Feline Jokes

57 feline jokes and hilarious feline puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about feline that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Feline Short Jokes

Short feline jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The feline humour may include short cat fur jokes also.

  1. News has just come in that The mars Rover has discovered a member of the feline species while exploring. Unfortunately, Curiosity killed the cat.
  2. Why don't you want to win an award for Best Feline Sphincter? Because it's a catastrophe :-)
    Yeah, ok, I'll be going now.
  3. BREAKING NEWS: NASA announces Mars Rover discovered new feline-like life form on the Red Planet Unfortunately, it ran over the newly discovered creature. Yes, it seems Curiosity killed the cat.
  4. I wanted to be the first person to invent a feline cloning machine... But everybody said it was nothing but a copycat invention.
  5. What do you call a disobedient feline pirate? A mew-tineer!
    And what do you call a genetically altered cow?
    A moo-tant, of course!
  6. What's the difference between a depressed criminal and a cat cutting down a gumtree with a chainsaw? One's a felon feeling glum, and the other is a feline felling gum.
  7. Did you hear about the dog who tried to dress up as a cat but got sick at a Halloween costume party? He said he wasn't feline well.
  8. My parents weren't supposed to know about my feline thieving hobby. But I guess the cat's out of the bag now.
  9. Took my cat to the vet the other day, he had an upset stomach. The vet asked me whats wrong with the cat,
    I told him he isnt "feline" very good.
    (Im sorry im advance)
  10. It's real hard to be a cat, don't ya know? They aren't always feline it.

    ...I'll see myself out

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Feline One Liners

Which feline one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with feline? I can suggest the ones about cats and kittens and kitten.

  1. What do you call a well dressed feline? Dandy-lion
  2. What do you call a line of iron cats? A Feline...
  3. What is the most common cause of feline blindness? Cataracts
  4. Why did the cat need medicine? Because it wasn't feline too good.
  5. What do you call an unfaithful feline? A cheetah.
  6. I asked my cat, "how are you?" He said he was, "feline fine"
  7. What does a cat say when it's in a good mood? I'm feline great!
  8. What do you call a cat wearing an iron armor? (Fe)line
  9. what kind of church do felines go to A cat-tholic church
  10. What do you call a cat made out of Iron? Fe-line
  11. What do you call a queue of cats at the bank? A feline
  12. What do you call a Jewish feline? A yama-cat
  13. What do feline submarines have? Purriscopes.
  14. If you're not feline well... You should probably call a purramedic.
  15. I hate when people kick my cats! It really hurts my felines.

Feline joke, I hate when people kick my cats!

Entertaining Feline Jokes to Laugh Out Loud Fun with Everyone

What funny jokes about feline you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean cat human jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make feline pranks.

There once was a princess who lived alone with her cat in a castle.

Being her only companion, she loved the cat very much. Little did she know, the cat was actually a handsome prince that had be cursed to live his life as a feline.
Seeing how much the princess loved the cat, the witch that had cursed him turned him back into a handsome prince, so he could spend the rest of his life with the princess.
Upon seeing the handsome prince, he said, "I bet you wish I wasn't fixed now, huh?"

Why did the pet proctologist fear his first feline procedure?

Because wether he succeeded or failed, he knew he'd end up with a cat-a**...-trophy on his hands.

What do you call a deceptive feline?

A lion.
Get it guys lol? Lion ~ Lying
I'll pounce myself out now...

Fortunately my cat Whiskers did not win the feline b**... contest...

We avoided a cat-a**...-trophy

Cats are made of iron, lithium and neon.

Because FeLiNe

They found a cat on mars...

A live cat was found roaming the surface of Mars. Scientists planned to have the Mars Rover capture the animal to study it but unfortunately while attempting to capture the feline, Curiosity killed the cat.

Movies appeal to either dog people or cat people.

For example the Hunger Games has more of a feline nature. There's a certain cat-ness to it.

Scientists at NASA

Scientists at NASA reported today that they had discovered feline life on Mars. Unfortunately, the Mars rover that discovered the specimen also ran over it just minutes later. Said one scientist "We were all really excited until Curiosity killed the cat."

Police investigating the feline corpse discovered in a Zerox machine.....

have said this may be a copy cat killing

What do you call Ironman's cat?

A Fe-line.

What's the difference between between the Sine function and a Tropical forest feline ?

While the first oscillates, the second ocelot

Why did REO Speedwagon have to get rid of their aggressive pet cat?

They couldn't fight this feline anymore.

What do you call a feline sitting in a planter?

A cactus.

The award for Best Feline Behind was a disaster.

...a real cat-a**...-trophy.

Life was recently discovered on Mars.

NASA had recently sent more cameras to monitor the surface of Mars when they came across a creature that they had never seen before. Due to it's large ears and long tail they decided that this was some new form of feline species. However, upon closer inspection they found that this creature was not moving and in fact had large tire marks across it's back. Based on these findings NASA had but one unfortunate observation to make.
"Curiosity killed the cat"

For the second time this month all the animals in a feline cloning facility were killed

Police are looking for a copycat killer

What did the feline say when it couldn't believe what was happening?

You've cat to be kitten me right meow.

I named my cat Boston

he's more than a feline.

Why was the cat happy?

It was feline good...

This feline messed up my clothes

What a catastrophe!

Feline joke, Took my cat to the vet the other day, he had an upset stomach.

jokes about feline