Explosion Jokes
105 explosion jokes and hilarious explosion puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about explosion that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
If you love a good explosion joke, then you're in the right place! Read up on the most hilarious jokes about the Challenger and Columbia explosions, a giant cheese explosion, a bridge explosion, and a toilet explosion. Learn why explosions involving iodine or a fireball created by soldering are particularly funny. Enjoy a good laugh!
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Funniest Explosion Short Jokes
Short explosion jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The explosion humour may include short exploded jokes also.
- What did the redditor say after a stranger gave him a piece of explosive gold? Thanks for the gold, kind stranger
- Mom: "How was school today, Noah?" Noah: "It was awesome! Today we made explosives!"
Mom: "Very interesting. What will you do in school tomorrow?"
Noah: "What school?" - Why the next James Bond should be a woman The next Bond should be a woman!
Can you imagine? Crazy car scenes with spectacular crashes, explosions...
... And all of that while she's parking. - I read a Buzzfeed article called "The Top 10 Things You Didn't Know About Explosive Diarrhea".... number 2 surprised me.
- Recent studies have shown that Apple is trailing behind Samsung in innovation Experts predict that it will take at least another two years for iPhones to bring explosive features to the market.
- My friend has a weird quirk: he gets explosive diarrhea and just can't contain himself when he sees a certain soccer player... And boy, it's messi.
- I'm pretty sure I've figured out my neighbour's 3 favourite films * 10,000,000 Explosions
* Army Guys Yelling at Each Other
* Subwoofer: The Movie - How many terrorists does it take to paint a house? It depends on the force of the explosives.
- Explosive Opportunity A British engineer started his own business in Afghanistan.
He's making landmines that look like prayer mats. He says that prophets are going through the roof. - Bad luck today, I have a bout of food poisioning AND I dropped my Galaxy Note 7 in the toilet by mistake :( Talk about explosive diarrhea.
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Explosion One Liners
Which explosion one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with explosion? I can suggest the ones about explosive and fireworks.
- If A is for apple and B is for Banana then what is C for? Plastic Explosives.
- What's a pirate's favorite explosive? M80
- What do you call a deer wearing an explosive vest? Bombi.
- I just opened an explosive prayer mat business. Prophets are through the roof.
- I made explosive praying rug Prophets are through the roof!
- Whats the worst thing to hear when you have explosive diarrhea? "Are you ticklish?"
- What does NASA stand for Need Another Seven Astronauts
- What do you call an explosive cow in the winter? An a-bomb-in-a-bull snowman!
- Apple is always 4 years behind Android phones... ... so I guess 2020 will be explosive!
- Do t-rex like explosions I dont know but another dino might
- I asked my cousin if business is booming. He sells explosives.
- What is ISIS's favorite candy bar? Allahu Snackbar, it's flavor is explosive.
- Why should you never date an atom? The split is gonna be explosive
- Why did the chemist never say "NO" to anything? Because the reaction could be explosive.
- Alfred Nobel got rich by selling dynamite Growth was Explosive
Nuclear Explosion Jokes
Here is a list of funny nuclear explosion jokes and even better nuclear explosion puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Two nuclear explosions occur next to each other. "You're way too close to me" says nuke #1. "I'm Feynman" says the other.
Heartwarming Explosion Jokes that Make You Laugh
What funny jokes about explosion you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean exclamation jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make explosion pranks.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Where did little Annie go during the e**...?
Everywhere.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
where did alice go during the e**...?
everywhere
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I walked into a store today...
...and they were selling explosives disguised as prayer mats. I wasn't one to judge them; after all, they'd said prophets were going through the roof.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call someone with an e**... f**...?
Dead.
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Maths Question (Muslim version)
Question 1) If Mohammad has 3 apples and gives one to Hassan and one to Ahmed, what is the radius of the e**...?
What fills the entire volume of its container and may become volatile and explosive when compressed?
NYC subway commuters.
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Why do t**... use Nokia phones?
so they can reuse the phone after the e**...
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call Stephen Hawking rolling away from an e**...?
Hot wheels
(First joke, hope you like it.)
Which E.D. is worst, Erectile Dysfunction or Explosive Diarrhea?
The man blushed and answered in almost a whisper: erectile dysfunction..
The embarassed woman also said: erectile dysfunction.
The butch lesbian hesitantly replied: erectile dysfunction.
The gay guy without hesitation answered: depends if you're top or bottom.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Pakistani math problem.
Ahmed has 3 lunch boxes.
He gives one to Mohammed and another to Hassan. Calculate the radius of the e**....
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Oldest YOUR MOM Joke
CHIRON: Thou hast undone our mother.
AARON: Villain, I have done thy mother.
an e**... soundeth! Chiron hast been cooked on a spit!
From Shakespeare's "Taming of the Shrew.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the best part about dating a Muslim
The s**... is explosive
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Did you hear there was a nuclear e**... in space this morning?!
Most people call it the sun.
Note: My dad pulled this on me this morning. My friend hit me when I told them.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Isis have just started making explosive prayer mats
In their first quarterly report they said that prophets were going through the roof.
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Their was an e**... at the cheese factory
No one was hurt, but debris was everywhere..
Patrick's School
Mother: "How was school today Patrick?"
Patrick: "It was great mom! Today we made explosives!"
Mother: "Wow, they do really fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?"
Patrick: "What school?"
I came home and told my mum we were playing with explosives in science.
Mum: what are you doing in school tomorrow.
Me: what school?
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
BREAKING NEWS!! Cheese Factory e**......
De-Brie is everywhere!
Former intelligence agent: "I have potentially explosive information on Trump's relationship with Russia."
Buzzfeed journalist: "Ok please go on."
Former intelligence agent: "I have information that a number of years ago, Donald Trump visits Russia."
Buzzfeed journalist: "Oh really? So then, what happens next?"
Former intelligence agent: "What happens next will shock you."
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Where did Timmy go during the e**...?
**EVERYWHERE**.
He had a newfound respect for life after being spared from such a life-changing event. He went to Arizona, Colorado, New York, England, then settled down in Paris with his now-engaged girlfriend.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Whats the best way to commit s**...?
High explosives. Even if no one remembers you, you will be mist.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My friend died from an e**... after lighting his f**... on fire.
But I know he's at peace because the last thing he saw was a light at the end of his tunnel.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
In j**... training
A man learns how to detonate and conceal explosives.
In order to test how good he is at concealing them, he decides to strap some to himself and walk around the camp. Now knowing they were attached to a remote detonator, he suddenly blows up.
After he dies he sees an old friend he left when going to train for j**....
"How did training go?" Asked his old friend.
"Not too sure, I think I bombed it."
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Two ISIS fighters making a letter bomb
Abdul and Saddam sitting making letter bombs, Abdul says, "Saddam, do you think I've put enough explosive in this envelope?" "I don't know" says Saddam "open it and see". "But it'll explode" says Abdul. "Don't be so f**...' s**..." says Saddam "it's not addressed to you!"
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A t**... had two cases at home...
he stuffed one of them with explosives and headed to the metro. Once inside a wagon he waited until the doors were closed and shouted "Infidels!! now you will die!". Fortunately, that was not the case.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A soldier walks into a bar.
A man in the bar strikes up a conversation with the soldier.
"So sorry if I'm being rude, but how'd you lose your leg?"
"e**... in the war. I miss my friends too much here and I want to go back. They won't let me with my injuries though."
"They still stationed in Afghanistan?"
"No, they're dead"
"My condolences. Have a beer on me."
"That's very kind of you sir but I'm not old enough to drink"
Little Ahmed comes home from school.
His mother asks him:
"So what did you do in school today?"
"We were experimenting with explosives in chemistry class." replies Ahmed.
"What are you going to do in school tomorrow?"
"What school?"
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I started a fried chicken joint. In order to be halal, the chickens must be killed in the traditional Islamic manner:
It's pretty hard getting the little explosive-filled vests on them, though.
A spy put laxatives into a jihadist water supply
The results were explosive
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How did the t**... trigger his explosive?
He assumed its gender.
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They call me the Mary Poppins of artillery...
I deliver...
Super-calibre-ballistic-expedient-explosions
Mike joins a new school.
After school is over he returns home to his mother.
Mom: So Mike, how was your day today?
Mike: It was great! We learned about explosive materials in our lab today.
Mom: That sounds interesting, so what will you learn in school tomorrow?
Mike: What school?
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A t**... struck a local farm, setting off explosives inside the farmer's prized steer, blowing it to smithereens, but apparently committing no other mischief. The crime scene investigator had these words at the press conference...
"Abominable. Simply abominable."
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My friend said he wondered what it's like to blow up...
So I handed him explosives and said "Here, go C4 yourself."
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The armed grenade was under a pile of chick peas, tahini and olive oil.
Captain Smith threw himself on top of it to save his men from the inevitable e**....
His medal for bravery was awarded post-hummusly
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I like my women like I like my cars
Stick a potato in the tailpipe and wait for the e**...
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An e**... happened at a clothes store.
There were many casual tees.
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Breaking News: cheesecake e**... in France
Multiple reports coming in that there was nothing left but de brie.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A t**... is teaching a class
He carefully puts on a jacket loaded with explosives and, turning to his pupils, says:
"Now watch carefully, because I'm only going to do this once!"
My girlfriend is the star of the local police department's bomb squad.
When asked what is her secret to such skilled techniques, she responded:
Plenty of practice every night with a short fuse and explosions that go off early.
I told my wife that she's like a firework
Explosive, distracting, and can put you in hospital if you get to close.
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A dinosaur, a spider, and a cowboy walk into a bar
All three sit at the bar and begin drinking heavily, clearly distressed. The bartender asks them what their troubles are.
The Cowboy takes a shot, then says "my horse got loose, ran into traffic, and got hit by a semi truck carrying gasoline. Cause a whole big e**... and blew my poor horse to bits." The spider nods sympathetically. "I just lost my husband in that same fire. The driver found him, freaked out, and crashed trying to squash my dear hubby."
The bartender is in shock, but finally asks the dinosaur his story.
The dinosaur sniffed, took a sip from his straw, and said "My whole family was on that truck"
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Did you hear about the e**... at the workshop where they make perfume?
It blew up the olfactory
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I am pretty sure allah is the only god
After all, the universe did start with a big e**....
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my aunt ruth died in a horrible e**...
they couldn't even find any body parts to put in the casket
the f**... was ruthless.
By tightly securing our Nuclear arsenal through human, digital, mechanical and chemical means, we've been able to almost completely eliminate the risk of nuclear warhead explosions due to accidents or hostile attacks, however if these past four years have taught us something ...
... it's that we also need to equip our nukes with child locks.
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In the middle of a war...
A group of soldiers are making their way through thick grass when an e**... goes off.
One of the soldiers shouts Be careful it's an armed bush
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Bragging Doctors
Doc 1 bragged, "I had a patient once who blew out his ACL & MCL. I reconstructed his knee, and 2 years later he completed the Boston marathon."
Doc 2 replied, "That's nothing! I had a patient who was in a head-on collision with a truck. I reconstructed virtually all of his joints and more, and later he won an Olympic gold medal in the decathlon."
Doc 3 chucked condescendingly. "Child's play. I had a patient who was in a horrible e**.... He was blown to bits. All they found was a huge, gaping a**.... I put a suit and tie on it, and now he's the owner and general manager of the Dallas Cowboys!"
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Redditor accidentally trips and sets off an e**... in a precious metal mine. What's the first thing they say?
Holy c**... this blew up!
Uhhh thanks for the gold stranger!
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I had an episode of explosive diarrhea during a heist at the bank
s**... went down real fast
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Did you hear about the kettle e**...?
Luckily, there were no casual-teas.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you know...
An AGM guided missile has an e**... big enough to wreck several decks on a warship?
Anyways, I got dishonorably discharged from the navy
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I was involved in quite a bad e**... the other day.
I was buying a grenade and the woman at the counter said "Can I have your pin please?"
Somewhere over Belarus a pilot just had a radio call
Pilot to crew: We are requested to land immediately.
Please prepare the cabin.
Crew: Why, what is happening?
Pilot: Threat of an explosive.
Cew: What? What explosive?!
Pilot: The one they will fire at us if we don't.
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A soldier's wife has just returned from her insurance provider and is looking very, very unhappy
"What's the matter?" Her friend asked.
"I went to get my husband covered privately, but the fine print stated: no payouts when the holder dies as a result of an e**... and/or from injuries sustained in an e**...," she replied.
"Oh? So why would that make you unhappy?" Her friend asked.
"Well, it's too late to stop the freaking timer now!"
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A gigantic gas e**... in a coal mine in the next town killed thirty workers and hospitalised two hundred. But I refused to give to the support charity.
After all, it was only *miner* injuries.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
There's been an e**... at the paint factory where my brother works.
He's missing, presumed red.
Hey I seem to have picked up a stomach bug
So far just explosive diarrhea. I will keep y'all posted as situation can best be described as fluid.
