Fiance Jokes
46 fiance jokes and hilarious fiance puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about fiance that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Do you need a laugh? Look no further than this collection of hilarious 90 Day Fiance jokes. Whether you're a bride-to-be, a stepfather, or just an Emily fan, you'll get a kick out of these jokes.
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Funniest Fiance Short Jokes
Short fiance jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The fiance humour may include short future husband jokes also.
- A million or more lab rats die each year and my fiance screams at me for running over a mouse. That's the last time we're going to Disney.
- My first dad joke as a new father Fiance: "What's the difference between a carousel and a merry go round?"
Me: "I don't know but they have their ups and downs"
...it begins - Getting married next week I told my fiance I'll set a date the day I see the Queen jump out of a helicopter.
- My fiance is talking about having a dream wedding... Thank God it's a dream, I did not want to attend
- My fiance's dad is a priest and he's going to take the bar exam soon. He's going to be a father in law
- If you leave your spouse, you are divorced. If you leave your fiance... You are dis-engaged.
- My fiance asked me what date I'd prefer for our wedding Apparently, "your sister" was not the right answer.
- My fiance thought that all men are trash I told her no, there are only a few garbage men in every town
- I asked my fiance what date she wanted to get married. She said, "How about on 9/11?" "Why in the world would you want to get married on 9/11?"
"So you'll never forget." - My fiance isn't too happy about me referring to her as my alternative second choice... I thought she was my wife 2 b?
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Fiance One Liners
Which fiance one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with fiance? I can suggest the ones about future wife and spouse.
- My fiance left me at the altar... Turns out she wasn't as into human sacrifice as I was.
- My fiance find out about my girlfriend! And now she's going to tell my wife!
- What did Jay Z call his wife before they got married? Fiance
- What do you call Leonardo DiCaprio and his fiance on their wedding day? Bride and Groomer
- What did the sushi say to its fiance? You make miso happy.
- I dumped my blind fiance yesterday. She never saw it coming.
- My friend asked his fiance to marry him with a song. The proposal had a nice ring to it.
- What do you call a black fiance A Beyonce
I'll see myself out - I had a wedding yesterday. No one showed up. Not even my fiance.
- I told my fiance to go stand in the corner when she is cold. Its usually about 90°
- What kind of diamond did Ditka buy for his fiance? Da Beers.
- Why did the watermelon get left at the altar? Because his fiance cantelope.
- What did the watermelon say to her fiance before their wedding? We cantelope
- All my sisters ex fiance smoke p**...... She just couldn't m**... them.
- What did the muslim woman say to her new fiance? j**... me at hello.
Playful Fiance Jokes to Add Joy and Laughter to Your Group
What funny jokes about fiance you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean hubby jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make fiance pranks.
A couple's young daughter went to college.
After 6 months she happily let them know she was engaged to a student who is studying to be a pastor, and is bringing him home for the holidays.
And after the introductions the father and the boy sat and the father asked: " How old are you?"
Fiance:"19"
Father: "And where are you going to live?"
Fiance: "God will provide."
Father: "And where are you going to get money?"
Fiance: "God will provide."
Later that night the mother asked the father: "What do you think of him?"
And the father: "He seems to be a nice guy, he thinks I am God."
I told my fiance that we should get married on a n**... beach.
That way we can really see who the best man is.
My fiance, feeling a bit under the weather, just blurted out this knee-s**... at 3AM...
Why does bill nye get sleepy after writing calligraphy?
Because of the Nye Quill.
A h**... tells his parents he won't marry his fiance because she is a v**....
"If she isn't good enough for her own family, then she isn't good enough for ours!"
So this amputee hadn't told his fiance about his condition yet...
and he kept putting it off. Finally, on their wedding night, in bed with the lights out, he screws up his courage.
"Honey, I have a confession to make."
"What is it, dear?"
Instead of answering, he simply takes his brides hand and puts it on the stump of his leg.
"Well!" she exclaims, "This is a surprise! But I'll get the vaseline and see what I can do."
A man finally got engaged to his dream woman. Eager to show off his new fiance, he took her to his home town.
Upon arrival, he approached his mother and said, I'm going to bring home three girls and I want you to guess which one is my fiance.
Sure enough, twenty minutes later, the man walked in the door with three girls following behind him.
Without a moment's hesitation the mother pointed to the man's fiance and said, It's that one.
Wow! exclaimed the man. How in the world did you know it was her?
The mother shrugged, I just don't like her.
My fiancee keeps yelling at me because Alexa is interrupting her game on the Kindle.
I can't help it. My voice turns her on.
My fiance had a girls day with her sister at the art museum today, and sent me this.
Fiance: "I would take you to an art museum too. But then i couldn't hold your hand"
Me: "Why couldn't you hold my hand?"
Fiance: "Because i'm not allowed to touch the art"
She got me good.
A Young Man Asks His Father About His Fiance
A young man from West Virginia goes up to his dad and says, "Pa, I am really concerned about my fiance."
His dad asks him to tell him what the problem is, he says, "Well Pa, I just don't know what to do, I just found out she is a v**...."
His dad says, "Dump her, if she ain't good enough fer her own kin, she ain't good enough fer ours."
A catholic woman gets engaged
I heard this joke from a father(catholic priest) today.
A catholic woman gets engaged and finds out that her fiance doesn't believe in h**....
She goes to her father and says : "Father, my fiance doesn't believe in h**.... Maybe I should rethink about marrying him".
Her father says: " Don't worry! He will definitely believe after getting married."
My fiancee keeps complaining our wedding cake isn't high enough.
I just know it'll end in tiers.
My 5 year old daughter was a preemie, she was born 6 weeks early, and was 3 lbs even when she was born.
A couple days later, my fiance said that she is definitely my daughter, I asked her why she said that, and she responded with, cause she came early.
fiance: just pretend to be religious for 10 minutes and he'll agree to marry us
me: okay
\[at church\]
priest: it's nice to meet you both
me: \[seeing crucifixion statue on wall\]
jesus what happened to this guy?"
