Excrement Jokes

13 excrement jokes and hilarious excrement puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about excrement that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Excrement Short Jokes

Short excrement jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The excrement humour may include short pooping jokes also.

  1. It seems the amount of coffee you drink... increases the amount of times you need to visit the toilet excrementally.
  2. I read today that the Prime Minister of Australia receives in the mail, on average, two parcels each week that contain human e**.... I wonder who's sending the other one?
  3. Did to hear about the guy who pretended to wash his hair with e**...? It was actually sham-p**....
    *thunderous applause*
  4. There's one thing I've learned after my son got hit in the face with dog e**.... I'm rather good at golf.
  5. My friend claims there's no word for e**... produced by male cattle. I think that's b**....
  6. Amusingly, the flow of e**... in the sewer system is well-regulated. And thanks to modern architectural decor, it's all in all a pretty solid waste system.
  7. A biologist specialized in bovine e**... found a specimen and exclaimed "This is b**...!"
  8. Did you know that the Venezuelans use the e**... of a rare species of bovine in an ancient dish passed down from generation to generation? I lied it's all b**....
  9. Sean Connery used to sing Otis Redding songs as lullabies to his baby son. He was ten years old before he realised the dock of the bay wasn't actually covered in e**....
  10. Motivating words are harder with autocorrect... - Archive your dreams.
    - Be e**... to each other.
    - Nottingham is impossible.
    - The only thing standing in your way is autocorrect.

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Excrement One Liners

Which excrement one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with excrement? I can suggest the ones about vomit and debris.

  1. What do you call fake e**...? Shampoo.
  2. e**... *excellent, autocorrect isn't working.

Excrement joke, e**...

Cheerful Fun Excrement Jokes to Brighten Your Day with Humor and Joy

What funny jokes about excrement you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean stool jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make excrement pranks.

An Scotsman accidentally dropped a penny into an open sewage pit

The pit was full of e**..., and after a few moments of thinking the Scotsman concluded:
"It's not worth it. I will never dive in for a penny!"
Then he checked his pockets for some change, picked two pounds and throw it to the pit:
"Now it's better" he said and jumped into the sewage.

I used to be sesquipedally loquacious

I got bullied because I couldn't even explain that that meant I was talking all the time with big and overly complicated words.
That's when the e**... made physical contact with a hydro-electric powered oscillating air current distribution device.

Noted archeologist Fred Flintstein made an amazing discovery today in Sweden

He found remains of some primitive musical instrument and a small deposit of fossilized e**.... when asked about what they signified,
Fred Flintstein replied: "A dab o' ABBA doo."

Excrement joke, What do you call fake e**...?