Failed Marriage Jokes
10 failed marriage jokes and hilarious failed marriage puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about failed marriage that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Failed Marriage Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good failed marriage joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
Guys, if your marriage fails don't just blame her. It takes 2 people to make a toxic relationship.
Blame her and her mother.
After 3 failed marriages, an old woman decides to try an online dating site..
She sets up an account with all her info and says she is looking for "a man who will not beat me, Will not walk all over me, and is great in bed." After 2 weeks no one has replied. Then, one day some one rings the doorbell. The woman gets up and opens the door to see a man with no arms and no legs sitting there. He says "Hello, I'm here about your online dating profile." the woman says to him, "well I want a man who won't beat me.." the man says "I have no arms, therefore I can not beat you." the woman says "well I want a man who won't walk all over me." the man replies "I have no legs, so I can't even walk." the woman says "well, I want a man who's great in bed.." the man replies "hey, I rang the doorbell didn't I?
My pirate friend's marriage is failing, his wife and him don't see eye-to-eye
But, I'm hoping they can patch it up...
It took me almost a decade of marriage and several failed attempts of trying to realise it
Im not capable of making dad jokes
How many children does it take to save a failing marriage?
Zero.
Why did the topologist's marriage fail?
He thought that arbitrary unions were open.
How are babies made?
When a mummy and daddy love each other very much the get married, and when that marriage is failing they have a baby. That's where you come in.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
It's finals week and it's okay if you're gonna fail a course or two
Because you'll still have a more successful career than Kim Kardashian's marriage
What get wetter the more it dries?
A woman in a failing marriage doing the laundry.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The best marriage jokes
A woman got married, but her husband was abusive. She got remarried and that husband ran out on her. She got married again and that husband failed in bed. Finally, she put an ad in the paper: "Looking for a man who won't a**... me, won't leave me, and won't fail me in bed." The next day, the doorbell rings. There is a man with no arms and no legs. "Hello, I saw your ad in the paper," he says. "Tell me a little about you." "Well, I have no arms, so I can't hit you. I have no legs, so I can't run out on you," he replies. "How do I know you're good in bed?" she asks. He says, "I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"
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