Fashion Week Jokes
10 fashion week jokes and hilarious fashion week puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about fashion week that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Fashion Week Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good fashion week joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Don't Ever Let Him See You Completely n**...
The young bride's mother had some old-fashioned ideas of
marriage, and passed them on to her daughter.
"Never let your husband see you in the n**...," she advised. "You
should always wear something."
"Yes, mother," replied the obedient girl.
Two weeks after the wedding, the girl and her brand-new husband
were preparing to retire when the guy asked, "Dear, has there
ever been any insanity in your family?"
"Not that I know of," she answered. "Why?"
"Well, we've been married for two weeks now and every night
you've worn that silly hat to bed."
"How can you watch Victoria Secret Fashion Week but still claim you love only me?" My wife asked
" The same way I watch Formula One whole weekend but still drive my trusted 2012 Toyota Camry everyday" I replied..
That satisfied her...
I just failed to mention I take rental at Enterprise when I go on business trips
What do you call a skeleton in fancy attire?
Fashionably late.
I'll be here all week.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I recently traveled through time to hook-up with Queen Victoria, the famous n**...-queen of England in the late 1800's.
I was stunned to find out that she wanted me adorned in the latest fashions before we consummated our tri-millenium tryst. She made me wait until I grew large mutton-chop side-burns and a moustache. It took like three weeks. Meanwhile, she had a high fastening and tight fitting frock coat cut to my size with tailored shirts having high upstanding collars tied at the neck with large bow-ties. Finally, after a month, I'm adorned in the finest haberdashery of the day when I come to find out, it is now her time of the month. Since I looked like any gentleman of the era, we had period s**....
In which month is the NYC fashion week?
Fabruary, of course.
A man walks into a bar and orders three drinks.
The barman serves him and then watches as the man alternates between each drink until all three are empty.
"Why do you drink them in that fashion?" asks the barman.
The man replies "I have two brothers, and they've both recently moved away. One is in Portugal, and the other is in Peru. But we've decided that we should still all drink together once a week, so right now my brothers are doing the exact same thing."
The barman, thinking it a wonderful idea, happily prepares the three drinks week in week out.
Then, one day, the man walks in, picks up two of the drinks, walks slowly to his table, and starts drinking.
The barman instantly knows exactly what this means and approaches the man's table and says "I'm terribly sorry for your loss."
The man replies "Don't worry, my brothers are fine. I just decided to quit drinking."
One for us old guys
Lady opens a house of ill repute and hired 3 girls to work for her: a fashion model, a telephone operator and an elementary school teacher. She figured the model would be the most popular with the guys as she was so much prettier, followed by the operator then the teacher who was rather a plain Jane. To her surprise, after the second week, most of the guys wanted to see the teacher. Lady decided to stand out side the girl's doors and eaves drop on them.
She heard the model say, don't mess my hair, don't mess my makeup. She heard the operator say, you three minutes are up, deposit another $5.50 (told you it was for the old guys). BUT when she listened outside the teacher's door, she heard," I don't care how many times it takes, you are going to do it over until you get it right!"
The preacher arrived at church...
...muttering angrily under his breath.
"Goodness, what's wrong?" asked his secretary when he came into the office.
"It's raining like crazy out there," said the preacher, "and I can't find my umbrella! I had it here at the church last week, and I think one of the congregation must have stolen it. Well, I'm not gonna stand for it! This morning I'm gonna give an old-fashioned fire and brimstone sermon reminding them of the fiery fate that awaits sinners! It'll put the fear of God in them! Then I'll recite the Ten Commandments, and when I get to the one about stealing, I guarantee the thief will break down and beg for my forgiveness!"
An hour later, after the service, he came back to the office.
"Did it work?" asked the secretary? "Did the thief confess when you got to the commandment about stealing?"
"No," said the preacher. "When I got to the one about adultery, I remembered where I left my umbrella."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Man with the Tiny Head
A man walks into a bar, seemingly normal sized body, but he has what can only be described as a head so tiny, it was unfit to be on top of his neck. He goes up to the bar and orders a drink. The bartender says, "Drinks are on the house if you don't mind me asking what is wrong with your head."
The man stares at him slightly and says, "I was stranded on an island, my plane had crashed. A few days in I found an old fashioned bottle and when I picked it out of the sand, a beautiful genie appeared. I still can not forget her, her beauty was indescribable. She said to me that she would grant me any wish I desired. I, of course, wanted to go home, but this woman was unlike anything I had ever seen before and I had been away from my wife for several weeks. I asked her to have s**... with me and she said she was sorry, but she did not grant wishes for s**... and that I had to wish again."
"So, what did you do?" asked the bartender.
"I did what any man would do." said the man. "I looked her straight in the eye and said if we can not have s**... then how about just a little head instead?"
Wouldn’t it be great if men were made by Kodak!
They would automatically shut off when they weren’t being used.
You wouldn’t have to wait for them to recharge after each shot.
They last longer and come with a warranty.
You can try them out first for a two-week trial period and return them if not satisfied with no risks or hassle.
They exist to capture the moment, not ruin it.
They come in fashion colors.
You can keep them in maximum zoom.
They come with replaceable or adjustable parts.
The parts that count are portable.
They don’t mind over-exposure.
They respond to the slightest touch.
The one you want is available at a KMART near you.
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