Epilepsy Jokes
57 epilepsy jokes and hilarious epilepsy puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about epilepsy that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Laugh until you cry with this compilation of dark, sick, offensive and bad epilepsy jokes. From Cesar to dementia to ADHD, this article has everything you need to make your day.
Funniest Epilepsy Short Jokes
Short epilepsy jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The epilepsy humour may include short epileptic seizure jokes also.
- I dropped my wife's epilepsy medicine in the washing machine instead of fabric softener. Now her clothes don't fit.
- I think my pet goldfish has epilepsy. He's ok swimming around but take him out to play he has a fit.
- What happened to the guy who mixed up his Epilepsy tablets with his laundry tablets? His clothes don't fit anymore!
- Carpe Diem is a great motto and all... but if you seize everyday, you probably have epilepsy
- I hate when people make fun of people with epilepsy It makes me so mad I shake and twitch with anger
- Did I ever tell you about my old girlfriend who had Epilepsy? I went to a rave. I thought it was so cool that I filmed it. But when I showed it to her, she just rolled her eyes.
- I'm part of a secret club for people with epilepsy... ... we have a secret ~~hand~~ shake.
- The Detroit Pistons have sold naming rights to a drugmaker to promote their new treatment for Petit Mal epilepsy. Henceforth to be known as Little Seizures Arena
- I told my employer I had epilepsy... He said I wasn't fit for work
- Why did the guy with epilepsy have no friends? He didn't fit in.
Share These Epilepsy Jokes With Friends
Epilepsy One Liners
Which epilepsy one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with epilepsy? I can suggest the ones about seizure and narcolepsy.
- Do you know about the Roman emperor who had epilepsy? It was Julius Seizure.
- What is the motto for the Epilepsy Research Society? Sieze the day
- What does the guy with epilepsy do after his workout? Has a shake.
- I told my mom she had epilepsy for April fool's day... She fell for it.
- Today, March 26th, is Epilepsy Awareness day. So get on out there and seize the day!
- What do you call Italian children with epilepsy? Little Caesars
- The cops raided our house and set off my epilepsy... Talk about a search and seizure
- Did you hear about the stripper with epilepsy No one in the club could shake it like her
- Shakespeare is like a fish with epilepsy I can't even begin to grasp it.
- What game do people with epilepsy play instead of hide-and-seek? Search and seizure
- What did they call the district manager with epilepsy? Carpe DM
- What is it called when a woman with epilepsy gives birth? A BIRTHQUAKE!
- Why did the doctor think the fat guy had epilepsy? He kept having Little Caesar's.
- I'm starting a pizza restaurant for children with epilepsy Little seize-ers
- What is it called when somebody forgets they have epilepsy? Amseizure.
Bad Epilepsy Jokes
Here is a list of funny bad epilepsy jokes and even better bad epilepsy puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- The rave break dance champion was finally defeated by an underdog ! Too bad she had epilepsy.
Delightful Fun Epilepsy Jokes for a Roaring Good Time
What funny jokes about epilepsy you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean migraine jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make epilepsy pranks.
My town has a large epilepsy hospital
Today, I wanted to do something nice for the kids: they're always so sad about not being able to do normal things. It was a $1200 investment for all of them total, but...
Who's ready for laser tag!?
So a blonde girl takes her goldfish to the vet...
...and she says to the veterinarian, "Hey, I think my goldfish has epilepsy; it has these awful seizures!"
The veterinarian takes one look at the fish and replies, "Well, it looks alright to me."
The blonde replies angrily, "Well Jesus, let me get it out of the bowl first!"
A man with epilepsy goes to a rave
He started breakdancing
People with epilepsy see the opportunity
And they seize in it.
I just moved in to a new flat with two girls...
I just moved in to a new flat with two girls, it's been a bit of a nightmare to be honest. The first one has really bad OCD, whenever she goes in to a room she has to turn the light switch on and off 17 times. That's nothing compared to the other one, she's got epilepsy
How do you call a party of people with epilepsy?
Foam fest
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why do cannibals love eating people with epilepsy?
Because their favorite side dish is Seizure Salad.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man who suffers from epilepsy
is carried by two paramedics in a single s**....
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My buddy smokes w**... for his epilepsy
He'd have a fit if he ran out!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Appreciating a joke
As an epileptic, I appreciate jokes about epilepsy. As a Jew, I appreciate Jewish and holocaust jokes. As a Caucasian, I enjoy the very few white jokes.
If only I was an Oompa Loompa, then I can enjoy Donald Trump Jokes.
A man takes his goldfish to the vet
A man takes his pet goldfish to the vet and says "I think my goldfish has Epilepsy".
The vet conducts a thorough examination of the goldfish. Then he says to the man "I can't find anything wrong with this goldfish. I don't think it has Epilepsy."
To which the man replies "well you haven't even taken him out of the bowl yet."
What do an un-oiled engine and an epilepsy patient have in common?
Seizures.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call Albert Einstein having an epilepsy fit?
s**... of genius.
My family loves to have dance parties.
My dad will play music from his iPod, and I'll go to the light switch and make a nice strobe light effect.
Everyone loves it, especially my younger cousin. He gets down on the floor and starts breakdancing!
It makes him so happy, and he needs that extra joy in his life, especially since the doctor recently diagnosed him with epilepsy.
Two brain surgeons are discussing cases over lunch.
Surgeon 1: I just don't understand it. I treated a monk with epilepsy by implanting a seizure inhibitor device - the one with a microcomputer that sends out current to negate the seizure. It's working perfectly and his seizures are gone, but he keeps putting acorns and stuff into hollow spaces in trees. He didn't display this behavior before the surgery but now he seems compelled to do this.
Surgeon 2: The answer is obvious. After the implant he is a chip monk.
An ambulance was called to a local restaurant this afternoon.
When the paramedics walked in, the saw two men on the floor having seizures. The paramedics split up, each going to one of the men. Suddenly, both men stopped their convulsing. The paramedics asked if they were all right.
"Oh, we're fine. We both have epilepsy, but we don't let it interfere with our work. This always happens when we finalize a job."
"What do you mean."
"I'm a salesman for my company, he's the buyer for his. We just completed the deal, so we had to shake on it..."
