The Best 56 Eyebrows Jokes

Following is our collection of Eyebrows jokes which are very funny. There are some eyebrows frown jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these eyebrows eyelashes puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Funny Eyebrows Jokes and Puns

My wife is really self-conscious about how thick her eyebrows are

I told her she's crazy; most women would kill for *half* her eyebrows

I told my friend she drew her eyebrows on too high...

She seemed surprised.

Vow of Silence

Chap decides to to join a monastery. As a novice he is only allowed to speak two words to the prior, once every 7 years.

The first seven years go by and he whispers, "Cold floors..."

The next seven years go by and he whispers, "Bad food..."

Seven more years go by and he croaks, "I quit!"

The prior raises his eyebrows and replies, "I'm not surprised. You've done nothing but complain since you joined."

I forgot to pluck my eyebrows while getting ready this morning.

It was an oversight.

I told my girlfriend she was drawing her eyebrows too high...

She looked surprised.

I told a girl she had drawn her eyebrows on too high...

She looked surprised.

The eyebrows agree that they deserve a raise

The eyebrows agree that they deserve a raise.

They say to the man, "hey, we've done exactly what you've asked for years with little compensation. We deserve a raise!"

The man looked surprised.

The eyebrows said, "Thank you."

The Town's 90 year old Duan Juan is asked of his seducing methods...

"What's so special 'bout you that makes women 70 years younger than you crave your company, if ye know what I mean?"

"I honestly got no clue young man"-He answered, as he began to
slowly lick his own eyebrows.

A girl in a club...

A girl in a club said to me, "Did you know that you can tell the colour of someone's pubes by the colour of their eyebrows?"

"I think I've heard that, yeah."

"And I've got no eyebrows, so what does that tell you?"

"Going by the rest of your face, have you been in a fire?"

I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high.

She seemed surprised.

I can't follow these instructions on how to apply fake eyebrows

They are way over my head

You can explore eyebrows wigs reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean eyebrows pubes dad jokes. There are also eyebrows puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

A bunch of rocks go to a bar...

The bartender sees them as they come towards him to order drinks, and notices that they are have crystals inside them.

'Where y'all from?' the bartender asks

One of the rocks steps up. 'We're from the local quarry a few blocks away.'

The bartender raises his eyebrows.

'Sorry, we don't serve mine ores.'

I told the cashier that her eyebrows were drawn too high

I guess she didn't realize because she seemed pretty surprised.

inspired by the girl who was surprised after drawing her eyebrows too high

I tried to tell this foreign exchange student that she drew one of her eyebrows higher than the other, but I don't think her English was very good because she looked confused ​

I was on a date.

"How many ladies have you slept with?" she said.

I said, "Do you want me to round it to the nearest 10?"

She raised her eyebrows and said, "OK..."

I said, "Zero."

My friend shaved her eyebrows and has been drawing them on. Lately, she's been drawing them too high.

When I told her, she looked surprised.

millennial superstitions

If your phone drops in the toilet bowl, you will have seven years of frustrating eyebrows.

I saw a woman in the supermarket pick up her kids by the hair

Certainly raised a few eyebrows

I told my wife she was applying her eyebrows too high

She looked surprised.

I told my wife she drew her eyebrows too high

She told me she's tired of my repost BS and divorced me. It was definitely a surprise.

I used to be a plastic surgeon

Which raised a few eyebrows.

I had a friend who used to draw on her eyebrows.

One day, she accidentally drew them to high. When I told her, she looked surprised.

"Why does that guy always get all the women?"

"I don't know...he isn't very handsome or rich"

"And he's a terrible conversationalist - all he does is sit there licking his eyebrows"

I told my gf she drew her eyebrows too high

She looked surprised

Some one shaved my eyebrows

I was not surprised.

2 year old son spits on the floor.

Wife: We don't spit. If it's in your mouth you swallow it.
Husband raises eyebrows.
Wife: You shut up!

I've got a business

Ooh what's your business?

We do facelifts.

And how's that going for you?

Well, we're raising a few eyebrows...

(You get the format, now hit me with your best!)

I've noticed that women are natural born artists

From drawing eyebrows to drawing conclusion.

I told a girl at work she drew on her eyebrows too high.

She seemed surprised.

I said to my wife; "You've drawn your eyebrows too high."

She looked really surprised!

I once knew a girl with no eyebrows.

she had a hard time expressing herself.

I told my wife she'd painted her eyebrows too high this morning

she looked surprised

A man brings his 12 year old daughter to the doctor.

He tells the doctor he needs birth control for his daughter.

Raising his eyebrows the doctor replies "Is your daughter sexually active?"

The man replies, "Sexually active? No. She usually just lays there and cries."

I shaved off a friends eyebrows a couple weeks ago, he was surprised apparently...

...I couldn't tell.

Two pancakes were talking. One said to the other, waggling his eyebrows suggestively, "hello."

The other said "ugh, get away from me, you crepe."

When my wife was putting on her makeup, I told her that she had put too much arch in her eyebrows.

She looked surprised.

I made a very tasteless joke at an alopecia convention...

...fortunately it didn't raise any eyebrows.

I told my wife she drew her eyebrows on too high...

..She seemed surprised

We call rings in ears earrings, in eyebrows eyebrow rings and in noses nose rings. Why don't we apply the same to fingers?

And with this fingering I give you my hand in marriage....

A small, plain looking guy is sitting by himself in a bar.

All evening girls walk up to his table, talk to him for a bit and then they both head out the door and come back 30 minutes later.
Another guy, getting no action at all, beckons over the bartender and asks if he knows what the guy's secret is.
"Beats me" says the bartender. "All he does is sit there licking his eyebrows."

Bassists are like eyebrows

You dont notice them until they're gone

-Did you shave my eyebrows while I was sleeping???

+You don't look surprised

I told my wife she'd painted her eyebrows too high this morning

I don't know if she agreed but she seemed surprised

A guy notices a crowd of women at the end of the bar

Curious, he walks toward the end and sees an immensely ugly guy being hit on by several ladies. He sits next to another fella and asks "So, what's this guy's deal? Is he rich or famous?" "Dunno," says the other guy, "he just sits there licking his eyebrows."

I told my friend

that she had pencilled in her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.

My girlfriend started crying because I called her fake

So I wiped away her tears and accidentally her eyebrows too

-Dad! You shaved my eyebrows while I was sleeping?

-Yes, and you don't seem surprised

I told my ex that she had drawn her eyebrows on too low today

She just scowled at me the entire time

My sister started using a pencil to do her eyebrows.

It looks a little sketchy.

Bank Teller: "Sir, your account is overdrawn."

Me: "So are your eyebrows, but you made it work, didn't you?"

We can all agree that segregation was wrong and separate but equal was horrible. But we can all agree it works wonders...

On eyebrows.

My grandpa was telling me about when he used to hunt tigers.

He said, "this one time I was alone in the jungle when out of the bushes, right in front of me, a huge tiger leaped out suddenly and went RRROOOOAAAAAARRRRR!!!!!!! Kid, you won't believe it, I shat myself."

I raised my eyebrows. "You bet I believe it, I'd have shat myself too if that happened to me."

"That's not what I mean goddamnit, go fetch me some toilet paper."

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows on too high

She looked surprised

Dave was doing push up in a garden noticed a man intently observing him...

Dave raised questioning eyebrows, the man said sorry to break it to you buddy but woman under you have long gone.

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.
She looks surprised.


I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high.

She seemed surprised.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the eyebrows shave jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working eyebrows eyelid piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes