Eye Spy Jokes
7 eye spy jokes and hilarious eye spy puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about eye spy that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Eye Spy Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good eye spy joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
A Russian spy ship was spotted off the U.S coast...
But don't worry - they're just keeping an eye on their investment
I spy with my little eye.
A kid terrified with my literally little eye.
I spy with my little eye nothing because I only have two normal-sized eyes.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Superman was cruising the stratosphere
...when he spied Wonder Woman apparently sunbathing n**..., lying on her back on a remote beach. Admiring her stunning beauty, he thought to himself, "I bet I could fly down and with my super speed, have my way with her and be gone before she noticed a thing." So he flew down and 10 milliseconds later was gone. Wonder Woman opened her eyes, raised her head a little and said, "What the h**... was that?"
The Invisible Man said, "I don't know but it sure tore up my a**...."
A man loses his eye in a car accident
When he's in recovery, his doctor tells him he won't be able to regain his vision so he offers him his finest false eyes. However, due to the insurance cost and hospital bills, the man can only afford a wooden eye as a replacement.
After a few weeks of adjusting to the wooden eye, he's feeling pretty confident so he goes out to a bar. As he sits down to drink, he spies a beautiful woman with a large nose from across the bar.
With every ounce of courage he has he approaches the woman and says "would you like to go on a date with me?"
"Would I!?" Replies the woman excitedly.
"Big nose!" Shouts the man angrily and storms out of the bar.
What did little Suzy spy with her little eye?
A cataract.
An Olympic swimmer...
...is on a cruise ship, when it hits a reef and sinks. Bobbing in the waves, he spies an island in the distance, makes for it, and barely gets ashore. All he finds on the isle are fruit trees, a female sheep and a big dog. The fruit trees provide sustenance, but he starts to feel lonely. The sheep has luxurious fur, beautiful eyes and long lashes that she shyly bats at him. When he approaches her, the dog viciously attacks and repels him. This goes on for months, until he can hardly bear it.
One day he sees another ship sinking at sea. Swimming out, he sees a woman thrashing in the waves. He saves her as she's about to perish, and hauls her ashore. As luck would have it, she's absolutely gorgeous.
"I'm so grateful to you for saving my life...I'll do anything you ask, as a way to repay you."
The swimmer can't believe his luck. "Anything?"
The young woman smiles coyly. "Anything your heart desires."
"Can you take that big dog over there for a walk?"
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