Episode Jokes

Humoristic puns and funny pick up lines

Star Wars Episode 7-9 Titles Revealed

Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens

Star Wars Episode VIII: The Force Sleeps For Five More Minutes

Star Wars Episode IX: The Force Is Late For Work

Why did Star Wars episode 4,5,6 came before 1,2,3?

Because in charge of planning, Yoda was.

Ever wondered why starwars episode 4,5 and 6 came before episode 1,2 and 3.

Because, incharge of scheduling Yoda was

I was watching an episode of "How it's Made" that was all
about how they make mirrors.

I'd like to be the guy that has to inspect the mirrors. That's a job I could really see myself doing.

What do you get if you drop a piano on an army base?

A flat major.

What do you get if you drop a piano down a mineshaft?

A flat minor.

What do you get if you drop a piano on a beehive?

B flat.

What do you get if you drop a piano on a Morris Marina?

An episode of Top Gear.

Empire Strikes Back is still my favorite StarWars episode.

One could say it is a perfect 5/7.

Why was Star Wars released in the order of episode 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3

In charge of order, Yoda was

RP - Why did episodes 4,5,6 come befor 1,2,3?

Because in charge of planning, Yoda was.

If Two and half men, the Big Bang theory and How I met your mother had ever done a crossover episode

It would have been called How I banged your mother with two and a half men

Jesus Christ was featured on a recent episode of Hoarders

Apparently, his saving really got out of control!

My go-to accounting joke

(Acknowledgement: This joke came from the Drew Carey show. I don't remember specifically which episode. I don't even know why I was watching it.)

The owners of a micro-brewery are sitting around a table having their monthly board meeting.

The accountant stands up and says "So, let's see, this month, we lost ... hmm... hmm... Hey! Does anybody have a black pen?"

The CEO says "I can go buy one."

The accountant replies "Yeah, but then we won't need it anymore."

How to carve a fish.

In the 70's in Scotland, there was a TV show called 'Weirs Way', where a man called Jim Weir would walk around the highlands, chatting with local characters.

One episode, he met an old man who carved elaborate walking sticks. Jim picked up a stick that had a beautiful leaping salmon for a handle, and said to the old man, "So tell me Archie, how would you go about carving something as intricate as this?"

The old man looked up from his workbench and said, "Well, it's surprisingly simple, Jim. First you take a piece of wood, then you just cut off all the bits that don't look like a fish".

Why did Vader (Anakin) finally rebelled against the Emperor?

In Episode 3, he helped carry out Order 66 to kill all Jedi.
In Episode 4, he helped carry out Order 67 to destroy Alderaan.
In Episode 5, he helped carry out Order 68 to destroy rebel base on Hoth.
In Episode 6.... the Emperor was just too old and nasty for Vader to carry out Order 69.

Why did Vegeta name his son Trunks?

...find out on the next episode of Dragon Ball Z

Why do they call the first episode a pilot?

Because without one, the show would never get off the ground.

The King and Queen get a Puppy

After the whole donkey episode, the King and Queen decide to stick to dogs, and get a dachshund. Barely a month old, the puppy was given to the couple after being abandoned by its mother, the only one of the litter to survive.

Night after night, the court physicians and veterinarians watched the dog, the Queen herself often feeding the blind, half-starved animal with an eye dropper.

One morning, after worrying all night, the King and Queen shed tears of joy when the little animal struggled out of his bed and took his first steps.

The next day's headline:

"Royal Weiner Stands Up for First Time; King and Queen Jubilant but Tired"

So I'm already kind of mentally unstable and my girlfriend just told me that she's pregnant.

I think I'm having a zygotic episode.

A Canadian version of Breaking Bad is in the works

It'll be one episode long. Walt is diagnosed with cancer and receives treatment.

Episodes 4, 5, and 6 of Star Wars came before episodes 1, 2, and 3...

...because in charge of scheduling, Yoda was.

Guy walks into a bar...

Find out more on the next episode of Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives.

The other day I started watching Game of Thrones

I told my friend about it. Told him all about the violence, murder, decapitation, gore, sex, gay sex, midget sex, prostitution, rape, paedophilia, incest and inbreeding... And he was like: "Oh so you're still on the first episode then?"

That Military Documentary series on Japan in WW2 was really good...

...Unfortunately it never survived past the Pilot episode.

At last, I finally got around to watching the new episode of "Doctor Who" ...

... it was about time.

Did you hear what they're planning for the next episode of 'Glee'?

It's a 'Walking Dead' crossover.

In one episode of Dexter's Laboratory, Dexter fires Dee-Dee because.....

....he can't focus properly when she distracts him. So he hires this pretty blonde girl to mimic Dee-Dee, and he asks her "I want to see you dance" "That'll be 50$ extra" Took me awhile to figure that one out

I'm making a TV show about the different roles people serve on aeroplanes.

Wanna see the pilot episode?

Why do sheep love Star Wars Episode V?

Because Dey-go-bah.

A sitcom about a 9/11 hijacker was in the works for Comedy Central

But it never made it past the pilot episode

Most people call the movie Rogue One

but I like to call it Star Wars Episode: PI because its between Episodes 3 and 4

Since The Simpson's just reached the 600 episode milestone, I'd like to take a moment to remember it's importance to american history ...

Its unwaveringly realistic portrayal of the yellow people's disenfranchisement while pursuing the American Dream is a testament to our nation's tolerant spirit.

The kids were really suprised when I put ginger in their curry...

...they really *did* love that cat.

> Stolen from a recent episode of *Match Of The Day*

What's the worst part about season 1 of Lost?

The *pilot* episode.

Did you hear about the episode concept for Doctor Who where The Doctor accidentally falls into a food themed alternative dimension?

He was attacked by The Garlics

What's the difference between a Dragon Ball Z episode and a Markiplier video?

A *Dragon Ball Z* episode doesn't have as much screaming

Why was the ghost on an episode of Hoaders?

He was a little...


Did you guys see that episode of Finding Bigfoot last night? [SPOILERS]

They didn't find Bigfoot.

I missed the latest episode of Rick & Morty

Boy, do I feel stupid now.

People think that Ed Sheeran cameo in Game of Thrones was bad...

But I thought Amy Winehouse getting hit in the face with a rock in last nights episode was just in bad taste.

First baby born with DNA from 3 people

This week the world's first baby was born with DNA from three different people using a new controversial technique developed by US scientists. The baby will be featured in the upcoming episode of Maury and spoiler alert, they're both the father.

A police officer pulls a man over for driving all over the road...

...and discovers the man has clearly been drinking.

Officer: "You'll have to come with me for a breathalyzer test, sir."

Man: "I'm afraid I can't do that officer, I'm ams-- *hic* alths-- I'm asthmatic. I could have an episode."

O: "I see. In that case, I'll need to take you down to the station for a blood test."

M: "I can't do that either, see, because I'm a helmpho-- a hemophiliac. I could bleed out."

O: "*sigh*... okay, just stand right there and hold your arms out to your sides, tilt your head straight back, and touch your nose with your right index finger."

M: "I'm afraid I can't do that either, because I.................."

O: "What, you have vertigo?"

M: "Yes! Sorry, I can't think very fast after 14 beers!"

My workplace is like an episode of Gilmore Girls

Fast paced and full of unlikeable characters.

How many 'Dragonball Z' characters does it take to change a lightbulb?

All of them-over a six episode arc.

But Goku is the one to screw it in after mastering transformation into a Super Sayin Electrician.

What did Dr Dre say to his wife during Netflix and chill?

Hope you're ready for the next episode

I think I should make a show all about roads..

Every episode will begin with "Let's this road on the showww"

If the war on terror were a TV show what would you call 9/11?

The pilot episode.

What did Snoop say Dr. Dre while binge watching their favorite TV show?

Are you ready for the next episode?

The Problem With Scooby-Doo

Every Scooby-Doo episode would literally be two minutes long if the gang went to the mask store first and asked a few questions.

I told my friend a joke about last night's Game of Thrones episode..

He agreed it was well done.

How many Saiyans does it take to fix a lightbulb?

One...but it takes 3 episodes.

*find out in the next episode of Dragon Ball Z!*

I hate watching an episode per week

I'm more of a season per day kinda guy

English version of Breaking bad in progress

It will last one season with only one episode where Walt will be diagnosed with Cancer but will get treated by NHS and wil end up living on benefits.

What are the "White Walkers" doing when we don't see them in a GoT episode?


My wife has been mad at me lately because she says I need to get my priorities straight...

I told her we can talk about it after this episode of Spongebob.

What do you call the sequel to Straight Outta Compton about Dr Dre and Snoop Dogg?

The Next Episode

What's the best part about Dragon Ball Z?

Find out in the next episode of Dragon! Ball! Z!

What are the funniest episode jokes of all time?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking about Episode? Well, here are the best Episode puns to laugh out loud. Crazy and funny Episode pick up lines to share with friends.

Joko Jokes