Fallen Jokes
112 fallen jokes and hilarious fallen puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about fallen that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Get your laughs with this collection of fallen jokes about trees, angels and more. See how these lost characters stumble and saps get Shamus'ed. Read on to experience the side-splitting humor!
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Funniest Fallen Short Jokes
Short fallen jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The fallen humour may include short falling jokes also.
- Why was my post removed Can someone from admin please explain to me why my post was removed?
I'm really annoyed about this because now my fence has fallen over. - Why was my post removed? Can anyone tell me why my post was removed?
I'm a bit annoyed by this because my fence has fallen over. - Yesterday, I got so depressed.. ..I spent entire day listening to Celine Dion records.
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Or that's what I thought until I realised my cat had fallen in to the dryer. - What does a push up bra and a dictatorship have in common? They both oppress those on the inside. They both lie to those on the outside. And they both raise monuments to the fallen.
- There is really no easy way to say it, ma'am, but your son has just fallen into the Eyjafjallajökull.
- I've fallen in love with a pencil and we're getting married. I can't wait to introduce my parents to my bride 2B.
- An old grape farmer There was once an old grape farmer who had went through many droughts. When his grapes had fallen and dried, all he could've said was "Everything happens for a rasin"
- Can anyone tell me why my post was removed? I'm really annoyed as my fence has now fallen down.
- Every morning on my way to work, I slip on the frozen newspaper left outside my front door. I must have fallen on some hard Times.
- Talk about coincidence BBC NEWS: Three Cliff Walkers have fallen to their death on an expedition....
Can't believe they all had the same name.
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Fallen One Liners
Which fallen one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with fallen? I can suggest the ones about falls and falling faster than.
- I've just fallen through the roof of a French bakery... Now I'm in a world of pain.
- Caesar is dead The Romaine Empire has fallen, Lettuce pray
- What did the horse say when it fell over? Help I've fallen and I can't giddyup
- The egyptian man wouldnt admit he'd fallen in a river I guess he was in de Nile
- I have fallen in love with a font It's a bit of a Times New Romance.
- I'm in love with gravity I've fallen for it many times
- How do the fallen avengers talk to each other? snapchat.
- Scrolling this sub is like fixing a fence that's fallen. Repost. Repost. Repost.
- I've just fallen over on the pavement. I've left a review on Trip Advisor.
- Why did Satan need life alert? Because he had fallen, and could not get back up.
- What did the horse say when it fell? I've fallen and I can't giddyup!
- What do you call a chickpea that's fallen in love with another chickpea? A hummousexual.
- How did the man feel when he dropped his tube of toothpaste? Crest-fallen
- What did the horse say when she fell down? Help! I've fallen can't giddy up!
- What do you call a robot crab that has fallen into disrepair? A rustacean.
Fallen Tree Jokes
Here is a list of funny fallen tree jokes and even better fallen tree puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I tried being a fruitarian I tried being a fruitarian, it is where you only eat things that have fallen from trees. I only lasted one day. All I ate was 3 apples and an owl. (Joe Lycett)
- I tried being a fruitarian That's where you can only eat things that have fallen off trees.
I managed one day, I had 3 apples and an owl - Yurt? Something Uncle Bobby yells down to you after you've accidentally fallen from the tree stand while hunting big game bucks in the heart of the forests of Appalachia.
- Limbless man found stuck inside fallen tree Police are stumped
- What do you call a fallen tree in a forest? Natural log.
Sorry about the math joke. - Physics would have been much more easier if the TREE instead of the APPLE would have fallen on Newton
- What do you call a tree that you cannot climb? The one that's fallen to the ground.
Fallen Angel Jokes
Here is a list of funny fallen angel jokes and even better fallen angel puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- :Girl, you look like an Angel fallen from Heaven. :Awwn, that's sweet.
:Nah, you literally are Satan. - My pick-up line "Hey girl are you a fallen angel? Because your face looks like it hit concrete."
- why did the fallen angel end up as a domestic help? she was maid in heaven
Fun-Filled Fallen Jokes to Make You and Your Friends Chuckle & Giggle
What funny jokes about fallen you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean falling tree jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make fallen pranks.
Heard my neighbor having s**... for what seemed like ages last night. Lots of moaning, groaning and b**... the headboard off the wall!!!
Turns out her elderly mother had fallen over, cracked her head and was knocking on the wall with her stick for her help. Now I kinda feel guilty about fapping.
The Horse and the Chicken
One day the horse and the chicken were walking along the road near the farm, merrily chatting away. Suddenly, the horse fell into a muddy hole and couldn't get out.
"Help help Chicken! I've fallen and I can't get out of this hole!", the Horse yelled. "Don't worry," said the chicken. "I'll just get the farmer's BMW and pull you out!"
The chicken did this, and all was well. The following day, without thinking the chicken fell into the same hole.
"Help help Horse! I've fallen into this hole and I can't get out!"
The horse smiled and said, "Don't worry Chicken. Just grab a hold of my w**...!"
"What?!?"
"Well, when you're hung like a horse, you don't need BMWs to pick up chicks."
I said, "Did it hurt?"
She looked puzzled, so I continued. "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?" She lifted her head slightly and whispered, "Please... call... an ambulance..."
That's when I looked up and realized she's actually fallen out of a window.
A woman in Atlantic city was losing at the roulette wheel...
When she was down to her last ten dollars, she asked the fellow next to her for a good number. "Why don't you play your age?" he suggested. The woman agreed, and then put her money on the table. The next thing the fellow with the advice knew, the woman had fainted and fallen to the floor. He rushed right over. "Did she win?" he asked. "No," replied the attendant. "She put ten dollars on 29 and 41 came in."
Why didn't Toronto's mayor tell us earlier about his drug use?
It must have fallen through a crack.
Falling off Bed
A lunatic falls off his bed. He quickly gets up. 10 minutes later, he falls again. He thinks to himself "Good thing I got up 10 minutes ago, or I might have fallen on myself"
A hiker stuck on a branch
A hiker slipped over the edge of a cliff, and would surely have fallen to his death except for a branch he managed to grab, just a few feet from the top. He clung there in t**... and yelled, "Help! Can anybody hear me?" A booming voice said, "I am God. Just let go of that branch and I'll catch you." There was a long silence until the hiker hollered, "Can anybody else hear me?"
An elderly man was driving along the highway and was pulled over by a police officer.
The policeman told him that several miles back, the passenger door had opened and the man's wife had fallen out of the car. The man looks over to the passenger seat and says, "Well thank God -- I thought I'd gone deaf!"
A group of priests stand by the road...
... holding a sign "IT'S NOT TOO LATE TO TURN BACK. THIS PATH IS DOOMED!!" Most people just drive by but then suddenly someone stops and yells at the priests: "No one will belive this religious b**...! You're wasting your time!" After that one of the priests says: Maby we should just write "The bridge has fallen!"?
Made the mistake of letting my east coast newspaper freeze on the steps this winter...
I've fallen on some hard Times.
The Rock and Roll Hierarchy has fallen
The King has left the building, Queen has bit the dust, and now the doves cry for their Prince.
A woman who has just given birth has fallen into a coma.
After 7 months the mother finally awakes and asks the doctor about her baby.
Doctor: Good news, you had twins! a boy and a girl. They are healthy, luckily your brother named them for you.
Mother: Oh no, not my brother! he's so s**...! What did he name my daughter?
Doctor: Denise.
Mother: well that isn't so bad, and what did he name my son?
Doctor: Denephew.
Everyone mourns our fallen heroes...
But I'm the only one who cried when I dropped my deli sandwich
Breaking news: Trump has fallen into a wishing well.
I am as surprised as you are. I had no idea they actually worked.
Why did the horse get life alert?
Because "i've fallen and can't giddy-up"
Bob suddenly realized his wife had fallen off her horse
Which was quite a relief as just an hour ago he'd thought he'd gone deaf
I saw an electronic sign that said 'Check Your Speed' in flashing lights.
Lucky I did, it had almost fallen out of my pocket.
Just last week a smiling barack obama overpaid for hot dogs at my stand, but kindly insisted I "keep the change, son, I don't want it"
It was at this moment I realized how far our beloved president had truly fallen.
A boy has reportedly fallen off a building whilst on l**...
People say he "had a bad trip"
Curiosity
I walk past a mental Asylum every day and yesterday as I neared I could hear them chanting "Seven..Seven..Seven." This continued as I walked along the wooden fence and I found myself looking for a gap to see what was going on. About 100m down the fence i spotted a hole where the knot had fallen out and hurried towards it. I jammed my eye up to the hole, rather excited to see the ruckus and a finger sprung out and jabbed me in th eye. "Eight..eight..eight."
"We're going to be together for the rest of our lives!" smiled my wife as we flew on our dream vacation to Hawaii...
"You seem pretty sure of yourself." I replied.
"I am!" she said, gazing out the window. "The left wing's fallen off and the engine's on fire."
I went to the local liquor store on my bicycle the other day
I bought a nice bottle of scotch and put it in my basket.. I was afraid that if I fell over the bottle might break so instead of risking it I drank the bottle right there.
Turned out to be a smart thing to do because I must have fallen 12 times on my short way back home..
California hasn't fallen into the sea, so apparently it worked.
Back in the 1970's there was a cult in California who believed that they could save California by appeasing the San Andreas. There were parts of San Andreas that literally gaped open wide, and members of the cult were noted for throwing all their earthly possessions down into the amazingly deep cracks in the Earth's crust. Of course, skeptics accused the cult of being merely generous to a fault.
Have you ever fallen in love with a magnet?
I hear they're quite attractive.
Last night, my daughter shouted downstairs, "Dad! My tooth has just fallen out into my drink!" "That's great, darling!" I said. "Put it under your pillow and see what happens."
A few minutes later she shouted, "Nothing's happened dad and now my bed is completely soaked!"
A husband is admitted to the hospital...
He has fallen very ill and his future is unsure. He says to his wife, "honey, if I die, I think you should marry Hank from down the street."
"Hank?" the wife questions, "I thought you hated him?"
With his last breath the husband replies "I do"
I heard the woman in the apartment next door having s**... last night
She was moaning and groaning and they were thumping against the wall.
Turns out her mother had fallen and broken her hip and was hitting the wall with her cane for help.
Now I feel sorta bad for m**... so many times.
What did the old man say to the prettiest nurse at the nursing home?
"Help! I've fallen for you and I can't get it up!"
Respect for the fallen
I once dated a girl with a tattoo of a poppy on her backside.
It was in memory of all those who had died at the front.
I called my repairman to complain about a faulty icemaker that had been leaking ...
When he came back out to the house, he discovered it was just some ice that had fallen and melted on the floor. I offered my apologies for the mistake. The repairman told me not to worry, as far as he was concerned, it was water under the fridge.
Two olives are sitting on a bench,
one falls off. The other olive says, "Are you ok?".....the fallen one responds, "O-live"
I love animals. Yesterday I saw a baby bird that had fallen from its nest up in the tree.
I wanted to get the bird back up in the nest so it can be safe. It only took me three throws.
- Stollen from Norm's new show.
I found a baby bird the other day
The other day I found a baby bird that had fallen out of its nest.
I love animals, and I thought to myself 'I'm going to get this little guy back to its nest'.
Now, it took me about 5 or 6 throws...
Cr
A man is at boating school, and is learning different phrases before he is allowed to work on a boat
The instructor asks him the first question, What do you say when a man has fallen off the boat.
The man energetically said, Man overboard!
The instructor has his next question ready, What do you say when a woman falls off the boat?
The man yet again states, Full speed ahead!
Last night I rode my bike to the liquor store
... and bought a bottle of whisky. I put the bottle in the bike basket but before riding back I thought: what if I fall down for some reason? The bottle will break! So I drank the whole bottle of whisky before riding home.
And thank God I did, because I must have fallen down about a dozen times before I got home.
There is a new site for senior citizen dating.
Its called "I've fallen in love and I can't get up."
I was told some bad news last month. A good friend of mine had fallen into an upholstering machine and suffered terrible injuries.
The good news is he's now fully recovered
Sean Connery had fallen on hard times. His work had completely dried up.
Then one day out of the blue his agent rang and said "Sean, I've got a job for you. It starts tomorrow, you've got to get there early, for 10'ish." Sean frowned "For 10'ish? But I havent even got a racket!"
Bra Sazes
Have u ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and H are the letters used to define bra sizes but couldn't figure out what the letters stood for? Well its time you became informed!
(A) Almost b**....
(B) Barely there.
(C) Can't Complain!
(D) Dang!
(DD) Double Dang!
(E) Enormous!
(F) Fake.
(G) Get a Reduction.
(H) Help me, I've fallen and I can't get up!!!
Can one of the Mods please explain to me why my post was removed?
I'm really annoyed about this because now my fence has fallen over....
I'm surprised the tower of pisa hasn't fallen over during the pandemic
Without all those tourists helping hold it up.
Some people say DJ Khaled fell off
If he really had fallen off, we'd have felt it.
Every morning on my way to work, I slip on the frozen newspaper on my front step.
I have fallen on some hard Times.
A poem
In days of old
When Knights were bold
And toilet lights were dim
You'd hear a splash and then a shout
'Oh no! He's fallen in'
A soul is sent to h**....
"Get me the manager! I demand to know why I am in h**...!" the soul shouted.
The fallen angel sighed. "We rebelled against God."
"That's no reason to punish me!"
"You do not understand. You were not sent here to be punished by us. You were sent here as punishment to us."
I bought my nephew a pair of airpods for his birthday.
The kid was so ungrateful, he didn't even say thank you. He just started throwing up gang signs at me.
I think he's fallen into a bad crowd ever since he went deaf.
This is Captain Leonardo Ricardo speaking,
On behalf of my crew and I, I'd like to welcome you on board flight 633 from New York to Abu Dhabi. We are on the air above 38,000 feet across Atlantic Ocean.
If you you look outside the window, you will see that the wing has fallen off and the engine is on fire. If you look down the window, you will see a little yellow boat on the ocean. Inside the boat are 3 people waving at you, that's me, the Co-pilot and your Air hostess.
This is a recorded message. Have a good flight!
What do you call a dad who has fallen through the ice?
A Popsicle
In 2024 Al Gore decided to run for president again.
His campaign hinged on a song he made to promote the dangers of global warming. It was so popular it became a meme.
After a while, everyone was talking about Al Gore, and, sure enough he became President.
When asked on the News, "How do you think he won," two fallen YouTubers stated, "You can't beat the Al Gore Rhythm."
The Italian Mother
Giuseppe excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in love and that he is
going to get married.
He says, "Just for fun, Mama, I'm going to bring over three women and you
try and guess which one I'm going to marry." The mother agrees.
The next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house, sits them
down on the couch and they chat for a while.
He then says, "Okay, Mama, guess which one am I going to marry?"
Mama says immediately, "The one on the right."
"That's amazing, Mama. You're right. How did you know?"
Mama replies: "I don't like her."
What's the difference between a bra and a ambulance
An ambulance takes care of the wounded while the bra takes care of the fallen
A husband and wife are sitting on the couch watching TV.
The wife looks at the husband and he is staring at the ceiling above her head.
She looks up and asks "What are you staring at?"
A spider, he replies.
I don't see anything.
Oh, it must have fallen on your head, he says calmly.
The wife jumps up screaming.
The man says, While you're up, you mind getting me another beer?"
Kevin and Jake had fallen on bad days. Finally, they resorted to theft.
They decided to break into a millionaire's house the following night. Inside the house, Jake accidentally dropped a goblet, which shattered. The noise woke someone up. "Who's there?" the voice demanded. Jake had the presence of mind to reply "meow." After grabbing his fill, Jake slipped out into the darkness, but Kevin was not satisfied. He wanted more. As Kevin searches for more loot, he accidentally knocks a chair over. The voice demanded once again, "Who's there?" "This is another cat," replied Kevin.
Can the mods of this sub explain as to why my posts were removed?
Now my fence has fallen over….
The wife says I'm no longer allowed to help in our search for a new apartment as my suggestions are always "disgusting".
In my defence, the last place I found was in a great location in the centre of town and it did say "TO LET".
How was I supposed to know the "I" had fallen off?
What would a horse say if it tripped and fell over?
Help, I've fallen and I can't giddy-up!
A chat server has been opened for world leaders to talk to one another,
and the world has fallen into chaos and Discord.
Why was the fallen branch so confident?
Big Stick Energy
A squad of potatoes is engaged in a firefight after being sent to secure several important roads...
Gunfire and explosions are raining down on the group of potatoes until it's only the sergeant on his radio and a couple of others standing over the crispy skins of their fallen comrades. The General's voice suddenly blares from the radio...
"Sergeant, come in! What is your status, are the routes safe?"
"NO SIR, THE ROOTS ARE NOT SAFE - AND WE'RE DROPPING LIKE FRIES!"
