of jokes about films and filmmaking. From making fun of sequels to poking fun of filmmakers, these jokes are sure to bring a chuckle to all movie fans.

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Funniest Films Short Jokes

Short films jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The films humour may include short movie jokes also.

  1. My girlfriend and I went on our 9th date to see the new Batman film. Our dates can be summarized as followed: Dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, BATMAN
  2. My favourite film is The Hunchback of Notre Dame I love a protagonist with a twisted back story
  3. The moon landing was staged The moon landing was staged and it was shot by Stanley Kubrick, the reason it looks so real is because of Kubrick's obsession with filming on location.
  4. The show "COPS" is no longer filmed honoring the longstanding tradition of police turning off their cameras
  5. Apparently Bruce Willis is only going to concentrate on action films from now on... because you know what they say about old habits...
  6. If you give a monkey a typewriter, it will eventually write Shakespeare... ...If you give a monkey a camcorder, it will eventually film a dead body and post it to the internet.
  7. I did an essay on The Room. For school, I had to write an essay based on a film, so I decided to do it on "The Room". I think I did well, because I got a hi mark.
  8. My buddy just lost his job at a cinema that only shows Pixar films... He forgot to show Up
  9. Rick Astley will lend you any of the Pixar films in his collection, except one. He's never gonna give you Up.
  10. I just saw that Harry Potter film. I think its a bit unrealistic if you ask me.. I mean, a ginger kid, with two friends? How?

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Films One Liners

Which films one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with films? I can suggest the ones about fiction and film set.

  1. The 10th Fast and Furious film should be called.... fast 10 Your Seat Belt.
  2. Caitlin Jenner just signed a deal with Marvel. She is going to be in the new Ex-Men film.
  3. What starts with 'p' ends with 'orn' and plays a major role in the film industry? Popcorn
  4. Two mice are chewing on a film roll One says, "I liked the book better"
  5. Can't wait to see Liam Neeson's new film Taken: Out Of Context.
  6. Have you see the film about the guy who can't stop crywanking? It was a tearjerker.
  7. I recently watched a pirated film. On a scale of 1 to 10, I'd give it a 3.14.
  8. what do you call someone who films spices? A cinnamon-tographer!
  9. Last night I paused the film to make a cup of tea. I've now lost my job at the cinema.
  10. Last night I watched the uncut version of the film Scarface. It was called Face.
  11. I'm making a new documentary on how to fly a plane we're currently filming the pilot
  12. What do you call a Swedish spy film? The Bjorn Identity.
  13. Two mice chewing on a film roll One of them goes, "I think the book was better"
  14. What is William Shatner's favorite film festival? *CAAAAAAAAANNES!!!* ^^^^^^imsosorry
  15. Warhorse walks into a bar The barman says "why the long film"

Bond Films Jokes

Here is a list of funny bond films jokes and even better bond films puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Our local cinema is putting on a screening of the new James Bond film especially for dyslexics. Respect
  • There is a reason why Daniel Craig has grey hair in the new James Bond film... ... it's because he's got 'No time to Dye'.
  • What do you call a james bond film about a calculator? Casio royale
  • Why did the producers of 007 films use government debt to fund their newest film? Because interest in the Bond is so low.
  • Did you hear they're making a female Bond Film? It's called 00.77 cents on the dollar
  • What do you get when you cross a cat and an octopus? A mediocre Bond film.

Comedy Films Jokes

Here is a list of funny comedy films jokes and even better comedy films puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • If Adam Sandler, Rob Schneider and Dennis Dugan are in a plane and the plane crashes, who will survive? American comedy films.
  • Did you hear the director planned to film two sequels simultaneously for the Michael J Fox 1980's time travel comedy? He planned to make back-to-back back to the 'Back to the Future' future features!
  • Straight Outta Compton left out Dr. Dre’s history of a**... against women Because they didn't want to turn this drama film into a comedy!
Films joke, Straight Outta Compton left out Dr. Dre’s history of a**... against women

Films joke, Straight Outta Compton left out Dr. Dre’s history of a**... against women

Giggle-Inducing Films Jokes for Joyful Times with Friends

What funny jokes about films you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean video jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make films pranks.

Rick Astley asked for my Disney films the other day.

I said, you can have Cars and Toy Story, but I'm never gonna give you Up.

I should stay up until 3 in the morning more often

I want to make a show with the two actors who have played Khan in the different Star Trek films where we discuss literature. We will call it "Prose and Khans".

My wife is one of those annoying people that ruins films by asking questions.

Last night we were watching Schindler's List and she stupidly asked, "Why are you w**...?".

Does your dog bite?

A man walks in the park and sees a man with a dog sitting on a bench.
"Does your dog bite?", asks the first man.
The man proceeds to pet the dog, but the dog bites him.
"I thought you said your dog didn't bite?!", he says quite angry.
"This is not my dog."
My mom told me this joke, it's from one of the films of 'pink panther'. I've never seen the film though.

Bruce Willis was offered a role in the new Star Wars film, but turned it down to concentrate on action films

Because you know what they say about old habits...

I was talking to my Irish mate about Brad Pitt's films, but I could not remember the name of that historical Greek film he was in.....

"Troy." he said, suddenly.
"I am." I replied. "Give me a minute"

He saved his family three times in the Taken films and got no thanks.

The next one should be called Taken 4: Granted

I agree even in marriage, s**... without wife's consent is r**..., But by same logic isn't spending husband's money by the wife without his consent...Robbery? Why do our films find it funny? How can people joke about it?

My friend keeps hiding Disney films in my lunch.

I'm fed up.

I've seen so many Adam Sandler films...

it's not even funny.

Did you know that all of the Hobbit films were recorded in L.A.

Yeah, you could tell by the Smaug.

I watch doomsday films like there's no tomorrow.

I watch doomsday films like there's no tomorrow.

My gf is one of those people who ruin films by asking silly questions when you're trying to concentrate...

Last night we were watching *Schindler's List* when she leant over and whispered in my ear "why are you fapping?"

What do Batman films and religious farms have in common?

They may have a Christian Bale in them.

I like watching horror films behind the sofa.

That way my neighbours don't know I'm there.

Just seen a Disney trailer.

I've just seen a Disney trailer
It said, "A new movie from the people that brought you Up."
Flipping Heck! I never knew Mum and Dad made films.

Gene Therapy

The act of watching Gene Wilder films to cope with the loss of Gene Wilder.
This is the place for wordplay, right?

I went to see a night of x**... short films!

Imagine my disappointment when it was just 30 Roman movies.

AT&T buying Time Warner has so much unforeseen consequences...

But at least we know DC films will continue to be phoned in.

I once had a guy try to sell me s**... films. I was so incredibly enraged!

Last week he was just GIVING them away.

How many Godfather films are there?

A Coppola 'em.

My wife said she is leaving me because I always mis-quote the Terminator films.

She'll be back.

A man walks into a bar, and sees King Kong having a drink...

Now, the man loves all of Kong's films, so he decides to walk up to him. He says, "wow! King Kong! I'm such a big fan. Sorry to bother you, but do you have time for a photo? "
King Kong suddenly looks up, checks his watch.
He turns to the man and says "sorry, I've a plane to catch".

Why do all mediocre film school graduates make foreign films?

Because they're over C's.

My friend and I recently watched the Star Wars films back to back in preparation for The Last Jedi...

unfortunately I wasn't the one facing the screen.

Did you hear about the gay amnesiac who stared in pornographic films?

He never knew he had it in him

Action films set unrealistic expectations.

I just tried to jump onto a moving train but I destroyed my son's Scalextric.

There is at least one great philosophy in each of Brad Bird's films

The Incredibles: "When everyone's special, nobody is."
Ratatouille: "Not everyone can become a great artist, but a great artist can come from anywhere."
The Iron Giant: "Screw our country, I want to live."

James and giant peach should have been serialized into a number of films.

Dave and the giant strawberry.
John and the giant cantelope.
Your mom and the giant cucumber.

Why are they making so many Fast & Furious films?

So they can make Fast10 Your Seatbelts .

What do you call a lumberjack who directs gothic films?


Called up the movie theater to find out what the order was for the double feature horror films.

It follows It Follows.

Alternate dimensions joke

A man learns how to go into alternate dimensions where he can become other people. He says "This is awesome, I've always wanted to be Arnold Schwarzenegger acting in the Terminator films, but I've also always wanted to compose classical music. So first, I'll be Bach"

What did Buzz say to w**...?

A lot, I mean there were three movies and a couple short films in that franchise.

I told my girlfriend I love Pixar films and I haven't actually got any

I think it's time to own Up.
(Gary Delaney)

Did you all hear Alex Jones likes Transgender Adult films?

Looks like the shoe's on the other futa now!

What do you call an elderly woman who stars in films?

A Geriactress.


They drive a German Car
They go to Irish Pubz
To drink Belgium beer
They get a Chinese Takeaway on the way back
They sit on Swedish furniture
They watch American films
On a Japanese TV
Most of all though they are suspicious of all things foreign
Courtesy of Rick Wakemam who I'm doing lighting for tonight. (super chill guy btw)

TIL There are actually 5 Highlander films, the latest of which came out in 2007. But nobody talks about the 4 sequels because

There can only by one.

I was concerned when I heard Pixar had been accused of placing s**... content in their films

But everyone seems to think it's just Hunky Dory.

I'm pretty sure I've figured out my neighbour's 3 favourite films

* 10,000,000 Explosions
* Army Guys Yelling at Each Other
* Subwoofer: The Movie

Last night, my wife and I watched 4 films back to back

Luckily, I was facing the TV

Best films of all time Lord of the rings and the Hobbit trilogies...

Now that's what I'm Tolkien about.

A man goes to Blockbuster and starts looking at films

He goes through different genres until he stops at superheroes and ask to the shop assistant:
\- Could I rent "Batman Forever"?
And the shop assistant replies:
\- No, Batman returns always to the shop

I watched the Harry Potter films for the first time at the weekend

They were okay, but a bit unrealistic: a ginger schoolkid with two friends?

What's the deal with short films?

I'm so tall that I have to squint to see them!

Arnold Schwarzenegger is retiring from doing films.

He already has a new gig in mind. He wants to be an exterminator.

I liked the Harry Potter books and films but...

I think the character Nearly Headless Nick was a bit poorly executed

A clever Russian is planning on a streaming service exclusively for banned films.

He's going to call it Nyetflix.

I went on a blind date with a fellow movie buff

Talk soon started about our love of the silver screen. She asked if I was in to Indie films and I said" of course they are some of the best!". "ok", she replied, "what's your favourite then?"
"I don't think you can look past Raiders of the Lost Ark personally, but the Last crusade is a close 2nd"

My wife and I watched three films back to back last night….

Luckily I was the one facing the telly

A blonde girl sets out to prove blonde aren't dumb

A blonde girl rents out a stadium and invites as many blondes as she can and sure enough 80,000 blondes fill the stadium and she films it all on live television. She invites a little 4 year old girl out in front of everyone and asks her what's 2+2? The little girl shivers and squeaks out T-three? The crowd erupts yelling Give her another chance! So they do and ask her again what's 2+2? The girl stands there for a moment before answering is it 4? The crowd starts chanting once again Give her another chance!

My next door neighbour has been in a few films

She'll be furious if she ever finds out

Why are there not many films about Abraham Lincoln?

He doesn't do well in theaters.

Films joke, Why are there not many films about Abraham Lincoln?

jokes about films