Favorite Color Jokes
92 favorite color jokes and hilarious favorite color puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about favorite color that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Favorite Color Short Jokes
Short favorite color jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The favorite color humour may include short favourite colour jokes also.
- Color vs Colour, Favorite vs Favourite, Neighbor vs Neighbour British English: I think you're having problem understanding these words.
American English: no u - Green is my favorite color. Green is my favorite color. I love it even more than blue and yellow combined.
- What did Pete Townsend say when Roger Daltrey told him that he'd lost his favorite old lime-colored belt? "Relax. It's only a green, aged, waistband."
- I'm torn: on the one hand, I absolutely hate xenophobia, sexism, and racism on the other hand, orange is my favorite color.
- The artist jumped from a bridge, carrying all of his favorite paints and pastels. At least he passed with flying colors.
- A good way to start a conversation is 'What's your favorite color'. A good way to end a conversation is What's your favourite colour of a person.
- I like average colors. My favorite is medi-ochre.
- Q: What is a black cat's favorite color?
A: Purrrrrr-ple! - What's a frat bro's favorite color? Natty White
- What's a Greek's favorite color of sky? Golden Dawn
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Favorite Color One Liners
Which favorite color one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with favorite color? I can suggest the ones about yellow color and orange color.
- Purple is my favorite color! I like it more than blue and red combined.
- Whats a fedora clad, neck bearded gentlemen's favorite color? M'genta
- Green is my favorite color. I like it better than blue and yellow combined.
- What's Helen Keller's favorite color? Corduroy.
- What's a cats favorite color? Purrrple!
(Told by my 5yo niece.) - What's a sailor's least favorite color? Maroon
- What’s a librarian’s favorite color? Read.
- What is a telephone's favorite color? Green green, green green
- From my 10 yr old daughter: What's a cats favorite color? Purrrrrple.
- What is a Vietnamese's favorite color? Not orange.
- What was Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.
- What is Stevie Wonder's favorite color? Felt
- What's a cats favorite color? Puuuuurple.
- On a scale of 1-10... What's your favorite color of the alphabet?
- What is a cat's favorite color? Purrple
Favorite Color Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about favorite color you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean hair color jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make favorite color pranks.
Q: What's Barney's favorite movie?
A: The Color Purple.
Russian President Putin called President George W. Bush with an emergency:
"Our largest c**... factory has exploded," the Russian President cried.
"My people's favorite form of birth control. This is a true disaster!"
"Mr. Putin, the American people would be happy to do anything within their power to help you," replied the President.
"I do need your help" said Putin. "Could you possibly send 1,000,000 condoms as soon as possible to tide us over?"
"Why certainly! I'll get right on it,"said Bush.
"Oh, and one more small favor, please?" said Putin.
"Yes?"
"Could the condoms be red in color and at least 10" long and 4" in diameter?" said Putin.
"No problem," replied the President.
Mr. Putin hung up and started laughing with his aides about how those s**... Americans will fall for anything.
George hung up and called the President of a c**... company. "I need a favor, you've got to send 1,000,000 condoms right away over to Russia."
"Consider it done," said the president of the c**... company.
"Great! Now listen, they have to be red in color, 10" long and 4" wide."
"Easily done. Anything else?"
"Yeah," said the President, "print 'Made in America, size small' on each one!"
You're a r**... if:
-You have more fingers than you do teeth
-You cut your grass and find a car
-You consider Denny's a Fancy Resturant
-Your best Suit contains more than 5 colors
-Your age is higher than your I.Q.
-Your favorite pickup line is "Does this look infected to you?"
-You ask your wife whether the spot on your neck is a boil or a mole and she replies "It's a gummy bear."
-You have a family reunion and everyone in town shows up.
-You say "Watch this" every time before you goto the hospital.
-Your wife and ex-wife are sisters.
What is a blonde's favorite color? Glitter.
My (blonde) sister hates blonde jokes. I (redhead) told her I have a redhead joke for her. She was eager to hear it!
A redhead goes for a drive through the country, just enjoying the peaceful ride with her windows open. She has to stop as a shepherd is moving his flock across the road. The redhead gets out of her car to stretch and has an idea.
"Hey Mister! If I can guess how many sheep you have, may I keep one?"
The shepherd has hundreds of sheep and feels confident enough to agree. The redhead looks over the flock and says, "361." The shepherd is stunned that she guessed correctly but, being a man of his word, allows her to pick out her favorite. The redhead is about to put her new pet in her car when the shepherd calls out to her.
"Hey Lady! If I can guess your real hair color, may I have my dog back?"
My sister was not amused.
What's a Triceratops' favorite instrument?
Triangular prism glass. It adores the colors.
Russian Condoms!
President Boris Yeltsin called Clinton with an emergency: "Our largest c**... factory has exploded!" the Russian President cried; "my people's favorite form of birth control! This is a true disaster!" "Boris, the American people would be happy to do anything within their power to help you," replied the President. "I do need your help," said Yeltsin. "Could you possibly send 1,000,000 condoms ASAP to tide us over?" "Why certainly! I'll get right on it!" said Clinton. "Oh, and one more small favor, please?" said Yeltsin. "Yes?" "Could the condoms be red in color and at least 10" long and 4" in diameter?" said Yeltsin. "No problem," replied the President and, with that, Clinton hung up and called the President of t**.... "I need a favor....you've got to make 1,000,000 condoms right away and send them to Russia." "Consider it done," said the President of t**.... "Great! Now listen, they have to be red in color, 10" long and 4" wide." "Easily done. Anything else?" "Yeah," said the President, "print 'MADE IN AMERICA, SIZE SMALL' on each one.
My Personal Favorite Little Johnny Joke
One day in class the teacher brought a bag. "Now class, I'm going to reach into the bag and describe something, and you tell what I'm talking about. Okay, first: it's round, plump and red."
Of course, Johnny raised his hand high, but the teacher, wisely ignored him and picked Deborah, who promptly answered "An apple." The teacher replied, "No Deborah, it's a beet, but I like your thinking." Now for the second. It's soft, fuzzy, and colored red and brownish."
Well, Johnny is hopping up and down in his seat trying to get the teacher to call on him. But she skips him again and calls on Billy."Is it a peach?"Billy asks."No, Billy, I'm afraid it's a potato. But I like your thinking,"the teacher replies. Here's another: it's long, yellow, and fairly hard."
By now Johnny is about to explode as he waves his hand frantically. The teacher skips him again and calls on Sally. "A banana," she says. "No," the teacher replies, "it's a squash, but I like your thinking."
Johnny is kind of irritated now, so he speaks up loudly. "Hey, I've got one for you teacher; let me put my hand in my pocket. Okay, I've got it: it's round, hard, and it's got a head on it." "Johnny!" she cries. "That's disgusting!" "Nope," answers Johnny, "it's a quarter, but I like your thinking!"
What's a s**... addict's favorite color?
Orangey.
A few days before Christmas, a man enters a pet store looking for a unique gift for his wife.
The store manager tells him he has just what he's looking for! A beautiful parrot named Chet that sings Christmas carols. He brings the husband over to a colorful but quiet bird.
The man agrees that Chet certainly is pretty, but he doesn't seem to be much for singing. The manager tells him to watch as he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a lighter.
The manager then clicks the lighter and holds it under Chet's left foot. Immediately Chet starts singing; "Silent Night, Holy Night."
The husband is very impressed with Chet's singing abilities and watches as the manager moves the lighter underneath Chet's right foot. Chet now starts to sing "Jingle Bells, Jingle All the Way."
The husband says Chet is perfect and that he'll take him. He rushes home to his wife and insists upon giving her this wonderful gift immediately. He presents Chet and starts to explain the parrot's special talent.
Demonstrating, he holds a lighter under Chet's left foot and the bird sings "Silent Night." He then moves the lighter under the right foot and Chet lets loose a round of "Jingle Bells."
The wife is absolutely impressed, and with a mischievous grin asks her husband what happens if he holds the lighter between Chet's legs instead.
Curious the husband moves the lighter between the bird's legs, and the bird begins to sing "Chet's nuts Roasting on an Open Fire!"
I've always enjoyed the mind control jokes. Do you know any?
Here's a couple of my favorites:
Ask someone to:
Spell "roast."
Spell "coast."
Spell "most."
Then ask them: What do you put in a toaster?
(The answer, is "bread.")
Another: What does M-A-C-D-O-N-A-L-D spell? (MacDonald)
What does M-A-C-G-R-E-G-O-R spell? (MacGregor)
What does M-A-C-H-I-N-E-R-Y spell? (machinery, not Mac Hinery)
One more that always worked for me:
Point at a piece of paper and ask "what color is that?"
Answer: "white"
Spell "silk"
Now ask: "what do cows drink?"
They usually answer "milk!"
No, they drink water!
What is Miley Cyrus's favorite color?
Twerquoise
I asked a freezing Indian man what his favorite color was.
He replied, "Brrrrrrrrrrrrrr-ghundi".
What was the favorite color of h**...'s cat? (OC)
Purrussian Blue
Q: on a scale from 1 to 10, what is your favorite color in the english alphabet?
A: Yes
What's a Le Gentleman's favorite color?
M'agenta
What is a Frenchman's favorite color?
Sacré Blue
What's a narcissist's favorite color?
Reflection
What's a poops favorite color?
Turdquoise
Black and Blue
A new widow, upon learning that her late husband had been dressed in a black suit for burial, told the f**... director she wanted a blue suit instead; it was his favorite color and she would pay extra for the change.
On the day of the f**..., there was her husband in his coffin with a form-fitting blue suit.
Afterwards, she asked the undertaker about the extra charge. He replied, No charge. Glad to do it for you! You see, the same day you asked me about that, another man's body arrived, wearing a beautiful blue suit. I asked his widow, and she wasn't particular about the suit.
So I switched the heads.
What is a neckbeard's favorite color?
M'genta
Whats Your Favorite Color?
Solve the quiz or die.
What's the favorite color of horses?
Horse ræddish.
What's a blonde's favorite color?
A light shade of clear.
What is Rick Grimes' favorite color?
Coral.
What's a s**...'s favorite color?
Whorange
A mother has 3 kids
A mother has 3 kids.
The first kid goes up to her mom and says,
"Mommy, why I am I named petal?"
The mom responds, "Because when you were born, a petal fell on your head."
The second child goes up to her mom and says, "Why am I named Rose?"
The mom says, "Because when you were born, a rose fell on your head
Finally, the third child comes up and says, "My favorite color is potato."
"SHUT UP BRICK"
What's a dog's favorite color?
Woof
How to trigger a Canadian
My favorite color is gray.
Offensive Names of Colors
Post your favorite inappropriate name for a color below.
(I. E. Affirmative Action Black, Abortion Red, a**... Asphyxiation Blue.)
What was Helen Keller's favorite color?
Black.
(Yeesh)
What was h**...'s favorite color to use when painting?
a**... white.
Three men are being interviewed for a job at the same time
The interviewer says "Alright, you can get the job if you can come up with a sentence with the words green, pink and yellow."
First man replies "Well that's easy, my favorite colors are green, pink and yellow."
Interviewer smiles and says "You're hired!"
The second man scoffs and says "I saw a bird that was green, pink and yellow."
Interviewer says "You got it!"
Finally, the third man thinks for a while until he says "The phone rang green green, I pinked it up and said yellow!"
The end.
What is a color blind person's favorite soda?
Big Green
What's your boss's favorite color?
Pink...
What is a Cajun's favorite brand of colored pencils?
Creola
What's a straight C student's favorite color?
Mediochre.
Why is Neapolitan ice cream a racist's favorite flavor?
Because the colors are already segregated.
A kid asked his mother why his sister was named rose.
His mother replied to him, explaining that roses were her favorite color.
He then asked her the same question in regards to his own name.
"You'll get it when you're older, Richard," she responded.
E: I know I said color instead of flower, but I am leaving it.
Is your favorite color Grey?
Because I've seen 50 Shades too many...
What's a Starbucks employee's favorite color?
You think it'd be green, but it's actually... brew.
What is Tim Tebow's favorite glow in the dark color?
Knee-on green
What's a pig's favorite color?
Ma-HOG-any
My favorite color is money !
What's Helen Keller's favorite color?
Velcro
(sorry if this is offensive)
What's a mailman's favorite color?
Depends on the guy.
What's Iron Man's Favorite Color?
rgb(254, 254, 254).
What's Stalins least favorite color?
Tsartreuse
By asking 4 questions i can tell what your zodiac sign is
1. What's your favorite color?
2. What's your mother's maiden name?
3. What's your social security number?
4. What's your birthday?
An art student showing off their fanart at a Comicon...
An art student showing off their fanart at a Comicon is discussing their work with a customer, and comments: "I know I overuse red and blue, but I can't help it, it's my favorite color pair!"
A passerby asks: "Oh, is it?", and is then brutally executed by the surrounding nerds.
Four surgeons are talking...
Four surgeons are talking about their favorite types of patients to operate on.
The first surgeon says he prefers to operate on librarians, because when you open them up everything is in alphabetical order.
The second surgeon says he likes to operate on accountants, because everything inside is numbered.
The third surgeon says his favorite are artists because everything is color-coded.
Finally the last surgeon says nah, you are all wrong politicians are the easiest, because they are brainless, gutless, heatless, and lack a spine.
Four surgeons
Four surgeons sit around discussing their favorite patients.
The first surgeon says, "I like operating on librarians. When you open them up, everything is in alphabetical order".
The second surgeon says, "I like operating on accountants. When you open them up, everything is in numerical order".
The third surgeon says, "I like operating on electricians. When you open them up, everything is color coded."
The fourth surgeon says, "I like operating on politicians."
The other three surgeons look at each other in disbelief.
The fourth surgeon continues, "Because they're heartless, gutless, spineless, and the a**... and head are interchangeable."