Excess Jokes
40 excess jokes and hilarious excess puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about excess that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Excess Short Jokes
Short excess jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The excess humour may include short overly jokes also.
- Please becareful on the road Lots of people are drinking excessively and having their wives drive
- if you added the letters S and E to the X files it would be the X-ES Files. haha excess files. way too many files lol
- I feel really bad for the Mexican Olympian disqualified from weightlifting for excessive use of protein. They told him, "No whey, José."
- String Fight My ex used to hit me with stringed instruments. If only I had known about her history of violin.
- Back in the day, excessive use of commas was considered a very serious crime. It usually resulted in a long sentence.
- What is it called when too many people pass gas inside of a mine? An excess stench hole crisis.
- A friend of mine lost 200 pounds of excess fat and obsolete tissue in a matter of months. Better still, he felt great about the divorce.
- The best thing for a hangover is to drink excessively the night before. Not sure why you'd want one, though.
- Why did Darth Vader get suspended from the Police? He was under investigation for excessive use of Force
- A koala walks into a barber shop A koala walks into a barber shop and hops up into the chair. He points to the excess fur that has grown around his ears and asks the barber, "Can eucalyptus?"
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Excess One Liners
Which excess one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with excess? I can suggest the ones about over the limit and shortage.
- I accidentally bought too many art supplies I'm having an excess stencil crisis.
- My doctor asked if I drink to excess. I told him I'll drink to anything.
- What do you call a whale that mates excessively? Mom.
- why was darth vader arrested? excessive use of force.
- Eggs have recently been added to the endangered species list Due to excessive poaching.
- Why did the pilot ditch his ex-girlfriend? Because she had way too much excess baggage.
- I don't know about the new IPhone XS It just seems a little excess..
- Having excessive mixed drinks isn't the answer... ... but they are solutions.
- If you add S to EX files... You get EX-S files. Get it? Excess files haha
- Why was Luke Skywalker banned from all the local pubs... He used excessive force
- What do you call it when you have midlife crisis and excessively drink red wine? UB40
- I don't know about the key to SUCCESS. But the key to EXCESS can be found in my fridge.
- Today I tried 5 guys One was nice the second was really fun, but all 5 was just excessive
- Why does the new Iphone cost so much? Because its called excess!
- The ministry of excessive resource usage called. Seventy-three times.
Cheeky Excess Jokes to Experience Good Cheer & Frivolity
What funny jokes about excess you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean exhaustion jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make excess pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Doctor: So your child was born without eyelids.
Mother: Well isn't there anything you can do?
Doctor: Yes, when we circumcise him we can take that excess skin and make him eye lids.
Mother: Will he be okay?
Doctor: Yeah, he will be fine, just be a little c**...-eyed.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My therapist said the best treatment for depression is to vigorously rub salt into my skin in order to draw out excess moisture.
Wow thanks I'm cured.
Hippocrates and the Prophet
Tiresias, blind prophet of Apollo, once went to Hippocrates with a serious case of depression. In no time, Hippocrates had figured it out -- "Aha!" said he; "an imbalance of black bile!" He bled the excess melancholia into an urn and handed it to the prophet. Tiresias did not see the humour.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the difference between the holocaust and the excess fat under a woman's upper arms?
You can make a joke about the holocaust.
Reasons to Avoid Water
* Can be extracte from rocket fuel
* Is the main ingredient in pestisides
* 100% of violent criminals have consumed water in the hours leading up to their crimes
* Is the #1 cause of drowning
* Excess consumption will cause sweating, urination and possibly death
* 100% of people exposed to water will die
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I believe that marathons are bad. They are an excess; a p**... of healthy running. Running anything more than a few miles puts serious wear and tear on the joints without any benefit. Runners should be limited to no more than a 5k at the most, and marathons should be banned.
… and don't tell me that I'm just being racist.
Judging by how expensive this year's iPhones are...
It's no wonder why they're called the iPhone Excess and iPhone Excess Max
Why did they call the new iPhone the IPhone XS...
Because you need an excess amount of money to purchase it.
TIL the Hindenburg fire wasn't caused by excess heat
After all, it's not the heat, it's the humanity.
A Qatari,American,and Indian are in a boat in middle of sea.All are bragging about their country
The Qatari : In our country,we have excess of oil.*Throws all fuel in the sea*.
The American : In our country,we have excess of advandced gadgets and technology.*Throws every gadget in the sea*.
The Indian : *Throws both of them in the sea*.In our country, we have excess of people.
My job is to shred the excess thank you notes that our company never sent out.
It's a thank-less job.
I like that it's said iPhone "ten" S
iPhone excess would have been a little on the nose.
Iphone Xs
More like iphone excess
