Fees Jokes

Funniest Fees Short Jokes

Short fees jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The fees humour may include short costs jokes also.

1. Just spent $300 on a limousine and discovered that the fee doesn't include a driver Can't believe I've spent all that money and I have nothing to chauffeur it...
2. It was hard to come to terms with the death of my wife. But eventually the hitman and I agreed on a fee.
3. I heard the pope's first choice for a guest was in fact Hillary... But he couldn't afford her speaking fees
4. I saw a missing poster for Schrödinger's cat It had a $500 finders fee if returned dead and alive.
5. Netflix's new subscription fees are so high I've had to stop paying the heating bill, Brings a whole new meaning to Netflix and chill…
6. A boss announces to his staff: I've lost a wallet with 500 dollars, if you find it, I'm offering a 100 dollars finder's fee! A voice in the background says: I'm offering 200!
7. Yesterday I was charged $10,000 dollars for sending my cat into space. It was a cat astro fee.
8. car service outrage I recently paid $300 for a limousine and I just found out the fee doesn't include a driver.
   I can't believe I spent all that money and have nothing to chauffeur it.
9. How can you tell if a letter in your mailbox is a boy or a girl? If it's a bill, it's fee mail.
10. Just got the email "Webinar on how to avoid frauds is cancelled" And the fee is non-refundable.

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Fees One Liners

Which fees one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with fees? I can suggest the ones about fines and tuition.

1. I was recently diagnosed with a fear of giant. Fee-fi-phobia.
2. I've heard that U2 has never paid legal any legal fees Their lawyers all work pro-Bono.
3. What's a crow's favorite drink? CAW-fee.
4. America is a free country! Shipping fees not included.
5. Where do cats stand when they want to buy a train ticket? In the FEE-line.
6. I was invited to a Mexican party, but I had to pay to get in It was a fee-esta.
7. How do philosophers make money? Philoso-fees!
8. I wish prostitutes would learn a lesson from eBay ...and do away with insertion fees.
9. I have a chronic fear of giants. It's a fee-fi-phobia
10. Hillary will give her concession speech... Since somebody paid her $250,000 speaking fee.
11. Why should you always bring money to LBGT pride parades? Trans-action fees
12. How do duck lawyers charge their fees? Bill-able hours
13. How do you call a man working at IRS? A fee-male
14. I tried to put up a photo of myself on eBay... But there were too many sale fees
15. Why did Hillary wait to give her concession speech? She needed time to negotiate her fee.

Lawyer Fees Jokes

Here is a list of funny lawyer fees jokes and even better lawyer fees puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• A man goes to the lawyer: What is your fee? Lawyer says: 1000 US dollars for 3 questions.
  Man: Wow - so much! Isn't it a bit expensive?
  Lawyer: Yes, what is your third question?
• Q: What’s the difference between Personal Injury lawyers and Congress?
  A: No fee–If No Recovery!
• How do you make a group of lawyers to smile for a photo?
  Just say, "Fees."

School Fees Jokes

Here is a list of funny school fees jokes and even better school fees puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I was going to go to Psychic School... ...But I couldn't afford the intuition fee.
  

Laughter Fees Jokes for Everyone for Fun and Frivolity

What funny jokes about fees you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean taxes jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make fees pranks.