Feeling Curious Jokes
18 feeling curious jokes and hilarious feeling curious puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about feeling curious that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Cheerful Feeling Curious Jokes for Unforgettable Laughter with Friends!
What is a good feeling curious joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
Justin Bieber has said, "I feel like the Kurt Cobain of my generation, but people just don't understand me."
By a curious co-incidence, kurt cobain, contacted in a seance, said, "I felt like the Justin Bieber of my generation, so I killed myself."
Man walks into a bar and orders 4 beers.
Drinks them, and leaves.
Next week same time does the same thing: orders 4 beers, drinks them, and leaves.
The third week; same thing. The bartender is curious so he asks. "well, I moved here few weeks ago. Back home my 3 brothers and I met every Thursday after work for a beer. Since I was feeling homesick I figured I would keep up the tradition even if I had to do it alone."
This goes on for several weeks until one week the man comes in and orders three beers and a coke. Bartender says, "I hate to pry but what happened? Did one of your brothers pass away?"
The man chuckles and says, "No nothing like that. I decided to quit drinking."
I've always been curious about synesthesia...
I just want to see how it feels.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Rodeo Position
Two old cowboys are sitting around a campfire and drinking. Somewhat drunk and not in the best frame of mind one turns to the other and say's I miss my missus, but when we make love it's always the same . Somewhat taken aback, but curious nonetheless, the other cowboy asks how's that? We always use the old m**... the old cowboy replies. Thinking about this the other cowboy says If you want some excitement you need to try the Rodeo position . The cowboy says What's that?
Well you start off d**..., behind her. Then you lean forward and with your right hand grab her right breast, and with your left hand grab her left breast, with your face beside her head you whisper gently in her ear, Yep feels just like your sister , and then hold on for dear life.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
On Sunday, I walked into the weapons store one day and noticed a banner advertising sarin gas.
I went up to the cashier and asked, "Isn't this stuff i**...?"
The cashier replied, "This isn't your ordinary sarin. This type helps you lose weight," gesturing towards another banner claiming that inhaling a whiff of it every day would help me lose 50 kilos by the end of the week.
Feeling curious, I bought it and tried a whiff. My nose instantly started running and my eyes watered, but determined, I repeated it each day until the end of the week.
By Saturday I felt like I was going to die, but sure enough, I had lost over 70 kilos.
Truly a weapon of mass destruction.
The Old Fisherman
It was raining hard and a big puddle had formed in front of the little Irish pub.
An old man stood beside the puddle holding a stick with a string on the end and jiggled it up and down in the water.
A curious gentleman asked what he was doing.
"Fishing," replied the old man.
"Poor old chap.." thought the gentleman, so he invited the old man to have a drink in the pub.
Feeling he should start some conversation while they were sipping their whisky, the gentleman asked, "And how many have you caught today?"
"You're the eighth."
My brother told me this. Feels like it belongs here.
A grammar teacher was lecturing his students on double negatives. He explains, "In some languages, take English, for example, if you were to use double negatives, it is the equivalent of a positive. It isn't considered proper grammar for that reason."
A student raises his hand. "Like in Algebra?"
"Exactly. However, in other languages, like Russian, a double negative is still a negative. For those of you who are curious, there is no language where a double positive equals a negative."
A student piped up in the back. "Yeah, right."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A barber is telling his customer about the stupidest kid he knows..
He tells him, "I tell everyone about this kid and what a m**... he is. Every time he comes by I offer him two quarters OR a single dollar bill. He takes the quarters every time...never learns."
Right as they're talking the kid walks by the window. The barber knocks and waves him in. The kid walks up and the barber offers him two quarters or a dollar bill. The kid takes the quarters and leaves.
"You see that? Every single time! I feel sorry for our future." says the barber.
Curious, the customer chases the kid down and asks, "Why do you take the two quarters? You know one dollar is worth more, right?"
"Of course I do, but the day I take the dollar, he'll stop paying me"
A doctor is getting ready to deliver a baby.
A doctor is getting ready to deliver a baby and the husband walks in. He says he's always wondered what child birth felt like.
The doctor says that they are testing an apparatus that would share the pain with the father.
He agrees and continues with the procedure.
The doctor first puts the pain at 10% the man feels nothing. He turns it to 25% still nothing. He puts it on 50% nothing. The doctor is getting curious wondering if the device works at all. He turns it to 100% and still nothing. The mother doesn't feel a thing.
After birth is all done they wrap it all up and go home.
When they arrive at home, the mailman is lying on the front lawn. The mailman says. 'I feel like I've just given birth.'
>I don't know if this has been posted before but this was my fathers favorite joke.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Blow
So, I was in a bad situation, lost my family, home, all of my money, I needed some cash. Due to this I decided to try my hand at burglary. Thinking big and ambitious I headed to London, to break in to some big mansions there. Finally got it all planned and found the perfect house. Night descended, sure the house was empty, I entered. No problems. Looking through the property I found lines of powder on the coffee table in the living room. Feeling c**... and curious I had a sniff. Amazing. Definitely good Blow. Went down for another line and I heard a deep cockney voice at the other side of the room.
"What are you doing?"
I looked up. "Oh my God" I said "Its Michael Caine!".
"No." He replied. "That's my c**...."
Help me finish a joke?
I don't even know if this is the right place for this, but I'll try it and see what happens...
This sounds ridiculous, but here goes. In a dream last night, I told a joke. I don't exactly remember all of it, and woke up towards the end. But I like the setup. Please take a look at the part that I'm able to remember and add your own interpretation. Feel free to change anything you need in order to make the joke better.
Also, if there's a better place for me to post this, please let me know.
Here's what I remember...
Three ducks are out swimming, heading "somewhere", when they come across a magic lamp. The first duck rubs the lamp and a genie pops out. The first duck asks the genie for a quicker way to reach "somewhere". With a clap of the genie's hands, a rowboat appears in the lake.
The ducks row for a while, but they get tired. The second duck rubs the lamp, and again, the genie pops out. The second duck says the boat is nice, but asks for a quicker way to get "somewhere". Again, the genie claps his hands, and an outboard motor appears at the back of the rowboat. They fire up the motor and get moving.
That's what I remember telling in the dream. I'm just curious what you all can come up with based on that. Change whatever you like, but would appreciate if we could keep the ducks, the genie, and the rowboat please. Thanks for reading.
Why did the BMX date the motorcycle?
He was feeling a bit bike-curious.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man goes to a community gym...
He sees a sign for a weight loss program which says, "Lose 5 pounds in one week!". Curious, he signs up for the program. He begins the program the next day and upon entering the designated area finds an attractive woman with a sign on her shirt that says,"If you catch me, you can have your way with me. You have 30 minutes." He chases her around the area for a week and sure enough loses 5 pounds.
Wanting to lose a bit more weight though, he decides to try the next level of the program. This program guarantees he'll lose 15 pounds in a month. He gets to the designated area and once again a smoking h**... with a sign saying,"If you catch me you can have your way with me." Runs around while he chases her for 30 minutes. This goes on for a month and he loses 15 pounds.
Feeling extra confident and wanting to look his absolute best for a college reunion coming up in two months, he signs up for the highest level of the course. It guarantees he'll lose 50 pounds in 2 months. He gets to the designated area and upon closing the door turns around to see a 300 pound man of pure muscle with a sign that says the following:
"If I catch you, I have my way with you."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Nineteen!
A guy gets fired from his job, and as he's walking home, head down, he hears someone yelling "Nineteen! Nineteen!" He looks around, and some w**... is jumping up and down in the middle of the street, pumping his fist in the air. "Nineteen! Nineteen!" Curious and with nothing better to do, the man walks over and asks him what's going on.
"Oh, I do this every day," the w**... says cheerfully. "It's great! You should try it."
"Nah... I just got fired and I really don't think anything can cheer me up."
"C'mon, just give it one try."
So the guy reluctantly agrees, stands next to him and half-heartedly jumps in the air, saying "Nineteen."
"No, no, you have to really commit to it. Like this: NINETEEN! NINETEEN!"
"OK, fine... Nineteen! Nineteen! ... You know, this really is making me feel better! NINETEEN! NINETEEN!" Just then, he makes an extra-high jump, and the w**... quickly bends down and yanks the manhole cover out from under him. "AAAaaaaaahhhh...." *splash*
The w**... puts the manhole cover back, looks around, jumps up in the air and yells "TWENTY!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An older man goes to see his doctor...
...for a physical. The doctor tells the man the results are fine and asks him how he is doing.
"I feel great!" he replied, "God and I have made a really strong connection lately."
The doctor find this a little odd, but is respectful and asks "How so?"
The man says "Well, when I wake up to pee in the middle of the night, God turns on the light for me. And when I'm done, he turns it off again."
Now the doctor is curious as to what the man is talking about. He sends him on his way and calls the man's wife.
"Hello ma'am this is your husbands doctor. His checkup was fine, however he said something strange about God turning the light on when he gets up to pee in the night, and turning it off again when he's done."
The wife sighs and says, "d**... he's peeing in the fridge again."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Curious
A young boy walks in to the kitchen one Sunday morning while his dad is reading the newspaper.
"Where does p**... come from?" He asks.
The father feeling a little agitated that his 5 year old son is already asking difficult questions thinks for a moment and says:
"Well you know we just ate breakfast?"
"Yeah," answers the boy.
"Well the food goes into our tummies and our bodies take out all the good stuff, and then whatever is left over comes out of our bums when we go to the washroom, and that is p**...."
The little boy looks perplexed, and stares at him in stunned silence for a few seconds and asks: "And tigger?"
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Feeling Curious One Liners
Which feeling curious one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with feeling curious? I can suggest the ones about intrigued and feeling lucky.
- I've always been curious about synesthesia... I just want to see how it feels.
- Why did the BMX date the motorcycle? He was feeling a bit bike-curious.