Faith Name Jokes
10 faith name jokes and hilarious faith name puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about faith name that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Faith Name Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good faith name joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
The Lost Bible
One day a devout preacher lost his favorite Bible while he was at a spiritual retreat in the mountains. He was devastated, and began to lose his faith. Three weeks later, a dog walked up to him after church service, carrying the Bible in its mouth. The preacher couldn't believe his eyes.
He took the precious book out of the dog's mouth, raised his eyes heavenward and exclaimed, "It's a miracle!"
"Not really," said the dog. "Your name is written inside the cover."
I once met a member of the Catholic faith who could only face North, East, South and West...
His name was Cardinal Directions
American policemen beaten Chinese tourist after asking him for his name...
"I lost faith in humanity", said Fak Yu from the hospital.
I used to believe in things like faith and destiny...
...then I realized those are just stripper names.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A young man becomes a born again Christian after reading a religious flyer at his college.
He doesn't initially tell his girlfriend, justifying the embarrassment as natural to any young infant in the faith. But in the following weeks his commitment escalates dramatically, and he takes up a position as a Christian m**... to Uganda.
One day the dreaded phone call wakes him up. Observing the name a few moments as the device vibrates with a strangely irritated tone, he hastily prepares what he will say to his girlfriend.
Hi Susie, he blurts. I can't see you anymore. I'm in a m**....
Pinwheel Smith
A woman arrives at the Pearly and meets Saint Peter. She says, "I was supposed to look up my husband when I got here." Saint Peter asks, "What's his name?" She answers, "Smith." Saint Peter replies, "I've got hundreds of thousands of Smiths here, could you narrow it down a little?" She responds, "His name is John Smith." Saint Peter says, "I got thousands of John Smiths here, could you narrow it down a little?" She answers, "He's got red hair." He replies, "I have hundreds of red haired John Smiths here, could you narrow it down a little?" She responds, "Well, he told me to always remain faithful to his memory, or else he'd roll over in his grave!" Saint Peter says, "Oh, you mean Pinwheel Smith!"
An Asian woman on a plane sees her Asian seat-mate reading a book on Asian Stereotypes.
A little offended, yet equally curious, she asks her seat-mate "What does the book say?"
Her seat mate says: "According to this book, Filipino women are beautiful, Japanese women are smart, and Vietnamese women are faithful".
Taken aback by the slightly chauvinistic and stereotypical nature of the book's assertions, the woman asks: "Are these based on facts?"
Her seatmate says: "Not exactly, but these haven't been disproved either." He then turns to the woman and asks, "What's your name, by any chance?"
The woman thinks for a bit, and says "Maria Nguyen-Suzuki"
A woman arrives at the Pearly Gates...
...and meets Saint Peter. She says, "I was supposed to look up my husband when I got here."
Saint Peter asks, "What's his name?"
She answers, "Smith."
Saint Peter replies, "I've got hundreds of thousands of Smiths here, could you narrow it down a little?"
She responds, "His name is John Smith."
Saint Peter says, "I got thousands of John Smiths here, could you narrow it down a little?"
She answers, "He's got red hair."
He replies, "I have hundreds of red haired John Smiths here, could you narrow it down a little?"
She responds, "Well, he told me to always remain faithful to his memory, or else he'd roll over in his grave!"
Saint Peter says, "Oh, you mean Pinwheel Smith!"
Which car will you get in heaven?
Three guys are standing in heaven, their names are Greg, James, and Tony. They are at a car dealership, and an angel asks them "were you faithful to your wives?" Greg answers "yes, I never cheated on my wife." He is given a new Lamborghini. The angel then asks James if he ever cheated on his wife. He says "once, and I am ashamed to admit it." He is given a Toyota Corolla. The angel then asks Tony, and he says "yes, lots of times." He is given an old Morris Marina.
A few days later, Tony sees Greg sitting on a park bench, and Greg is crying. Tony Asks Greg "you were given a Lamborghini the other day, why are you crying?" Greg responds "I just saw my wife, they gave her a pair of roller skates."
A Punny way to die
Fred was at his local pub complaining about his neighbour when Artie the landlord takes him to one side. He explains that he used to be in the SAS and for a price he can "make people disappear", it will simply be £5,000 and a deposit.
Fred agrees that he should go ahead but he only has £1 to his name before he gets paid out for his job the next week. As they've known each other for years Artie takes the £1 as a deposit as a gesture of good faith.
The next night Artie follows the victim into a local supermarket where he waits until they are in an isle alone and he strangles the man to death. Turning to leave he spies a shelf stacker who saw everything, he panics and strangles the poor worker too, causing too much commotion to stay hidden he runs out of the store and is captured by the police several blocks away.
The headlines the next morning read:
*Supermarket Shock: Artie Chokes two for a pound!*
...
...
...
I'll show myself out.
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