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Eve Jokes

181 eve jokes and hilarious eve puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about eve that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Make the most out of your Christmas Eve, Friday Eve, Eva or Noel - this article brings you jokes and humor to lighten up your holiday or birthday celebrations! Read on to get your funnybone tickled.

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Funniest Eve Short Jokes

Short eve jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The eve humour may include short noel jokes also.

  1. The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve. It was an apple but with extremely limited memory. Just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.
  2. Did you hear that NYC paid hillary clinton $2,000,000 as a consultant for New Years Eve? They wanted an expert on dropping the ball at the last second.
  3. The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam & Eve. It was an apple with extremely limited memory. Just 1 byte & then everything crashed.
  4. Do you know the oldest computer was owned by Adam and Eve? It was an apple, with very limited memory, one byte and everything crashed!
  5. What's the difference between jelly and jam? Santa doesn't jelly himself down the chimney on Christmas Eve.
  6. Top Biblical experts have reached the conclusion that Adam and Eve were Soviet citizens They had no clothes, one apple between the two of them and they thought they were in paradise.
  7. It's never worth getting into an argument about creationist Adam & Eve versus evolution You're just comparing apples and origins
  8. If adam and eve were Chinese Then we would still be in paradise as they would eat the snake instead of the apple.
  9. Eve gets an apple Eve: I got an Apple.
    Adam: ...

    Eve: ...
    Adam: ...
    Eve: What?
    Adam: I thought we'd decided on Android.
    Eve: The serpent said this was better.
  10. how do you know that adam and eve were white have you ever tried taking a rib from a black man

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Eve One Liners

Which eve one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with eve? I can suggest the ones about birthday and christmas eve.

  1. Why did God create Adam before he created Eve? So no one would tell him how to make Adam.
  2. Why do Adam and Eve use Android? Because Eve violated the apple terms and conditions.
  3. Why did God create Adam before Eve? He didn't want any advice on how to do it
  4. What did Adam say the day before Christmas? It's Christmas, Eve.
  5. Adam & Eve The first people to not read the Apple terms and conditions.
  6. Since Eve was created from Adam's ribs... That technically makes her Adam's side chick.
  7. What did Adam say to Eve on Christmas? It's Christmas, Eve.
  8. What time of day was Adam born? Just a little before Eve
  9. I guarantee you Adam & Eve were white. You ever try and take a rib from a black man?
  10. I invented a war game called "Adam and Eve". It's a first person shooter.
  11. Why didn't Adam buy Eve the new iPhone? Because Apple products are really expensive.
  12. Adam and Eve. First people in history to not read the Apple terms and conditions.
  13. Who was the world's first carpenter? Eve. She made Adam's banana stand
  14. Why was Adam created before Eve? So he had a chance to speak
  15. Who were the fastest runners ever? Adam and Eve. They were first in the human race.

Adam And Eve Jokes

Here is a list of funny adam and eve jokes and even better adam and eve puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • We would all be living in paradise if Adam & Eve were Chinese.. Because they would've eaten the snake and not the apple.
  • Adam asked God..... "God, why did you make Eve so beautiful?"
    "So that you would like her."
    "But why you make her so dumb too?"
    "So that she would like you too."
  • Adam and Eve had the perfect marriage. She didn't have to hear about his mom's cookin' and he didn't have to hear about all the other men she could have married.
  • If there is Adam and Eve, or Adam and Steve. It only seems fair the Eve gets a turn with both... ...That would make it Eve 'n Steven.
  • The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve. Surprise, surprise!
    It was an Apple,
    but with limited memory.
    Just one byte,
    and everything crashed.
  • "Mom, how did humans come to exist?" "Well, you see, God created Adam and Eve..."
    "But dad said we came from apes."
    "He was talking about his family, I am telling you about mine."
  • Yes...First Computer was from Apple The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.
  • When was the first computer? Adam and Eve's time. It was an apple. It only had one byte, then everything went downhill.
  • What was the first thing Adam said to Eve? Stand back, I don't know how big this thing gets!
  • What was Eve charged with after murdering Adam in the Garden? Being a first-person shooter

Adam Eve Jokes

Here is a list of funny adam eve jokes and even better adam eve puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What were Adam's first ever words to Eve? "Stand back - I don't know how big it's going to get!"
  • Seen on a sign outside a church Adam and Eve were the first people to not read the Apple conditions
  • Did Adam & Eve ever had a date? No. They only had a fig!
  • Why were Adam and Eve so happy? They didn't have to worry about in-laws
  • Who was the first carpenter mentioned in the bible? Eve. She made Adam's hotdog stand.
  • It's funny that condoms are ribbed for her pleasure... Because in Genesis, God ribbed Adam for Eve.
  • Why was Adam and Eves marriage so successful? Because he couldn't complain about her mothers cooking.
  • Why did God only use 1 of Adam's ribs to make Eve? Because if He had taken 2 of them, Adam wouldn't have needed her!
  • If 24th December is Christmas Eve, 23rd December should be Christmas Adam. Because men always come first.
  • Why did God create the moon and stars on the eighth day? After spending a day with Eve, Adam begged God for some space

Year Eve Jokes

Here is a list of funny year eve jokes and even better year eve puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Why don't they celebrate New Year's Eve in the Middle East? Cause there's no one left when the clock hits zero
  • The average person has s**... 90 times a year. Man this going to be an epic new years eve!
  • What do Alcoholics call New Year's Eve? Amateur night!
  • If you're worried about not getting a New Year's Eve kiss this year, just remember Valentine's Day is coming up and you're probably going to be alone for that, too.
  • Just checked that the carton of milk in my fridge expired December 31. Unlike me, it had a date on New Year's Eve.
  • LPT: Be careful driving on New Years Eve A lot of men will be drunk, so their wives and girlfriends will be the ones driving.
  • My buddy asked my girlfriend and I if we had any plans for New Years Eve.. I told him we were going to get new glasses.
    And then what ? he asked.
    Then we'll see
  • I'm so broke This New Years Eve I'm gonna party like its $19.99
  • Life Pro Tip ~ if you start watching, "When Harry Met Sally" at exactly 11:15 pm on New Year's Eve, when the clock strikes midnight... You'll still be just as single as when you started the movie...
  • I'm going to stay up on New Year's Eve this year... not to see the New Year in, but to ensure this one leaves.

Christmas Eve Jokes

Here is a list of funny christmas eve jokes and even better christmas eve puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I remember as a child, lying awake at night on Christmas Eve waiting for Santa to come... ...then there was always that awkward silence as he got dressed and left.
  • We are thinking about making chili for Christmas Eve. We're starting a new tradition called 'silent but deadly night'.
  • My favorite Christmas joke: Why do Mexicans have tamale making parties on Christmas Eve? So the kids have something to unwrap on Christmas morning.
  • getting karma on Christmas Eve is easy You could say it's a piece of cake...
  • What do the lady reindeer do while the men are out with Santa on Christmas Eve? They all head down to the Elks club and blow a few bucks.
  • What's the best way to get upvotes on Christmas Eve? It's a piece of cake.
  • An elderly man has urinary incontinence. Why does he drink holy water before going to bed on Christmas Eve? He wanted to sleep in heavenly pees.
  • Why was the milkman afraid on Christmas eve? The ghost of Christmas Pasteurisation.
  • Did you see the newspaper headlines about the Christmas Eve robbery at the German bakery? It said… STOLLEN STOLEN!!
  • Why does Santa go down the chimney on Christmas Eve? Because it 'soots' him.

Friday Eve Jokes

Here is a list of funny friday eve jokes and even better friday eve puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Best Wishes for America's special day today Hope you all have a Happy Black Friday's Eve

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about eve can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of eve puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Humorous Eve Jokes to Bring Fun and Laughter to Your Life

What funny jokes about eve you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean rib jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make eve prank.

A Briton, a Frenchman, and a Russian are standing and staring at a portrait of Adam and Eve...

"Look at their calm, their reserve" says the Briton. "Surely they must be British!"
"Nonsense!" Replies the Frenchman. "They are beautiful. Surely they must be French!"
The Russian finally speaks, "they have no clothes, no shelter, only an apple to eat, and are being told this is paradise. They are Russian."

A couple is walking in St. Petersburg Square on Christmas Eve

They feel a slight precipitation.
"I think it's raining," says the man.
"No, it's snowing," replies the woman.
"How about we ask this Communist officer here? He is always right!" exclaims the man. "Officer Rudolph, is it raining or snowing?"
"Definitely raining," Officer Rudolph replies before walking off.
The man turns to his wife with a smile. See? Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.

What nationality were Adam and Eve?

Soviet, of course. Who else would walk around barefoot and n**..., have one apple to share between them, and think they were in Paradise?

A Frenchman, and Englishman, and a Soviet are admiring a painting of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden.

The Frenchman says, They must be French, they're n**... and they're eating fruit.

The Englishman says, Clearly, they're English; observe how politely the women is offering fruit to the man.

The Soviet replies, No, they are Russian communists, of course. They have no house, nothing to wear, little to eat, and they think they are in Paradise.

An Englishman, Frenchman, and Russian are looking at a painting of Adam and Eve.

"They are so calm and contemplative. They would surely be English." The Englishman says.
"No," the Frenchman says, "they are n**... and beautiful, they would be French."
"My friends," the Russian begins, "no clothes, no shelter, they are sharing an apple between two, they're being watched, and they're told this is paradise. They are definitely Russian."

adam and eve finally figured out the whole s**... thing...

afterward, adam's kicked back, dazed.
god asks "son, where's eve?"
to which adam replies "she's down at the stream, washing up."
god groans "now i'll never get that smell outta those fish."

There was a computer dating back to Adam and Eve..

It was an apple, and a very bad one at that. It only took one byte for everything to c**....

A Brit, A Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the garden of Eden

"Look at their reserve, their calm," muses the Brit."They must be British"
They pondered this possibility but the Frenchman and the Russians soon shake their heads in disagreement.
"Nonsense," says the Frenchman. "They're n**... and so beautiful, clearly they are French". The Brit and Russian agreed on this point but the Russian soon raises an objection to this.
"No clothes, no shelter and they have only an apple to eat but they're told this is Paradise. They are clearly Russian"

Three men are discussing Adam and Eve

The Frenchman says "Adam and Eve must be French. They are beautiful, and n**..., and have all the world's beauty before them."
The Englishman says "Not at all. They are residing in the most beautiful, perfect Garden. They must be English."
The Russian says "They are without clothes, they are forbidden from eating, they are talked to by snakes, and they are being told it's Heaven. They are Russian."

An Englishman, Frenchman and a Soviet go to an art exhibition.

They come to a marble bust of Adam and Eve. The Englishman says "Look at their calm repose, their stiff upper lip. They must have been English."
The Frenchman says "Look at their nakedness, their natural artistic beauty. They must have been French."
The Soviet goes "No no. They have no food, no water, no clothes and no shelter, and they're told they live in a Paradise. They're obviously Russian!"
Joke best told with very bad accents

A Russian, a Frenchman, and an Englishman are in an art museum admiring a painting of Adam and Eve in the gardens of Eden.

The Englishman takes a look at the painting and says "They look so calm, they must be British!" The Frenchmen responds "no no! They're n**..., so beautiful, they must be French!" The Russian says "They have no food, no shelter, nothing but an apple to eat, and they are being told this is paradise? They're clearly Russian!"

An Englishman, a Frenchman, and a Russian are in an art gallery

They are looking at a painting of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden.
"Look at how reserved and calm they are," the Englishman says, "they would definitely be English."
"They are n**... and beautiful, they would have to be French." The Frenchmen counters.
The Russian speaks up, "no clothes, no shelter, no bed, they have only an apple between them, and they're told this is paradise. They are certainly Russian."

God sees Adam in the Garden of Eden...

...and asks him how things are going with him and Eve. "Great!" Says Adam. "We just finished having s**...! s**... is wonderful!" God asks, "Speaking of Eve, where is she?". To that Adam Replies "Oh, she's down at the beach washing up." God is furious. "WHAT? NOW I'LL NEVER GET THAT SMELL OFF OF THE FISH!"

The average person has s**... 90 times a year.

Man this going to be an epic new years eve!

A Frenchman, an Englishman and a Soviet Russian

are admiring a painting of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden. The Frenchman says, "They must be French, they're n**... and they're eating fruit."
The Englishman replies with, "Clearly they're English. Observe how politely the man is offering the woman the fruit."
The Russian then notes, "They are Russian of course. They have nothing to wear, nothing to eat, and they think they are in paradise."

A child and Human Origin

A child asked his father, "How were people born?"
So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on."
The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now."
The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!"
His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."

Three men died on Christmas Eve...

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.
"In honor of this holy season" Saint Peter said, "You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven."
The Englishman fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It's a candle", he said.
"You may pass through the pearly gates" Saint Peter said.
The Scotsman reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells."
Saint Peter said "You may pass through the pearly gates".
The Irishman started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's p**....
St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?"
The p**... replied, "These are Carols".

In Soviet Russia...

A man asks a Russian: What nationality were Adam and Eve?
The Russian replies: Soviet of course!
The man asks: How do you know?
To which the Russian replies: Well they were both n**..., had only an apple to eat, and thought they were in paradise.

An Englishman, a Frenchman and a Russian...

...are in The Louvre, looking at a painting of Adam and Eve.
"Behold!" says the Englishman. "Their resolve in adversity. Their stoicism. They must be English!".
"Nonsense!" cries the Frenchman. "Look at them. They are elegant. They are poised. They are beautiful. Surely they must be French?".
The Russian is quiet for a moment. Then he speaks.
"They have no clothes. They have no shelter. They have only apple to eat between them and are being told this is paradise.
They are Russian".

The Garden of Eden

A Brit, a Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the Garden of Eden.
"Look at their reserve, their calm," muses the Brit. "They must be British."
"Nonsense," the Frenchman disagrees. "They're n**..., and so beautiful. Clearly, they are French."
"No clothes, no shelter," the Russian points out, "they have only an apple to eat, and they're being told this is paradise. Clearly, they are Russian."

A couple are walking through St Petersburg Square on Christmas Eve

They feel a slight precipitation.
The man says, "I think it's raining."
His wife disagrees, "No, it's snowing!"
Unable to agree, the man says, "why don't we ask the nice Communist officer over here? He's always right! Officer Rudolf, is it raining or snowing?"
"Definitely raining," said the officer before walking off.
"See?" the husband says, "Rudolf the Red knows rain, dear."

What did God say when he saw Eve walking out of the sea competely n**...?

Jeez, I'll never get that smell out of my fish.

A Russian, a Frenchman, and an Englishman are in an art museum admiring a painting of Adam and Eve in the gardens of Eden.

The Englishman takes a look at the painting and says "They look so calm, they must be British!" The Frenchmen responds "no no! They're n**..., so beautiful, they must be French!" The Russian says "They have no food, no shelter, nothing but an apple to eat, and they are being told this is paradise? ...They're clearly Russian!"
(Whole thing done in thick fake accents)

Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands

When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset.
You're running around with other women, she charged.
You're being unreasonable, Adam responded. You're the only woman on Earth. The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by someone poking him in the chest. It was Eve.
What do you think you're doing? Adam demanded. Counting your ribs!

Shortly after creating them, God is introducing Adam and Eve to The Garden.

"These are the trees and bushes that bear fruit for you to eat. These are the bodies of water, for you to drink from. These are the animals, for you to name. And this is the forbidden fruit, which you must never eat."
"And what's that?" says Eve, pointing to something on her left.
"Oh that?" says God, realizing Eve is pointing at Queen Elizabeth. "I don't know, that was there when I got here."
^Just ^a ^joke ^I ^heard ^a ^long ^time ^ago, ^which ^felt ^relevant ^today. ^RIP

Adam and Eve

When God made Adam he noticed that Adam was sad and asked what was wrong.
Adam - I'm lonely.
God - That's no good! How about I make you a companion? One that is gorgeous, give you mind blowing s**..., will cook and clean, and doesn't mind it when you spend time with the guys or watch football?
Adam - That sounds awesome! What will it cost me?
God - An arm and a leg!
Adam - What can I get for a rib?

An Englishman, a Frenchman and an American

were arguing about the nationality of Adam and Eve.
"They must have been English,' declares the Englishman. 'Only a gentleman would share his last apple with a woman.'
'They were undoubtedly French,' says the Frenchman. 'Who else could s**... a woman so easily?'
'I think they were Russian,' says the American.
'After all, who else could walk around stark n**..., feed on one apple between the two of them and think they were in paradise?'

A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said,

A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."

It's Christmas time at the Pearly Gates..

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.
'In honour of this holy season' Saint Peter said, 'You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven.'
The Englishman fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter.
He flicked it on. 'It's a candle', he said.
'You may pass through the pearly gates'
Saint Peter said.
The Scotsman reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys.
He shook them and said, 'They're bells.'
Saint Peter said
'You may pass through the pearly gates'.
The Irishman started searching desperately through his pockets and finally
pulled out a pair of women's p**....
St. Peter looked at the man
with a raised eyebrow and asked,
'And just what do those symbolize?'
The p**... replied, 'These are Carols.'

Three nuns die in a car c**..., when they get to heaven, the angel says they have to answer a question to get in

So the angel asks the first nun
Who was the first man?
And the nun replies, Adam
The angel allows her in and turns to the second nun
Who was the first woman?
The second nun answers Eve
Correct, in you go replies the angel
Then turning to the third nun the angel asks
I'm afraid this question is rather difficult. What did Eve say when she first saw Adam?
The third nun thinking says Oh, that's a hard one
Yes, you're in. Replies the angel.

A Brit, a Frenchman and a Soviet are asked what nationality Adam and Eve were.

The Brit exclaims They must have been British! Look at how gentlemanly Adam behaved towards Eve. He must have been an Englishman.
Outrageous! Says the Frenchman. They must have been French. Look at the love that they exhibited towards each other! Only the French can love like that.
The Soviet chuckles and says You're both wrong. They must have been Soviet; they had no clothes, no food, and someone in charge was telling them they were in paradise .

Three nuns die and go to Heaven...

At the Pearly Gates, St. Peter tells them that they must each answer a biblical question to get in, but he reassures them that they're quite easy.
"Who was the first woman?" He says to the first nun.
"Eve." The gates swing open and she walks in.
"Where did Eve live?" He says to the second nun.
"The Garden of Eden." The gates swing open once more.
"Now, seeing as you're the Mother Superior, you must answer a more difficult question, what was the first thing Eve said when she saw Adam?" St. Peter says to the third nun.
"Oh, that's a hard one..."
The gates swing open.

An American, a Briton, and a North Korean look at a picture of Adam and Eve

An American, a Briton, and a North Korean look at a picture of Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden and try to figure out what nationality they are.
The American says, "Look at how free and independent they are, they must be Americans."
The Briton says, "What are you talking about, look at how calm and reserved they are, the are obviously British."
The North Korean says, "You two are both missing the point. They have no clothes, no shelter, they only have and apple to eat between them and yet they are being told that they live in paradise. They're clearly North Korean."

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.


'In honor of this holy season' Saint Peter said, 'You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven.'
The Englishman fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. 'It's a candle', he said.
'You may pass through the pearly gates' Saint Peter said.
The Scotsman reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, 'They're bells.'
Saint Peter said 'You may pass through the pearly gates'.
The Irishman started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's p**....
St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, 'And just what do those symbolize?'
The Irishman replied, 'These are Carol's'
And So The Christmas Season begins......and I sure hope the jokes get better.

A Brit, a Frenchman, and a Russian are admiring a painting of Adam and Eve in Eden.

The Frenchman says "they must be French, look at them, they are n**... and eating fruit". The Brit says "No, they are English, look how politely the man offers the woman the fruit". The Russian says "You are both wrong, they are Russian. They have nothing to wear, nothing to eat, and think they are in paradise

A little girl asks her father where people came from.

He explained about Adam and Eve and they were our original ancestors and they had babies and that's where we came from.
Later that day the girl asked her Mom who explained that their ancestors were monkeys and apes and humans evolved from the monkeys. "So, our relatives are monkeys?" "That's right, dear"
Now the little girl was angry and stomped into the living room to see her Dad and told him what her Mom said. "You lied to me!" the little girl shouted at him.
No I didn't honey. Your Mom was talking about her side of the family

Two college kids are laying next to each other after s**....

The guy turns around and says: I have great nickname for you: Eve, since you are my first. Do you mind?
The girls responds: As long as I can call you JumboJet
- Sure thing! Is that because of big I am down there?
- No, you are my 747th.

A couple was walking in St. Petersburg Square on Christmas Eve

A couple was walking in St. Petersburg Square on Christmas Eve.
"I think it's raining," says the man.
The woman replies, "No, it's snowing."
"Let's ask this communist officer here. He's always right," explains the man. "Officer Rudolph, is it raining or snowing currently?"
"Definitely raining," Officer Rudolph replied.
The man turns to his wife and says, "Rudolph the red knows rain, dear."

Three Nuns Die And Each Have To Answer A Question From God To Get Into Heaven...

God asks the first Nun, "Who were the first two people?"
She says, "Adam and Eve".
He says, "Okay, you're in."
God asks the second Nun, "Where did Adam and Eve live?"
She says, "The Garden of Eden".
He says, "Okay, you're in."
God asks the third Nun, "What was the first thing Eve said when she saw Adam?"
She says, "Hmm, that's a hard one."
He says, "Okay, you're in."

Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands.

When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset. 
"You're running around with other women." she charged. 
"You're being very unreasonable," Adam responded. "You're the only woman on Earth." 
The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by someone poking him in the chest. It was Eve. 
"Just what do you think you're doing?" Adam demanded. 
"Counting your ribs," replied Eve

An Englishman, a Frenchman and a Russian were arguing about the nationality of Adam and Eve.

'They must have been English,' declared the Englishman. Only a gentleman would share his first apple with a woman.'
'They were undoubtedly French,' said the Frenchman. 'Who else could s**... a woman so easily?'
'I think they were Russians,' said the Russian. 'After all, who else could walk stark n**..., feed on one apple between the two of them and think they were in Paradise?'

A couple is walking in St. Petersburg Square on Christmas Eve. They feel a slight precipitation.

I think it's raining. says the man.
No, it's snowing. replies the woman.
How about we ask this Communist officer here? He is always right! exclaims the man. Officer Rudolph, is it raining or snowing?
Definitely raining. Officer Rudolph replies before walking off.
The man turns to his wife with a smile See? Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.

New Years Eve

On New Year's Eve, Marilyn stood up in the local pub and said that it was time to get ready. At the s**... of midnight, she wanted every husband to be standing next to the one person who made his life worth living.
Well, it was kind of embarrassing. As the clock struck, the bartender was almost crushed to death.

[garden of eden]


**Snake:** Pssst! want an apple?
**Eve:** No thanks, I do not sin.
**Snake:** What's the length of the opposite side of a 30° right triangle with a hypotenuse of 20?
**Eve:** 10
**Snake:** Thanksss
**Adam:** How did you calculate that?
**Eve:** Oh no.

Adam was returning home late one night at paradise after drinking with the dodo and the unicorn.

Eve got angry and yelled at him: "YOU ARE SEEING ANOTHER WOMAN!"
Adam responded: "Don't be silly, you are the only woman on earth", and went to sleep.
Later that night Adam woke up, feeling a tickle in his chest and saw it was Eve.
"What the heck are you doing?" he asked
"I'm counting your ribs," she responded.

This guy was shopping in town with his wife on Christmas Eve.

They got separated so she called him on his phone and said: "Where are you?" The guy said, "Do you remember that little jewelry store we went to last year where you saw the diamond bracelet that you loved but I didn't have enough money to buy it?" She said "Yes! Yes! I remember!" So the guy said, "I'm in the bar next door to that place having a beer."

Adam and Eve eat the apple

of the forbidden tree, God sees this and is very angry, "Adam!" he says, "for what you have done from now on by the sweat of your brow you will eat your food...." "And you Eve...you will pay with *blood*
But you can pay me in comfortable monthly payments

Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands.

When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset.
You're running around with other women, she charged.
You're being unreasonable, Adam responded. You're the only woman on Earth.
The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by someone **poking** him in the chest. It was Eve.
What do you think you're doing? Adam demanded.
*Counting your ribs!*

One Christmas Eve, a man and his wife were shopping in town and became separated...

The woman called him on her cell phone and said, "Where are you?" The guy said, "Remember that little jewelry store we went into last year and you found that diamond necklace that you wanted, but I couldn't afford to buy it for you?" The woman was overcome with emotion and said "Yes, yes ... I remember." And the guy said "I'm in the bar next door to that store having a beer."

I'll never forget the Christmas Eve my father went to jail.

It didn't take long before he got violent, abusive, screaming and thrashing around, smearing f**... on the walls...
I'll never play Monopoly with him again.

I got arrested on New Year's Eve.

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jokes about eve

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these eve jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.