Far Cry Jokes
13 far cry jokes and hilarious far cry puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about far cry that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Far Cry Short Jokes
Short far cry jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The far cry humour may include short far side jokes also.
- Caught my Vegan roommate... Caught my Vegan roommate crying today while chopping onions. These people are taking it too far now!
- My dad keeps quoting Far Cry 5. "The father is coming" he says... Well i wish he would, I've been on my knees for 20 minutes now.
- I heard that milk helps babies grow but I don't think it's true I've lured three cartons over mine and all it's done so far is cry
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Far Cry Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about far cry you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean fright jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make far cry pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A co-worker found out I'm 'semi-retired.' "What's that like?" he asked.
"It's like being semi-e**.... It ain't too hard, but you still can't do what you want."
Original content, as far as I know. I actually said this at work today. We laughed and laughed. Then I cried a little.
Anyone there?
Once upon a time there was a female brain cell that by mistake happened to end up in a man's head.
She looked around nervously but it was all empty and quiet.
"Hello?" she cried, but no answer.
"Is there anyone here?" she cried a little louder, but still no answer.
Now the female brain cell started to feel alone and scared and again she yelled:
"HELLO, IS THERE ANYONE HERE!!?"
Then she heard a voice from far, far away:
"Hello! We're down here..."
Inuit and American tourist walks near far-north village.
Suddenly the polar bear starts chasing them. American starts crying, Inuit starts to warm up and takes running position.
American - What are you doing? Don't you know, that polar bear runs faster than any human? We can not outrun polar bear!
Inuit - I don't need to outrun the polar bear, I need to outrun you
An antivaxxer mom comes home one day...
...to see (or not see, rather) her son, which would usually be playing video games in the living room.
After a couple of minutes of searching far and wide, she had never thought to check his room.
When she opened the door, she saw him silently crying with his face buried in his pillow.
She tapped his shoulder and shook it, before she asked, 'What's the matter? Why are you crying?'
Teary-eyed and tired, the 6 year old boy replied,
'I'm having a midlife crisis.'
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I used to be a huge fan of tractors.
When I was younger I loved them in all shapes and sizes. This was until I went to the county fare when I was 10, and the farmer refused to let me sit in his tractor. I ran home and cried my eyes out, tore all the tractor posters off my wall and that was that.
11 years later standing in the doorway of a night club, surrounded by smokers my friend leans across to me and says:
This smoke is really unpleasant
I open my lungs, s**... up all the smoke and exhale it far in the other direction.
He says: Wow, how did you do that?
To which I reply: I'm an ex-tractor fan
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A lady on the beach
There was a lady lying on the beach one day who had no arms and legs. Whenever a handsome fellow would walk by her though she would start crying, and eventually one stopped and asked her "what is wrong?"
She replied with "Since I have no limbs, nobody has ever hugged me before."
The man feeling bad picks her up and gives her a long and very satisfying hug. As he sets her down and starts to leave, she starts crying again. So he asks her again "Lady, what is wrong?"
She replied with "Since I have no limbs nobody has ever kissed me before."
The man then kisses her very romantically and loving. Though as soon as he gets up and leaves she starts to cry again, and he asks her "Lady, what is wrong now?"
She replies "I have never been s**... before."
So the man picks her up and carries her into the ocean and tosses her as far as he can. Then he says "Well, you are now."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two rich men and a t**... are on top of a building...
...and the two rich men decide that they will each throw a coin off the top of the building, and see who collects it at the bottom. The first man throws a silver coin, but it does not go very far. The second man goes, "Hah! I bet I can throw farther than you!" and throws another silver coin, a bit farther. The t**... says,"I am sure I can throw a bomb farther than the both of you." He then proceeds to lob his bomb a lot further than the other two men.
Once the men get down, they decide to see what happened to the coins and the bomb. At the place where the first man's coin landed, they see a boy crying. "What's wrong?", they ask. The boy replies,"Daddy got killed by a silver coin from the sky!" The two men shrug, and keep on going. They get to the place where the other man's coin landed, and see a girl crying on the sidewalk. "Whats wrong?" they ask again. The girl sobs, "We were outside walking and grandma got hit on the forehead by a silver coin and died!" The two men shrug again and walk off to the place where the bomb landed, expecting a whole family to be in tears. However, when they get to the place, they see a boy laughing his head off in front of a smoking crater, with his dad scratching his head in the background. "What in the world happened here?", asked the businessmen. The boy replies, "Daddy f**... and the house blew up!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A priest and a nun are playing golf...
The priest is on the putting green and is an avid golfer. He lines up his shot and swings...and the ball goes far left.
"GOD d**...!" shouted the priest.
The nun, horrified, says "Father, you can't do that, that's offensive". And the priest, looking down, apologizes and asks for her forgiveness.
Once again, he walks up to the ball, lines up his shot, swings, and once again the ball misses the hole. "GOD....d**...!" screamed the priest as he threw his putter on the ground.
"Father!" said the nun, "You are taking the lords name in vain, that is a sin. You are a representative of the church you musn't do that.
And once again the priest says "Sorry. Forgive me".
"Well just try to let it not happen again" said the nun
The priest grabs his putter, lines up his next shot, misses, and screams "GOD d**...!"
The nun cries out "Father! That is enough! You are commiting a sin you are personally offending me, you are taking the lords name in vain. Never do that again"
The priest says "You're right, if I say that again, may the lord strike me dead"
And after a nod of approval from the nun, the priest takes another swing, misses once again, and screams "GOD d**...!"
Just as he says it clouds swell overhead and a powerful bolt of lightening comes down and strikes the nun dead. And the priest heard this big booming voice say....
"OH, GOD d**...!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A young man was showing off his new sports car to his girlfriend.
She was thrilled at the speed. "If I do 200mph, will you t**... clothes?" he asked. "Yes!" said his adventurous girlfriend. And as he gets up to 200, she peeled off all her clothes. Unable to keep his eyes on the road, the car skidded onto some gravel and flipped over. The n**... girl was thrown clear, but he was jammed beneath the steering wheel. "Go and get help!" he cried. "But I can't. I'm n**... and my clothes are gone!" "Take my shoe", he said, "and cover yourself." Holding the shoe over her p**..., the girl ran down the road and found a service station. Still holding the shoe between her legs, she pleaded to the service station proprietor, "Please help me! My boyfriend's stuck!" The proprietor looked at the shoe and said, "There's nothing I can do...he's in too far."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A young man was showing off his new sports car to his girlfriend.
She was thrilled at the speed.
"If I do 200mph, will you t**... clothes?" he asked.
"Yes!" said his adventurous girlfriend.
And as he gets up to 200, she peeled off all her clothes.
Unable to keep his eyes on the road, the car skidded onto some gravel and flipped over.
The n**... girl was thrown clear, but he was jammed beneath the steering wheel.
"Go and get help!" he cried.
"But I can't. I'm n**... and my clothes are gone!"
"Take my shoe", he said, "and cover yourself."
Holding the shoe over her p**..., the girl ran down the road and found a service station.
Still holding the shoe between her legs, she pleaded to the service station proprietor, "Please help me! My boyfriend's stuck!"
The proprietor looked at the shoe and said, "There's nothing I can do...he's in too far."