Following is our collection of funny Favourite jokes. There are some favourite catchphrase jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these favourite common puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
It's where I flip your MOM over
Ba na na na na na na na na na na na na na grapefruit.
A mathematician and an engineer are living together in a dorm when a fire starts in their room.
The mathematician wakes up and sees the fire. He quickly scans the room and sees a fire extinguisher and goes back to bed, happy knowing a solution exists.
The engineer wakes up, sees the fire and uses the extinguisher to put it out.
A man walks into a bar and orders a drink.
Upon receiving his drink he mutters: 'all
lawyers are assholes.'
A guy down the bar angrily yells: 'HEY!'
'Oh I'm sorry, are you a lawyer?' The man replies.
'No I'm an asshole!'
Space is limited
In a haiku, so it's hard
To finish what you
My new vegetarian girlfriend cooked me one of her favourite dishes last night.
"What are these little round things", I asked.
"Have you never seen a chick-pea before?", she said.
"Of course I have, my last girlfriend was up for anything, but that doesn't answer my question".
FLY, YOU FOOLS!
Jenny walks into the doctor's office for a checkup, and the doctor needs to check her heartbeat.
"Pull your sweater up real quick, and I'll use the stethoscope.
There we go, thank you. Big breaths, Jenny."
"Yeth, I know, and I'm only thixthteen!"
Dear Sir,
We are writing to you because you have violated copyright ...
The New York Jets ( Ν‘Β° ΝΚ Ν‘Β°)
Who is the Australian Frankesntein's favourite singer?
Rihanna, mate.
You can explore favourite bestest reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean favourite calibri dad jokes. There are also favourite puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
A blow up doll
White vans.
I splatter all over her face and watch her struggle to get out of the car!
Maybe Alaska.
A: Miscarriage
This joke never gets old, just like the baby.
P, because without it they're irate
I'm not sure I'll be able look at him in the same light ever again.
Mein Kraft.
Command Alt Right.
So a woman is in the hospital, having just given birth to twins. The midwife appears at her side and gravely says that she has some good news and some bad news. The woman asks for her to get the bad news out of the way. "Well," the midwife says, "unfortunately one of the children is ginger".
The Mother laughs and says, "Well then, whats the good news?"
"Its dead", the midwife says.
11 because it has another 1.ο»Ώ
I replied, "Up, yours?"
My dad gave me a weird look and said, "No need to be like that, I was only asking."
A student puts up his hand and says 'G'. The teacher walks over to him and says, "Why is that, Angus"
Apparently Caitlyn Jenner was inappropriate.
Molasses.
What's a pirate's favourite architectural feature?
An *arrr*ch.
What's a pirate's favourite place to play?
A p*arrr*k.
What's a pirate's favourite thing to do to women?
Rape.
I never understood why society romanticises pirates.
I love a protagonist with a twisted back story
My favourite day of the year.
That's when I realized he was her favourite twin.
Two wind turbines are in a field when one turns to the other:
He says: "What's your favourite type of music"
The second one says: "Actually I'm a huge metal fan"
Mein Kraft
Dear Customer,
Due to recent illegal activities that have been performed through your connection, your internet service has been permanently disconnected.
-Sincerely, your ISP.
The pcp was my favourite.
My sense of fashion is second to nun.
I'll show myself out.
The bark.
What's my bank's favourite part of the tree?
The branches.
What's my elephant's favourite part of the tree?
The trunk.
What's my father's favourite part of the tree?
The leaves :(
My 3 favourite things are eating my family and not using commas
"What's a pirate's favourite crime?"
"Arrrrson," I said, chuckling at my cleverness.
"You idiot," he replied, "it's obviously Piracy."
British English: I think you're having problem understanding these words.
American English: no u
You'd think it'd be R, but 'tis the C his heart truely belongs to.
My ex-girlfriend used to give me nicknames whilst giving me head.
"The Impaler" was my favourite.
Well, at least, that's what I thought she said....
Turns out she's asthmatic and it's my fault she died.
Its when I flip your MOM.
But they are a solid #2.
They told me, He doesn't count!
I replied, I assure you, he does.
It means a great deal to me.
I try to use it as often as possible
I hate it more than red and blue combined.
HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!
It's my cake day humour me.
Q: What gets bigger, the more you take away from it?
A: A hole
Q: What two words have thousands of letters in them?
A: Post office
Q: The maker doesn't want it, the buyer doesn't use it and the user doesn't see it. What is it?
A: A coffin
Q: What travels all over the world, but stays in the corner?
A: A stamp
Q: What runs all around a field, but doesn't move?
A: A fence
Q: What starts with E, ends with e and only has one letter in it?
A: Envelope
"That puppet from Sesame Street", I replied.
They told me he didn't count.
I said, "I beg to differ...".
One turned to his friend and asked, What's your favourite music?
The other windmill said, I'm a big metal fan.
Crack open a boy with the cold ones.
Until my mother hid his urn away from me.
Credit. Sandi Toksvig
Purrrrrr-ple
High fives all round!
(pause for everyone saying aRrrrrrr)
No, it be the C
Until my mother took the urn from me
Police Headquartersβ¦..
You think it would be the R, but he's really fond of the C.
His first love is the C.
Because theyre tubular, dude.
I received such a satusfying groan. Thats why i do this job.
I said, Up. Yours?
He said, Wow! That's super rude.
Benjamin Franklin was a great American President.
He said "Whodini"
They're my favourite band so I wanted my photo taken with them.
That's me in the corner.
Synonym Rolls
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the favourite loved jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working favourite popular piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.