Ethics Jokes
56 ethics jokes and hilarious ethics puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about ethics that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Laugh and share a few ethics jokes that touch on the principles of morality and principles of conduct in law, business, and medicine. Learn why it is important to adhere to business ethics, medical ethics, and lawyer ethics. Use these jokes to have a lighthearted look at the importance of ethical behavior.
Quick Jump To
- Short Ethics Jokes
- Ethics One Liners
- Business Ethics Jokes
- Lawyer Ethics Jokes
- Medical Ethics Jokes
- More Ethics Jokes
Funniest Ethics Short Jokes
Short ethics jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The ethics humour may include short moral jokes also.
- What do you get if you cross a cow with an octopus? An immediate cessation of funding and a stern rebuke from the ethics committee
- What do you get when you cross a cow and an octopus? A reprimand from the Scientific Ethics and Integrity Committee and an immediate withdrawal of your grant funding.
- What do you get when you cross a kangaroo and an Elephant? A letter from the Scientific Ethics Committee and a withdrawl of your grant money.
- What do you get when you cross a cat and an octopus? A strong reprimand from the ethics committee and immediate recission of all funding.
- What do you get if you cross a woman with a whale? Your research funding suspended and a severe reprimand from the ethics committee.
- What do you get when you cross an octopus and a lion? A stern rebuke from the ethics committee and an immediate withdrawal of funds.
- What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo? A sternly worded letter from the ethics committee and your funding revoked.
- What do you get when you cross a bat and a man? A ban. Specifically, a lifetime ban from the genetics labs, as well as a visit from the ethics committee.
- What do you get when you cross a cow with an octopus? A visit from the ethics committee and immediate withdrawal of your funding.
- What do you get when you cross an orca with a housecat? An angry ethics committee and your grant revoked.
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Ethics One Liners
Which ethics one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with ethics? I can suggest the ones about philosophy and integrity.
- What do my girlfriend and ethical capitalism have in common? They don't exist
- I pirated an ethics textbook. I'll find out if I did the right thing soon enough.
- FIFA Ethics Committee
- How to fail an ethics exam? You cheat on it.
- Ellen Pao's ethics and morals.
- I'd kill for a good work ethic.... ...But I just can't be arsed.
- I have a bullet like work ethic I perform like I have just been fired
- What do you get for crossing a cow with a bear? A call from the ethics board
- I downloaded a book on Ethics from the PirateBay I hadn't gotten to that chapter yet
- I just passed my ethics exam... Of course I cheated
- It is far more ethical to eat animals than plants Animals have a chance to escape
- The Civil War wasn't about slavery . . . . . . it was about ethics in journalism.
- I got caught cheating at an Ethics test today.. And they suspended me for a week.
- Ethics of the police
- What do you call an Asian guy with a great work ethic? Task Oriental.
Business Ethics Jokes
Here is a list of funny business ethics jokes and even better business ethics puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Did you know Brendan Fraser took a Business Ethics class before filming The Mummy Returns? He wanted to learn about pyramid schemes.
- What's the world's shortest book? Jewish book of business ethics.
Lawyer Ethics Jokes
Here is a list of funny lawyer ethics jokes and even better lawyer ethics puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Lawyers' Ethical Dilemma When a client gives you two hundred dollar bills stuck together from the bank machine to pay a $100 bill, do you tell your law partner?
Medical Ethics Jokes
Here is a list of funny medical ethics jokes and even better medical ethics puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Gotta admire the n**...'s ethics on medical research... ...since they advanced the field without hurting any animals.
Entertaining Ethics Jokes to Laugh Out Loud Fun with Everyone
What funny jokes about ethics you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean right and wrong jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make ethics pranks.
Ethics done right
A father is explaining ethics to his son, who is about to go into business. "Suppose a woman comes in and orders a hundred dollars worth of material. You wrap it up, and you give it to her. She pays you with a $100 bill. But as she goes out the door you realize she's given you two $100 bills. Now, here's where the ethics come in: should you or should you not tell your partner?"
Anyone know a good joke about cigarettes and ethics?
I'm doing a presentation about the subject and I would love to throw in some humor, but I can't think of anything that is quick and simple. Any jokes you can loan me? =P
Thanks for reading/posting.
Plato and Aristotle were in the music room of the Academy in Athens.
Plato was at the piano, and Aristotle was holding a small lute in his hands.
Plato, do you know the unpredictability and exactitude of ethics and reflective philosophical hermeneutics require phronesis as an ontological counterpoint to peripatetic conjecture?
No, Plato replied. But if you play a few bars, I may be able to pick it up.
List of the shortest books
1. The Australian Book of Foreplay.
2. Contraception by the Pope.
3. The American Guide to Etiquette.
4. Healthy Marriages by the British Royal Family.
5. Consumer Marketing Ethics.
6. Career Opportunities for History Majors.
7. My Life's Memories by Ronald Reagan.
8. Integrity by Bill Clinton.
9. The Wit and Wisdom of George W. Bush.
10. What I've Accomplished by Barack Obama.
What do you get when you cross a cat and a wild boar?
Revocation of your grant money and a stern rebuke from the ethics committee.
What do you get when you cross a duck and a pig?
A media circus that focuses on the morals and ethics of genetic engineering.
Latest news from the FIFA corruption scandal:
Shock announcement from FIFA's Ethics Committee:
"FIFA has an Ethics Committee"
What do you get when you breed an elephant with a rhino?
A visit from the university board of ethics.
As soon as the inauguration is over, I'm getting a position on Trump's ethics committee.
I'm not political, I just need some quite time alone.
What do get if you cross a Kangaroo with an Elephant?
A stern letter from the scientific ethics committee.
What do you get when you cross a cow, an octopus, and a man?
a reprimand from the ethics commissioner.
What do you get when you cross a baby with an octopus?
An angry letter from the ethics committee and immediate cessation of all funding.
what do you get if you cross an octopus with a scorpion?
A freeze on your funding, and an immediate visit from the ethics committee.
If Aristotle was to write a book on ethical music what would he call it?
NickelBachean Ethics
What do you get when you cross an elephant and a giraffe?
A visit from the ethics board an a rescind of your grant.
What do you get when you cross a hamster with a polar bear?
A loss of project funding and a stern telling off from the university ethics committee
Scientists say they may be able to synthesize a completely clean biofuel using the enzymes in finely shredded fungi, such as mushrooms...
Some critics have questioned the ethics of the process, but admit they are comforted by the researchers' strong Morel fibre.
A doctor has s**... with a patient
A doctor has s**... with a patient. And the guilt is killing him, it goes against the ethics code every doctor swears by.
So one part of his brain tells him: "don't worry, you're not the first guy to sleep with a patient, and you definitely won't be the last. You're a bachelor too, it's fiiiine"
The other part of his brain says: "Bro, you're a vet"
What do you get when you cross a chimpanzee with a rhinoceros?
A meeting with the ethics committee and swift removal of your research funding.
Law Professor: You're currently failing your ethics course.
Me: _slides a $20 note across the table_ How about now?
Professor: _pockets the note_ Still failing.
Me: OK, can I have my $20 back?
Professor: What $20?
I've always been told that you shouldn't tell jokes at other people's expense.
Which makes me question the ethics of charging people to watch stand up comedy.
What do you call the the Head of the Washington D.C. Financial Ethics Board?
>!They would be the Capitol Capital Principle Principal!<
